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Alternative Approaches (Part III)

Old 08-06-2010, 07:47 PM
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Supercrew, it sounded to me like she was just concerned about how she talked about secular and other paths and not anything that you said.
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Old 08-06-2010, 10:19 PM
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Ooops sorry, that came out all wrong, my post was goin to be reactive to another thread on SR and I would have ended up with a scolding...had nothing to do with my friends here in secular land:-)

Sorry, sorry a million times sorry Supercrew!!!!
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Old 08-06-2010, 10:28 PM
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watch it LaF...I got an eye on everything





D
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Old 08-06-2010, 10:31 PM
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Originally Posted by LaFemme View Post
Ooops sorry, that came out all wrong, my post was goin to be reactive to another thread on SR and I would have ended up with a scolding...had nothing to do with my friends here in secular land:-)

Sorry, sorry a million times sorry Supercrew!!!!
No worries LaFemme! I just don't want that warden Dee coming down on me again!!
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Old 08-06-2010, 10:35 PM
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Eeeek! I'm scared!!!! Now I'm going to have nightmares of the Dee monster lurking in my inbox!!!!!!
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Old 08-06-2010, 11:20 PM
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Been reading about increasing D2/D3 dopamine receptors and wound up on a page for "healing with sexual relationships."

Hubby's going to be all "Let me boink you sober, honey!"

Be right back, lol-ing forever.
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Old 08-06-2010, 11:24 PM
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Link please!!!!

If I can convince my wife that this is part of my recovery therapy it might be an easier process!!
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Old 08-06-2010, 11:30 PM
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www (dot) playbo....er, not that one.

This is the subpage I was looking at: Social Support and Dopamine Receptors (significant to everything we do on this site) | Reuniting

It talks about how popular people have more dopamine receptors (chicken or egg?), which makes sad, sober, sense to me.

In case anyone is sensitive, I'm warning for erotic art and photos of animals doing it.
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Old 08-07-2010, 09:11 AM
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Hi all! I promised to keep you all informed of my progress with my life coach, so here are some of the things we discussed today.

Not to judge ourselves, there is no good or bad as long as we are doing the best we can at all times.

Even illness and disease is an opportunity to learn and grow.

We derail ourselves, its never outside forces.

When we try to change, to embrace our true self, our ego doesn't want to give up control. We need to express our gratitude to our ego, but then retire it and let our true selves run the show.

We need to live our lives with an attitude of gratitude.

Hope that's new agey enough for you all! Have a great day:-)
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Old 08-11-2010, 09:13 AM
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Hi Y'all!

So, I asked my LC for a book recommendation. She recommended I read anything by Wayne Dyer. So I went to the store and he's got like 20 books, and I picked one called "Your Sacred Self". So far it's really interesting.

The chapter I am reading is about how we grow up being told certain things which become our "beliefs"...things we "believe" are different than things we "know", beliefs are thoughts that limit us, for example, I was raised being told that a career as an artist was not viable, this became my belief, and it limits me. Yet I once I do something which is different from my belief system then I "know" differently...I'm not sure if I am really explaining it well. Anyway. that's my thought for the day.
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Old 08-11-2010, 01:41 PM
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Hi LaF,

I have never read any of Dyer’s books, I guess I always considered him the white Deepak Chopra. Not that there is really anything wrong with Chopra. I just get suspicious of media gurus and their multi-thousand dollar retreats. Perhaps that is the only way to get your message out these days? However, both seem to promote a secular spirituality that respects the world’s wisdom traditions and promotes meditation, I think that is a healthy approach. There are words wisdom threaded through so many sources, it is easy for me to become bewildered and think I have to read it all. Each of the thoughts your LC gave you to reflect upon has a similar statement in a variety of the world’s wisdom traditions. I believe meditation is necessary to give meaning to mere words. Hopefully, your LC has told you to “go and sit” in addition to reading?
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Old 08-11-2010, 03:26 PM
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I have read a book or two by Dyer, and as far as self help books go he is a little sleepy for me. You can checkout PBS, he has his presentations on there occassionally. He kind of reminds me of a toned down Dr. Phil, but the message is pretty good. I really have to get back into reading the self help stuff, I always find it motivating. I will make a point to find a new book this week.
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Old 08-11-2010, 03:49 PM
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I hadn't ever heard of him before. I admit his writin style is a little sleepy, but maybe it makes me think a little more instead of zipping through.

