Bamboozle

Good. Screw toxic people.




Big huge smiles for you. Just hang in there, gneiss.

I had a bit of a scare last night. I called the bank line and it said that both my checking and savings were at 0.00. I got....upset. I didn't drink...but I did buy a pack of cigs. Up until last night I had been 18 days smoke free. Had one. It tasted nasty. Oh, well.

I called the line this morning and everything was okay. They must have been having some technical problems....If I hadn't checked the line again I probably would have made a fool of myself at the bank.

Normally I'd get bombed after something like that...but as it was I really didn't have any money to spend. I told my mom I wanted to get some cigarettes. She said, "Do you need some money?" and laughed herself silly. Got me to laugh.



I hope I don't give the impression that being sober is always so wonderful. Truth is it's not. I still have some really bad days. On the whole, though, everything is better. At least I don't have to worry about my organs nearly as much...and having a clear mind is very nice. As more time passes I can better handle my emotions. It's a long, bumpy road.

gneiss

Life is better in that I have fewer problems of my own making, but mostly it's same $hit different day. However, I'm able to handle it better sober. Running has kinda been helping, too. And photography, even if it's just on my cell phone. It's easier to post pics to my F@cebook account than it is here, because I can SMS the pics from my phone. Otherwise you'd get drowned in photos! Pretty pictures are relaxing, I guess.

Bam, your story about the bank made me laugh. One time my debit card was declined at the store and I knew I had the money in my account. No worries, I figured the bank was having a hiccup, I paid with a check and went to the next store. Same thing happened there. So I called my bank (about 10:00 Friday evening... always a good time to get customer service at a bank) and I was supposedly overdrawn by-- get this-- $1.9 MILLION!!! Would you like to see someone flip out? 8:00 Saturday morning I was at the bank. The lady looked at my account, saw where my debit card was declined, but no record of any overdraw. I had $800. Crazy.

I'm having one of those days where nothing's really going quite how I want it to go. I have this project where I have to draft some geology illustrations on the computer. I had a little circus here last night and managed to drop my flash drive in the parking lot. It got run over by a car and is dead as a doornail. So this project that took about 12 hours to draft is gone and I have to start over. I'm supposed to have it done tomorrow. I guess I'm in for a late night.

shockozulu

Gneiss, hope your project went well.

I've been down with the flu. I think its the regular flu not that swine one but I haven't had my flu shot for the first time in ten years as my doctor ran out and won't be getting any more. Been going from shivers to hot-as-he!! the last week. Today was the first day I really felt like doing anything so got the mini-blinds set up over the kitchen in my new home. Also made plans to formally take the course to lead F2F SMART Recovery meetings before the end of the year.

Off to rest again. Even been too sick to play my Nintendo DS so you know this flu has been bad! I even missed a Dodger game. Just hope I don't get sick again today from doing too much yesterday.

Gypsy Feet

glad to hear you are on the mend, will your recovery classes be expensive?

Bamboozle

Hope you're feeling better, Alera.






Bad day for me. Still sober. Have a case of the fvckits but won't do anything at all. I feel really tired...work early....

shockozulu

I'm getting better by the day but did too much yesterday, you know how that goes. I'm going from shivers to hot flashes and back again. People are looking at me weird when I'm walking around in a sweatshirt to the local shopping center (from the shivers).

As for the training, all I have to pay for to take training is the literature etc. for the meetings once they start. The Facilitators handbook is free.

Gypsy Feet

I meant for you me to come to your meeting!!

gneiss

Wow. Chirp chirp... I think I hear crickets in here.

I'm on yet another field trip. I love them. We got rained out of our first 4 stops this morning, the river was too high and we couldn't get to them. Try again tomorrow... I hope it works this time because it's the best fossil collecting available on this trip.

I am fortunate on this trip to have a quiet roommate. She's never been in a bar, she's from China and isn't old enough to drink in her hometown. Everyone else went for a drink tonight. She and I came back to our room; she's studying, I'm about to go to sleep. And I need it after today! 4:30 start this morning. Yuck.

