Relapsing yet again
 

It was all going so well. I was12 weeks sober, going to day rehab and enjoying it. So how could it all have gone so terribly wrong? I was depressed, suffering severe side effects I get from an unrelated medication and I wanted relief. My neighbour called round this morning to see if I was ok after the bad fall yesterday. "I am fine" I said but I should have said is "what fall?" Then my friend called and said "where are you, we were meeting for coffee" she said. "I overslept sorry," I said I've lost my rehab place, my physical and mental health are both poor and I feel trapped in a ball of fear and degredation. Where do I go from here? I am 53 years old, have had oesophageal cancer (alcohol related), have a severe depressive illness and have lost all motivation.
If anyone has dragged themselves out of a hole like this, I could use their inspiration.
Thanks

Hi Harvey.

I read on Davey's thread you are going to tell your doctor about everything and I think that's very important.

YOU can do this. You CAN do this.

+1

Congrats on the 12 weeks. You can do it again. Dust off and get to work.

I'm late in replying but wanted to add my support. I've been through intense depression and trauma, so I have lots of hope for you too. We are so much stronger than we realize and so much more resilient.

Congrats on having been sober for 12 weeks. You still have that experience. You know how to be sober for 12 weeks. And we gain knowledge each time around. You know more now about staying sober. Make small steps if you need too. What small thing can you do that is nurturing for yourself?