My LC already knows I meditate, I asked her for a book suggestion.

Last time I did this type o reading I was still drinking, so hopefully it will be much more beneficial this time:-)
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Old 08-13-2010, 11:59 AM
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I know I talk a lot about meditation and I really believe in its value and effectiveness, however, I've never been able to apply it consistently, maybe because I was still drinking, but I want to try again. Any thoughts and suggestions?
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Old 08-13-2010, 02:41 PM
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I had the same problem and I would also like to hear what others have learned. My practice has been all over the place at times. Currently, I am lucky because I sleep like ca-ca, waking up consistently between 3:00 and 4:19 am. Rather than battle that, I use it as my meditation time. I meditate for 30-60 minutes then crash on the couch for an hour. ('though, I skipped last night to watch the meteor shower - v/cool.) Since I have been sober I have been catching 15 to 20 minutes as soon as I get home. (My family has been great about accommodating this, my Great Dane not so much. I doubt even the Dali Lama could meditate through one of his wet willys.) Other things that have helped me:

-Guided meditation/hypnosis cds are a great teaching tool, but it is not really meditation.

-If you can find a yoga teacher that values savasana and does not yap too much.

-Autogenics: a completely secular meditation technique developed in Europe in the thirties is really quite wonderful. (The problem is that it is a six week program to learn autogenics and using other meditation techniques during that time is discouraged.)

- Another stroke of luck for me is that there is Soto Zen priori in my town that has scheduled Zazen which works with my schedule. I will probably do that more over the winter.

LaF, do you think your problem is motivation or technique?
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Old 08-13-2010, 07:12 PM
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Recycle, I pretty much blame motivation...I hope now that I'm.sober I can get.over that, I'm just having a hard time getting started with feeling sick still.
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Old 08-13-2010, 07:54 PM
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Gosh laf I am sorry to hear you are still off your feed. These are some big time changes to our metabolism. Be extra nice to yourself this weekend.
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Old 08-13-2010, 08:51 PM
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I consider this illness a direct result of the hell I put my body through for 15 years. I also hope it is my bodies way of eesetting itself...nothing worth having is easy.
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Old 08-14-2010, 09:13 AM
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Okay, I just finished my weekly conversation with my LC. This weeks highlights are:

Regret is a wasted emotion for 2 reasons: 1) because we can't change the past, and 2) we went through whatever we went through, in order to learn something.

The rest of our conversation dealt more with my perceptions of monetary value in regards to my work so isn't exactly pertinent here.

I hear an awful lot of regret on SR though, and think that there is a benefit in viewing the addiction we have all suffered with as an opportunity....thoughts?
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Old 08-14-2010, 09:52 AM
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Originally Posted by LaFemme View Post
I hear an awful lot of regret on SR though, and think that there is a benefit in viewing the addiction we have all suffered with as an opportunity....thoughts?
When I was in active addiction and was able to work I used to look down on those addicts that lived on the street. Then I became one of those addicts. Still I could always see that there were some addicts below my stature. Then came recovery where I begun to realize that I was suffering greatly even when I was able to hold a job. Just as much as I suffered without the ability to work.

Now I'm trying to make a point in here somewhere...but my brain isn't cooperating. Oh lets see...compassion...yea. I can now see that suffering in addiction comes in many disguises. And no matter how I tried to dress up my addiction with a good job, nice clothing, car and whatnot many addicts suffer the same regardless of stature in the community.
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