Ya know, I've always known it's best to let bygones by bygones, let go of things because it really is best for me. And I've always been good about it but it's always been fairly petty stuff. I know a girl who literally every time I thought of her for about the last 18 months I've thought how much I hate her. She's been mean to me, attacked me in ways no one else ever has, and it's because she believed some stuff she heard about me and dreamed up about me that has nothing to do with reality. I just got tired of feeling like that (she's a semi-permanent fixture, I really can't get rid of her without losing the few functional friendships I still have). So I emailed her that I was sorry when I had been wrong, didn't expect her to like me but wanted to apologize, and I knew she was in a tough situation and acted on info that wasn't correct. I felt a little better after that, but didn't expect much (she was pretty convinced I slept with her fiance, after all. That would be hard to get over). Next day I was surprised to get an apology back. And while I wouldn't call us friends, we've actually been civil to each other for the last couple days. It's pretty amazing what a simple apology can do.

Bamboozle

My life isn't very exciting.

allport

Mine either Bam

I can post lots of long boring stories about how I did nothing, but it's bad enough that I have to go through it without inflictiing it on others

That sounds pretty negative but I am actually kind of enjoying the calm life I am living at the moment, it won't last long (I can already feel myself getting annoyed with it) but for now I am going with the flow.

Bamboozle

I'm eating....uh....good food for once. Well, better than what I usually eat. I'm actually eating some vegetables right now...ones that came from the freezer...no fat or salt added! Yea! ...but I'm also eating a piece of chicken...eh. I marinated that baby....but I burned it. Oops. I was a little distracted.

Better than the pizza I was going to bake. Maybe I'll bake it later.

gneiss

*Gulp* Is that a hint? :P

shockozulu

Oh, no, they will be free.

Thank goodness I will be training at home. I'm still sick with the flu which has gone to my stomach. My roomie got the chills and head cold part from me and listening to her you'd think she was the only one that is sick. On top of that, you know how you can get really mad at someone and say stuff you can't take back. Well, that's how she's been with this flu. Its not pretty at all here right now.

Overman

One of my clients had the H1N1 and is now fully recovered. I was exposed, but never showed symptoms. My last flu shot was in 2005.

If I don't post again, you all will know what happened.

LOL

Gypsy Feet

sounds delish bam! When I first started weight watchers it was such a chore, but like everything else, after I worked at it for awhile it became habit, and now even when I "cheat" I behave. The last 24 hours have pretty much sucked donkey butt. So I gave myself permission to be as "naughty" as I needed to be, not to pick up. Heres what I came up with, pathetic old boring lady that I am
I wrote a really mean email, and sent it!
I went to the gym and beat the machines up, swam laps, and hot tubbed
I glued broken glass all over an innocent mailbox (pics in my profile)
I made wild rice, and used a little real butter!!
I made a home made milk shake (fat free milk, light ice cream, sugar free white chocolate syrup)
I cleaned the house

I've also bitched, whined and complained lots, but I *think* I am coming out the other side

sober, and maybe not too much fatter

Bamboozle

Oh, yeah...I tend to do that around my monthly bleed.

allport

No it wasn't a hint Gneiss

I always enjoy reading your posts lol leave the paranoia to me I'm an expert

shockozulu

Since I've last posted I've thrown up four times, fallen asleep in the living room (which I never do) and pumped myself full of aspirin and Tylenol to keep the fever down. I'm hoping they don't postpone the Angels/Yankee game as baseball is about all I can follow today. Haven't felt well enough to keep up with my audiobook, so I know I'm sick.

Overman

Alera, I seem to have lost my magic wand, otherwise I'd cure you.

Hope you get better soon.

shockozulu

Picked up a bit last night. Enjoyed watching the new IP (Interview Project) and then made my way over to view Marc Isaacs's Lift and the award winning Apology Line. I do think the Apology Line is extremely over-rated myself. I remember when it was all over the news for being so "innovative'. If one wants to go with that style, I prefer Talk to Me, which is a twenty minute film made up of twenty years of phone messages along with a wonderful collage. If you like mixed media I highly recommend this little film.

I'm not a big fan of Artsy Fartsy stuff but I do love a good documentary, especially short subject. Some of the Lift is a bit to arty at first but then the people in the building really began to grab me. Anyway, that is what I've been doing the last few hours, now if I could get my eight hours.
**Warning...link audio NSFW***