recycle

Yeah but it is pretty cool that she dated Dr. Who. It must have been cool traveling the universe.

LaFemme

Broke Dr. Who's heart too...awfully.

Artoro

It's not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.

A Greek stoic philosopher said that two thousands years ago and it's pretty much what cognitive-behavioral therapy is about nowadays.

Genie

This is a thought I keep in my head. I believe Michael Shermer said it:

"The meaning of life is to live a life with meaning."

Simple. I don't have to contemplate the universe or look for magical solutions.

Murray4x5

Hi

So, how did the reception go? You may be treated one way by your family, but me-thinks you got a more honest, supportive response from the people who were looking at your artwork. From what I've seen, your work is really good. It's no easy thing to paint a moving animal and make it appear fluid, or natural. You have a gift.

I agree with stacylove...We all love you here!!!

Murray

LaFemme

Thanks Murray,

Alas...by the time I got to the reception it was ending...I got no traction on my work because I wasn't there. I was showing my children's portraits and it was at a target rich environment (private school).

So tonight I am off to see my sister in a play in NYC ....and I will work on forgiving her...which is healthier than staying angry. Letting go of anger is the only useful thing to do with it.

LaFemme

I need to remember that this time last year I would have been sitting in my dirty living room, drunk off my ass, dishes in the sink...piles of laundry everywhere...my brushes dry and not having produced a painting worth my while in two years.

So even though I am so frustrated by the fact that I can't paint full time at least I am painting...and painting the best stuff of my life.

I just want to scream on Sunday afternoon...as I hit my perfect stride right as I have to stop for the weekend. How many paintings are trapped inside because I can't figure out how to fix my life?

LaFemme

Just got off the phone with my LC...she had the excellent point that if I was where I am today, 5 years ago things would be different...in terms of my art...if I saws producing like I am now back in. 2005 I would probably be doing ok financially but the economy being what it is its harder to get off the ground.

shockozulu

So many good posts here LaFemme. I really liked that Jack Black movie. Have you ever seen High Fidelity? That stars Jack Black and John Cusack and takes place in a used record store. I love it because I spent most of my teenage years in a similar store.

LaFemme

Hey shock...never saw it.

Struggling with jealousy right now...on fb and SR it seems everyone has a family...which is pretty much the only thing I ever wanted in life ever since I was a little girl.

Not sure why I'm posting about it but needed to get it off my chest....sigh.

Edit...although I am profoundly grateful I didn't put kids through my drinking.

LaFemme

Humans are highly social animals. We’re not meant to suvive, let alone thrive, in isolation. Relationships stimulate our brains—in fact, interacting with others may be the best kind of brain exercise. - azureseas in another thread.

Yesterday was Easter and although I went to Church and for a walk with a friend I was mostly alone. I set the table nicely and made a braised lamb shank, root vegetables and a healthy salad. I lit the candles and poured a nice glass of ginger and tonic. I gave thanks and chewed slowly and enjoyed my food. It still only took me 15 minutes to eat my dinner.

I haven't taken a survey but I think the people who preach being comfortable by your self here on SR usually have spouses and families. I am pretty comfortable in my own skin, but that doesn't mean I enjoy being alone. Humans are social creatures, we aren't meant to live alone.

I know drinking won't make the being alone better so the trick is to find a way not to be alone. They say wait a year before starting new relationships, and I agree up to a point, had the right person come along in the past 9 months I would not have put off a relationship.

The truth is I would like to meet someone now and get on with my life. I spend too much time on SR because I don't get enough social time in real life. The problem is I don't know how to go about meeting someone, truth is I wasn't so hot at it when I drank either.

I know about online sites but I haven't had any luck with them. I work 2 jobs that are both pretty solitary, and I live in a town where most people are married with kids. All my friends are married with kids and although I have asked, no one knows anyone single to introduce me to.

So, what to do?

jamdls

Then I guess maybe I'm not human? I have survived and thrived as a loner and been much happier than I ever was in a relationship. I have no close friends, no family other than daughter and her family within 1000 miles and I only see my daughter 4-6 times a year and most of the time I'm a very happy person.



Sorry you feel down, I don't have any good advice (obviously since I prefer being alone) but I do feel for you. Hugs.

LaFemme

I don't know that I feel "down" per se...more like the realization that in the past I drank because I was lonely, and now I need to tackle the problem proactively, but I'm not sure how to go about that.

Although I did just get off the phone with a lovely young woman who might rent my spare bedroom this Summer which would be nice

JohnBarleycorn

This may sound strange, but do you go to the gym? In my experience, most men will use any excuse to strike up a conversation, and there are a lot of lonely people at the gym. IE, people trying to get in shape in order to go "back out" to dating.

I saw what I think is your picture on your web site, and I say go to the gym every day and someone will bite.

Just don't be like one of those annoying more-talk-than-exercise types who would interrupt my routine. :-)

Word of caution about "nerds" who get in shape, though - they usually still need a little encouragement, but it doesn't take much.

Beardo

I wish I had some advice to share but sadly I don't, my experiences of meeting people etc. have been a pretty good guide as what NOT to do. Maybe some sort of social group? like hiking or running or something? or perhaps enrol in a local course that interests you, that way even if you don't meet someone then you're still getting something out of it?
JohnBarleycorn's idea of the gym sounds pretty solid

Hwdcarver

the gym is a good start, The library, The grocery store, I'm pretty sure there is someone out there for you for sure!!!! Keep your eyes peeled!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LaFemme

Thanks guys! Sadly the gym membership has been cancelled due to my financial constraints...when I went it didn't seem to be full of single men. Part of my problem is that I live in uber-suburbs where there don't seem to be many single men...seriously every man I see is wearing a shiny gold ring...and believe me I check!

azureseas

I really enjoy my alone time and find it exhausting hanging out with people all the time, except for hubby, I'm lucky, he's easy to be around and we can be together the whole day with barely saying a word working on our different interests
All things in balance I say, you see people that can never be alone but I don't think that's healthy either.
If I had to hit the dating scene again I think I'd check out that pet dating site, its for dog lovers. I am dog crazy, my fur babies are the joy of my life. If a man loves his dog (not the type that leaves them in the back yard) it can be an indicator of a lot of good character qualities IMO

LaFemme

When I lived here 6 years ago the dog park had a good number of single men but they've all gotten married....but maybe I need to increase my attendance and mix up the times I go.

LaFemme

Thanks azure...I forgot about hat site.

I'm the type of person that loves being around people...I'm the only single person I know that enjoys going to my friends children's birthday party....nothing more fun than being surrounded by piles of happy screaming children imo...I'm strange that way

A lot of artists dislike class because you are with other people...I love painting in a group...very strange indeed