Fantabulous Secular Connections Check-in Part VI
gas company will check out the leak for free=) I am in santa barbara now. I am totally unsure of where I am living or how, but my mergirl soul sings by the beach, and my gypsy feet are free again=)

Ug. A bad night. Passed out, woke up with bruises, how did I get those? But at the same time, waking in a kind of fog, in this very hot weather where nothing seems real anymore. It is hard not to have AC in Baltimore when it's in the 90s........have felt weaker and weaker. I still have a pulse, I think.....
HP
HP

That's one of the reasons we can't leave the area. The beach. Its just too beautiful. Once I get this move thing settled down we'll have to get together!

Wow, Santa Barbra, I was there once, that's a real fancy place. Pretty but pricey
Well, gonna be gone for days without the internet, still have not got a tech to come out to the house.........it's getting frustrating.
So I have a little break from work, hope I can be 'good'......
HP

Well, gonna be gone for days without the internet, still have not got a tech to come out to the house.........it's getting frustrating.
So I have a little break from work, hope I can be 'good'......
HP

I think I finally have a job. I'll know tomorrow morning, but I'm pretty sure I cinched it. There's good news and bad news though. Good news: It's full time (which is also bad news since I'm a full time student) and so the financial stuff should ease up in a hurry. It's graveyard shift, which definitely will not interfere with classes, but I'm going to have to work at getting 7 hours sleep each afternoon. Hubby will see me only on weekends, but now house and yard work will be fully his responsibility. I'd be working as night auditor at a hotel, and I am assured that there will be plenty of time to do homework while at work - that's gonna be what saves me.
Anyway, I'm partly relieved and partly dreading it. I haven't fared well on graveyard shifts in the past, but it's just until the end of the semester (hopefully).
Anyway, I'm partly relieved and partly dreading it. I haven't fared well on graveyard shifts in the past, but it's just until the end of the semester (hopefully).


Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: France
Posts: 783
I drank again last night, I didn't even try to fight the urge, it was something along the line of I've been good I deserve a drink. I've decided to start a sort of journal I usually don't take the time to write things down, I'm hoping maybe that will help me focus on my alcoholism and why I really want to quit drinking.

Poppy, sorry to hear that. I love the idea of journaling though. It's powerful, and empowering, to be a little further down the road and look back to where you were. It's funny that I can't exactly remember where I was in my head even last week - tricky brains we've got. I bet you find journaling helpful. As they say in nicotine recovery circles - never stop quitting.
I did get the job. It felt really good - after sending out so many resumes and filing so many applications and not getting a single call back. He was full of praise. He said that he had already decided if I showed up for the interview, he would offer me the job. He told me I was way overqualified (which I knew). He asked if I truly understood that it was $10 per hour. He also asked for a year's commitment (gentleman's agreement), which I gave him. He assured me that I would have at least six hours per night for homework and encouraged me to bring in my laptop, books, whatever I needed. So, since I'm already committed to this job, I've decided that instead of leaving school when I get my degree in December, I'm going to stay and get my teacher's certification. That would guarantee me a job in the local school district. Here, newly hired certified teachers only start at $30,000 per year, but that includes three months off in the summer, two weeks off in the winter, one week off in the spring, every federal holiday and sick leave. Sounds pretty good to me (going to sound a lot better after a year of working full-time and going to school full-time!).
My one regret is that I promised my daughter-in-law that I would be there for the birth of her first baby (my first grand-baby) because her mom won't be able to be there. I called today and told her about the job - and if she goes into labor while I'm on shift, I won't be able to leave because I'll be the only one there. She was cool with it though. Most first mom's have at least 12-hours in labor, so I should make it anyway - I hope.
I've already made an appointment to talk to someone on Monday about getting into the teacher licensure program. I'm starting to feel excited about the future again. For a while there, I was wondering if I would ever work again (scary thought).
Hugs to all,
I did get the job. It felt really good - after sending out so many resumes and filing so many applications and not getting a single call back. He was full of praise. He said that he had already decided if I showed up for the interview, he would offer me the job. He told me I was way overqualified (which I knew). He asked if I truly understood that it was $10 per hour. He also asked for a year's commitment (gentleman's agreement), which I gave him. He assured me that I would have at least six hours per night for homework and encouraged me to bring in my laptop, books, whatever I needed. So, since I'm already committed to this job, I've decided that instead of leaving school when I get my degree in December, I'm going to stay and get my teacher's certification. That would guarantee me a job in the local school district. Here, newly hired certified teachers only start at $30,000 per year, but that includes three months off in the summer, two weeks off in the winter, one week off in the spring, every federal holiday and sick leave. Sounds pretty good to me (going to sound a lot better after a year of working full-time and going to school full-time!).
My one regret is that I promised my daughter-in-law that I would be there for the birth of her first baby (my first grand-baby) because her mom won't be able to be there. I called today and told her about the job - and if she goes into labor while I'm on shift, I won't be able to leave because I'll be the only one there. She was cool with it though. Most first mom's have at least 12-hours in labor, so I should make it anyway - I hope.
I've already made an appointment to talk to someone on Monday about getting into the teacher licensure program. I'm starting to feel excited about the future again. For a while there, I was wondering if I would ever work again (scary thought).
Hugs to all,

I drank again last night, I didn't even try to fight the urge, it was something along the line of I've been good I deserve a drink. I've decided to start a sort of journal I usually don't take the time to write things down, I'm hoping maybe that will help me focus on my alcoholism and why I really want to quit drinking.
For me it comes down to weather I act out or not....all thoughts aside. If I choose to act out...then I do. I can also choose to refrain from acting out. I can only do my best...and with that I feel accomplished. Because I stay in addiction treatment "no matter what" That I know I can do.
So stay and stick it out "no matter what", please poppy.
Hugz and love...

Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: France
Posts: 783
Taking a good look at all the thought process that influence your behavior is a good path to follow. Sometimes I think is cool to have a few brews. Yet at the same time I think otherwise. But as long as I don't act on my thoughts I come closer to understanding where I have control. Sure my mind goes all over the place: drink, don't drink, don't think, think about drinking and so on, with great detail and planning too...LOL.
For me it comes down to weather I act out or not....all thoughts aside. If I choose to act out...then I do. I can also choose to refrain from acting out. I can only do my best...and with that I feel accomplished. Because I stay in addiction treatment "no matter what" That I know I can do.
So stay and stick it out "no matter what", please poppy.
Hugz and love...
For me it comes down to weather I act out or not....all thoughts aside. If I choose to act out...then I do. I can also choose to refrain from acting out. I can only do my best...and with that I feel accomplished. Because I stay in addiction treatment "no matter what" That I know I can do.
So stay and stick it out "no matter what", please poppy.
Hugz and love...

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