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Fantabulous Secular Connections Check-in Part VIII

Old 08-06-2011, 01:42 PM
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Thanks, anew! Well, 16 days now. Goona walk down, and but a few more colored pencils, here, and maybe draw a bit later on.
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Old 08-06-2011, 09:51 PM
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OK, kinda slow here! I guess it is now tomorrow, so I am beginning day 17. I hope everyone is well, and please, to those that may feel shy, feel free to join in
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Old 08-07-2011, 02:58 AM
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Hi everyone.

It's been a whirlwind the last 10 days. Last Wednesday I called a recruiter at a rival company just to see what they were offering, after a tip from a friend. I wasn't looking for a job, really, but thought it wouldn't hurt to see what they were up to. The recruiter told me he'd get back to me after he got back from vacation.

Thursday I was working, went to help a friend on his job location. He met me at the highway and I followed him through the maze of turns to his location. Except that about halfway there he hit a cattle guard kind of funny, it shredded his tire, he lost control of his truck on the gravel road, and rolled it. Totaled his truck, but he was uninjured except for a couple cuts from broken glass, but... I dunno. I've never had trouble with that sort of thing, I usually shrug it off pretty well, but I've had nightmares about it. Not so sure. I've had a lot going on though, so I'm hoping it goes away soon. I have that sort of anxious feeling I had constantly for a while right after I quit doing drugs. It's like doing drugs gave me an anxiety disorder or something like that.

Friday morning the operations manager at the rival company called me. He asked a couple questions about my experience and asked if I could start Saturday morning; I hesitated for a second and he offered to increase my start pay. So... my new company puts me in a hotel every night, I love it. No more living on oil rigs!! It's the same job but it's been crazy learning how this place does stuff and all that new-job stuff. And I'm working nights; no complaints there since it's still getting up over 100 degrees during the day.

And with that, it's pretty much my bed time. Good night, everyone!
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Old 08-07-2011, 06:58 AM
  # 344 (permalink)  
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That's so nice gneiss!!!! (Well, the news about your new job, not the witness to an accident story.) Keep us posted on how it's going
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Old 08-07-2011, 08:35 AM
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Good late morning! Hope everyone has a great day.
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Old 08-07-2011, 11:56 AM
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Well, still not drinking, but some bad news...I feel like I am in some bad dream, still in shock, I suppose:

Well, day 17, but also some bad news. I posted this elsewhere, but guess I really feel the need to share/vent, here, I feel like this is a bad dream:

I can’t believe this. I went out to go to work, and saw my car: it had been struck while parked, and basically totaled. No note, no nothing. Half the whole front end is tore off, fluids leaking, totaled. The fron whell is totally detached, and on it's side, torn from the tie rod, break lines ripped apart, fluid everywhere, even under the engine/transmission. A 1998 Metro. And though I have insurance, it is just liability…somebody said it might pay something under the uninsured motorist clause, but I can’t reach them until Monday. Even so, it would probably be maybe $1,000 at most, given how old the car is, and the miles. But I doubt the policy covers anything.

So I got a police report. I’ll probably have it towed away tomorrow for parts. They were able to determine by the debris that it was a Toyota Tacoma that hit us, 2004, but sadly, they didn’t find a VIN on anything, and there were no witnesses.

The bad part is I now have no way to work…and no savings, and really, really bad credit and no way to really afford a car payment. In the short term, I can change my work hours…for a while, I hop…but I don’t know what will happen. If I lose this job, I lose my health insurance, and so does my mate…and it is not a good time to lose a job.

I will call my parents…I am so afraid to, though, I mean, at my age, I feel like I should have OK credit and all that, it makes me feel like some sort of failure, eldest son, smart and full of promise and…

My mind is just a scramble right now. I was gonna go to a local furry meet for the first time (those people who dress up like goofy animals and such) but as it meets way out at this mall, there is no public transportation there…I guess that is pretty minor, but still, I guess it reminds of all the limits now, without a car.

I guess I am still alive, and at least was not in an accident that involved injury.

But I just feel numb. I had just spent $400 fixing the car, and another $1,000 on the insurnace mess issue….and am beyond flat broke, with garnished wages for the next three months…this is not seem like the recipe for car shopping, somehow.

Anyway, I am going to keep a level head, and not go out and get drunk, or jump in front of a train, or anything like that….

But damn….I seem to have bad luck.

In a state of numb shock on day 17...
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Old 08-07-2011, 03:39 PM
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Oh, HP! What a mess, and how stressful. So sorry to hear about your car. But also I'm glad you aren't going to go drinking. Won't solve anything and you know it.

