Emotional Outbursts Just want some information from you guys. I've been clean of alcohol before, my best was 3 months and during that time I found my mood was a lot more even once the withdrawal passed. I'm sitting here sober again, I'm past the withdrawal and yet last night I blew up at a family member. I don't mean violently, I've never been a violent person, but my temper was provoked very easily, which anyone who knows me will tell you is very rare. I feel absolutely awful about it and I've already apologised to them several times over. I don't suffer any mental illnesses, I'm not depressed or anything of that nature, so I'm just wondering if these outbursts can happen when you've been sober for a while. Even though it hasn't happened before during my sober periods can it just suddenly occur sometimes? I really shouted at this person over an utterly minor thing, I just feel awful even though they have forgiven me. Don't worry the shame won't drive me to drink because I know that won't solve anything. Just hating myself for such an out of character event. |
Originally Posted by DaveyT
(Post 3887612)
I'm just wondering if these outbursts can happen when you've been sober for a while. Excessive drinking alters brain chemistry. It should be mostly healed in months, but depending on the intake levels it may never completely go back to how it was pre-drinking. Some of us addicts just establish a new baseline. The science is evolving, and I find it fascinating, even if the literature is dry as an old fart. It certainly reinforces what a BAD IDEA it is for an addict to drink again. Glad you're feeling strong in your resolve. |
I feel a little better knowing it's normal for someone recovering from alcohol. I'm so unused to mood swings. I suppose because it's uncommon for me that might mean I stand a good chance of recovering fully. This really is the first true mood swing I've ever had. Just another reason to stay sober, hopefully my brain will go back to normal :) The look on this persons face when it happened though, it was just pure shock because it was that out of character. Really not going to forget it. |
The positive of the situation is that you are able to process it SOBER. |
I believe alcohol was effecting my brain for at least 6-12 months after i quit for good . Might be worthwhile reasearching how others anger manage and seeing if anything chimes with you , Bestwishes, M |
I'm finding that my mood can turn on a dime. For me it's not anger, but just a wave of sudden sadness or despair. I think AVRT is actually helping with that part of it as well. It doesn't feel good, but knowing that it's part of healing allows me to get a little distance from it, if that makes sense. I kind of think of it like there's me and there's the mood and I am just observing it. Sorry, it's kind of hard to articulate. |
Originally Posted by mecanix
(Post 3887924)
I believe alcohol was effecting my brain for at least 6-12 months after i quit for good . Might be worthwhile reasearching how others anger manage and seeing if anything chimes with you , Bestwishes, M I've been doing some more reading and it does seem that 6-12 months is the usual duration for this, although I read it can continue for 2 years in the heaviest drinkers and some 20 year users always have some leftover damage. I drank excessively for 10 years, but at least it wasn't 20 years and I was downing 2 bottles of wine rather than 2 bottles of scotch. It's still bad but could have been worse I guess. I thought of something new today. In the last 12 months I had started having the classic black outs. Before that I could usually drag up the memories of the night before but yeah in the last 12 months I've had more than a few nights that I can't remember at all. So it's proof the damage was getting bad. |
Hi Davey My emotions were like a rollercoaster ride for a few months in early sobriety. Just hold on. The ride slows down. Congratulations on staying sober. |
Same here, I started noticing the improving mental and physical state about 8 months in. Hang in there, the ability of our body to recover and heal is amazing, just give it time. |
Thanks for all of these replies guys, they are very helpful. It's just been a bit of a shock for me as the last time I was sober for 3 months I didn't get any of the emotional symptoms and when I was drinking I didn't get any real mood swings. I was more of a relaxed, sleepy drunk. Coming to the end of the first week sober again, already feeling the benefits. |
Congrats on your week of sobriety!
Originally Posted by DaveyT
(Post 3889531)
Thanks for all of these replies guys, they are very helpful. It's just been a bit of a shock for me as the last time I was sober for 3 months I didn't get any of the emotional symptoms... In my reading I am coming across known phenomena that I have experienced (such as increased moodiness) but had failed to recognize as associated to my drinking. Or related to the progression of my addiction. It's interesting and affirming. |
Originally Posted by Nonsensical
(Post 3889558)
Are you taking the new occurrence of mood swings as anecdotal proof that the symptoms associated with alcohol addiction get worse with continued/repeated use? It's just another big wake up to what I've been doing to myself. Of course I always knew the health effects of alcohol abuse but there is a difference between logically knowing and actually accepting what is happening. Like most addicts I put the outcomes out of my mind rather than face reality. Repeated myself a little with this reply, sorry about that. |
Originally Posted by SoberKnitter
(Post 3888173)
It doesn't feel good, but knowing that it's part of healing allows me to get a little distance from it, if that makes sense. I kind of think of it like there's me and there's the mood and I am just observing it. Sorry, it's kind of hard to articulate. SoberKnitter, I think you articulated this very well. What you described is a much larger aspect of a powerful mental health tool, and AVRT is only a tiny, specific instance of it. I am referring to mindfulness. Mindfulness is a state of active, open attention on the present. When we are mindful, we observe our thoughts and feelings from a distance, without judging them good or bad, just as the beast exists outside of our self. Our thoughts just are. 7 ASPECTS OF MINDFULNESS 1. NON-JUDGING becoming an impartial witness to your own experience. 2. PATIENCE 3. BEGINNER’S MIND willingness to see everything as if for the first time. 4. TRUST – in yourself 5. NON-STRIVING by doing nothing, all is done. 6. ACCEPTANCE seeing things as they actually are in the present. 7. LETTING GO From a workshop with Jon Kabat-Zinn |
Originally Posted by freshstart57
(Post 3889662)
SoberKnitter, I think you articulated this very well. What you described is a much larger aspect of a powerful mental health tool, and AVRT is only a tiny, specific instance of it. I am referring to mindfulness. Mindfulness is a state of active, open attention on the present. When we are mindful, we observe our thoughts and feelings from a distance, without judging them good or bad, just as the beast exists outside of our self. Our thoughts just are. 7 ASPECTS OF MINDFULNESS 1. NON-JUDGING becoming an impartial witness to your own experience. 2. PATIENCE 3. BEGINNER’S MIND willingness to see everything as if for the first time. 4. TRUST – in yourself 5. NON-STRIVING by doing nothing, all is done. 6. ACCEPTANCE seeing things as they actually are in the present. 7. LETTING GO From a workshop with Jon Kabat-Zinn Thanks for this! I'm off to find a book by Jon Kabat-Zinn. |
On the topic of mindfulness, you will come across a favorite of mine, Eckhart Tolle's A New Earth - Awakening to Your Life's Purpose. You can find lots of other resources on mindfulness, and even search this site for references by googling 'site:soberrecovery.com mindfulness'. |
The Power of Now by Eckhart is also an amazing book. |
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