tyler

It was a good day. I'm tired. It's good to be tired from working all day again!! Back to it tomorrow!!

Gypsy Feet

I love that feeling=)

most of the time

gneiss

I'm still not unpacked. I've only got a few more boxes but I'm so tired of unpacking stuff. I decided to take tomorrow off, maybe I just need to veg in front of the TV for a while.

Hope everyone is doing well!

shockozulu

Considering that you are here on the internet its clear you unpacked the most important thing- your computer

Rest up and enjoy the TV.

Gypsy Feet

uhg, my turn to move looks like. Leaving a really bad situation/no friends/bad neighborhood for beautiful santa barbara, but leaving my daughter, my dogs, my jobsite (transfering bases)

Freaking out

gneiss

Indeed, Alera, my computer was never really even boxed up. I just put it in a neoprene sleeve and set it on the front seat of my car. Laptops are awesome that way.

Oh Gypsy, that's too bad you have to move.

I'm pleased with my new apartment. I feel so much more secure knowing the druggies no longer know where I live, even if I do wake up at every little noise! It looks really empty though, I had 3 roommates and lived basically in one room and now have the whole place to myself. On Friday the rest of my furniture should arrive from my aunt's house so perhaps having a couch will help. I have one lonely chair in the living room. *Sigh*

I feel great right now. My mood began to lift a few days before my move, and I wonder if I will go back to being depressed as the "new" wears off my apartment. A friend came up and stocked my apartment with fancy candles from her mom's swanky gift shop so at least it smells pretty! Also another friend is visiting from out of state later this week, and I'm really excited about that. And I went to the chiropractor today, which was weird. I'd never been before. My neck feels great but that's not a profession for body-shy people.

Right now, TV is my anti-drug. Meaning I have no dope money because I bought a flat panel TV. It's really nice! A much better investment than $400 worth of dope, and should last longer, too. Laugh if you want, but I'm going to watch Star Trek in HD now.

Good night!

shockozulu

As a ST fan, I'm not laughing at you. I'm jealous as hell Enjoy your new TV!

gneiss

Thanks, Alera. I'm loving it!

So... here's the annoying thing about moving into a new place: today a (kinda hunky, shirtless) neighbor came over to hand off some mis-delivered mail. And sure enough, I tried a new facial cleanser and am horribly allergic to it. I look like a space alien. *Sigh* So goes my life. I'm drowning my sorrows in all sorts of strangely scented manicure products.

And I guess that severe storm has arrived so I'd better scram.

lunarise

Gneiss..congrats on your move! I think the flat television is a fantastic antidrug as long as you watch some fabulous shows! lol

Still in Mass...visiting...had a fab dinner last night and a card game with the whole family, which I won by the way lol Well everyone except my huzzy because he took off surfing the first chance he could get which I thought was rude to his family but...thats his hula hoop. Im having a great time, a little on the anxious side here and there but..thats what I get for being all reclusive for a while before leaving. anywho have to go

:ghug3

gneiss

My day was going really well until I found out the friend who was going to visit probably won't get to now. I'm sad about it. But... that's another thread. Literally. I posted another thread. Haha.

I got a shock today... like, for real. I was best friends with this girl in high school. We went everywhere, stayed at each others' houses, did make-up, all the standard high school girly stuff. After high school we kinda lost touch, I went away to college, she moved all over Creation and was hard to keep track of. I talked to her on the phone once and visited her one time when I was home maybe 3 or 4 years ago, but in the last ten years that's pretty much all the contact we've had. Our 10-year reunion is coming up and everyone's registering on our class reunion website. So... I got an email today from him (yup... you read that right. Him). I always just thought she was a lesbian or maybe bi (she always joined in with our boy-oogling at the mall, after all). Turns out she was hiding a bit more than that! I just sat there, staring at the computer screen in shock for a while. But hell, he still seems like the same person I was BFFs with in high school so as strange as it is to adjust to that... ok. I emailed back and hope he'll give me a more full account of what else he's been up to for the past years. But... wow. It really was a shock.

mistycshore

Wow, Gneiss, that would give me pause too. Guess you never really know another's insides.

Gypsy, sorry to hear that you have to move but I really hope you enjoy Santa Barbara.

Still breathing here. School starts in a week and half and I just bought my very last notebook for school. Problem is financially we're under a lot of pressure. It seems that I couldn't pay someone to hire me.

Today I'm going to cancel cable and give up the landline in an attempt to curb expenses. It's strange to me that the cell phone is actually cheaper. We were going to try to refinance the house. It's half paid off, but given our obligations and the terrible market (the rep from Wells Fargo said yesterday that they're given fewer loans now than they were in June!), I really doubt that's going to happen.

Anyway, after starting the morning in pretty hopeless state of mind, I had an epiphany: The absolute worst thing that could happen would be bankruptcy. That's not likely to kill us - so it's going to be okay, sooner or later, one way or another.

I hope everyone has a good day.

Daisy09

Hi Misty

Your post made me think of a converstion I had with my husband last night that I had been thinking of sharing...

We were just hanging out and I noticed he wasn't wearing his wedding ring. He leaves it off at home a lot, so I hadn't noticed before. He broke down crying and admitted to me that he had pawned it during his last relapse a few weeks ago. I wasn't angry, but at first I felt odd about not being angry. Then I realized why I wasn't, and I told him: Money and things are just that - money and things. They aren't real. They don't matter. We and our children are clean, clothed and well fed. We have a home to live in, and we are all together and healthy. Everything else is just icing on the cake. I try very hard to be positive as much as I can in any situation. If there's a positive side to my husband's addiction it is this: that I have learned to appreciate things that really matter and not be wrapped up in the things that don't.

Thanks for sharing your epiphany, Misty. I hope you have a good day, too

Love to all,
Daisy

windysan

hello knucklehaids

Zencat

Interesting. I seem to be in a constant flux about my gender identity. I still wounder how much of that was fulling my addiction?

What to say...I never know what to say with this check-in business. Usually I write about whats happen around me and not whats happening within me. So I'll give it a try with whats happen on the inside. Don't know where to start. Maybe I'm just no good at telling what he heck it is I'm feeling...that I don't know how to communicate it. I guess thats a start. I seem to be in a jumble of sorts most of the time and I just cant make heads or tails of it. No wonder I like to practice Zen. It seems to be a hopeless state untangling my thoughts that I focus on the immediateness of now....oh well so much that inside stuff.

...and now for some dancing banana time

gneiss

A lot of the time they are the same for me. Stuff that happens around me triggers a reaction which I then realize is not how I used to react, whether it's before I did drugs or while I did drugs. And that causes me to ask myself a bunch of questions: Do I like this change? Is it helpful/useful to me? Should I watch this to see how it develops? Etc. I've really started watching my reactions to situations and deciding if I should react that way. What's happening around me helps me identify what's going on inside me.

gneiss

2 months.

windysan

shockozulu

Congrats gneiss!! :day2

Bamboozle

I'm here...and I now have to use the facilities.

gneiss

It might be ok. The long-awaited (or dreaded) doctor's appointment was this morning. I went with the intention of sharing info about my drug use. But I started off by listing symptoms (depression, lethargy, fatigue, etc) first and my doctor stopped me and said, "Dry skin?" Yes. "I'm going to have the lab check your thyroid level. It's classic symptoms of low thyroid function." Sure enough, the lab concurs (I've been on meds for that since I was about 11, but haven't changed my dose in years). So I never got to that pesky "Oh by the way I'm a dope head" part of the conversation, and I won't lie: I'm not upset about that. If that doesn't do the trick I guess I'll have to come clean but I thought I'd give it a chance. *Fingers crossed*