The guy I'm working with right now.... *sigh*. I like my job but I dislike having to do his work. It's awkward because he's been with the company for 2 years, I've been here a week and have half the experience he has, but boss still asked me to be lead (which kind of makes me his supervisor). I think he's not happy about that, but if he's unwilling to do his job I can see why our boss didn't ask him to be lead. Oh well. It's only one assignment, it'll be over by the end of the month.
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Old 08-07-2011, 09:54 PM
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Good luck on the new job Gneiss!

HP...so sorry about your car situation. I can relate to anxiety about asking for help at a certain age...me too...but when j drank I wrecked my finances and though im putting things back together I can't fix things overnight.
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Old 08-08-2011, 02:33 PM
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So sorry to hear about your car, HuskyPup. My boyfriend also drives an older Metro. He bought it for it's great gas mileage. That's one smart little car, for the price!

Can you use public transportation to get to your job so at least the job's not jeopardized?
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Old 08-08-2011, 03:31 PM
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HuskyPup, so sorry to hear about your car.

Gneiss, great news about the new job. They put you up in a hotel and an increase in pay. That's wonderful.

Been holding on to my sobriety during this tough time with my sick mother. I've been burning up my telephone calling other people in sobriety lately. It helps me to keep my life in perspective.
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Old 08-09-2011, 02:09 PM
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Hi everyone, well, still sorting car issues out, here, kinda crazy...but still not drinking, and day 19! So there is that. I'll start posting and responding to other posts more, as soon as time allows, and my brain clears!

H. Pup
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Old 08-09-2011, 10:13 PM
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Working nights kinda sucks...

But hey, no time for the bar when I have to be at work.
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Old 08-10-2011, 04:03 PM
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Yeah, been working nights for 5 years, now!

Well, day 20, here, insurance company towed the car away...hopefully, by Monday, I will know if they will give me say, $500 to $1,000 for the poor old reliable thing
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Old 08-10-2011, 05:36 PM
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I hope you get the 1k for the car HuskyPup. Also good going on staying sober through this.
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Old 08-11-2011, 04:48 AM
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Fingers crossed for $1000, HP.

I've come down with a cold or something, horrible earache, and can't sleep. But... ya know, Little House on the Prairie reruns are keeping me entertained.... *sigh*

Stay sober, my friends!
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Old 08-11-2011, 05:46 AM
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Keep pluggin' away on the sober time, HP-hoping for $1000.

Hope you're feeling better soon, gneiss.
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Old 08-11-2011, 01:27 PM
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Thanks, everyone! Well, day 21, 3 weeks! I am taking a 'combination' approach, using some cognitive and other psycological strategies, as well as working with a pagan based step program. That may not be the best to talk about here, but I finally began to actually chronicle the work I am doing here, on this tread. Comments welcome!

Also, I will share some insights from the transactional analysis school of psychology on drinking, from Erik Berne's book, Games People Play, as Well as Steiner's book, Games Alcoholics Play. Both of which look at alchoholism as a life-script or 'game', as opposed to a disease.

Feeling pretty good today, hope all are well.
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Old 08-11-2011, 01:31 PM
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Thanks for sharing your methods of recovery with us, HP! Good luck on the car and insurance situation. Hoping for the best for you.

Checking out your link now...
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Old 08-11-2011, 11:52 PM
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Thanks, anew. I took some cough syrup, went to sleep, and woke up feeling worse. Now I'm all spaced out, on top of being exhausted and sick. Toward the end of my drugging I would get the worst over-emotional comedowns, like I'd be sitting in the middle of the floor bawling for no apparent reason. And now it seems like any medication I take other than maybe Advil does the same thing (though not as strongly as dope did). So I'm sitting on an oil rig trying not to cry, because the way my thoughts are going right now my life's a joke, my job's a joke, my relationship with my bf is a joke, my friends are jokes, everyone tells me what I want to hear and no one takes me seriously. Everything just seems kind of hollow. Really? Just from cough syrup? Maybe just being sick and not getting enough sleep and working nights is also getting to me.

What really bothers me is that when I get tired and sick and cranky it's always turned inward. I'm never short with other people, I just hate myself. I know it's a passing thing, I'll feel better in a few days. But life sure isn't much fun in the meantime.

Hope everyone is doing well. I'll get better in a few days. Blah.
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Old 08-12-2011, 04:35 PM
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Originally Posted by gneiss
So I'm sitting on an oil rig trying not to cry, because the way my thoughts are going right now my life's a joke, my job's a joke, my relationship with my bf is a joke, my friends are jokes, everyone tells me what I want to hear and no one takes me seriously. Everything just seems kind of hollow. Really? Just from cough syrup? Maybe just being sick and not getting enough sleep and working nights is also getting to me.
Sounds like it may be a combo of the cough syrup, stress, no sleep, work... all of it. Sorry you're feeling so down, Gneiss

Hope you get to feeling better soon!
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