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Fantabulous Secular Connections Check-in Part V

Old 06-17-2009, 05:37 AM
  # 301 (permalink)  
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Old 06-17-2009, 06:11 AM
  # 302 (permalink)  
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Mmmmmm, something's cooking in Louisiana.
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Old 06-17-2009, 06:24 AM
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Originally Posted by windysan View Post
Breakfast??
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Old 06-17-2009, 07:55 AM
  # 304 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Daisy09 View Post
Breakfast??
Gumbo!
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Old 06-17-2009, 10:01 AM
  # 305 (permalink)  
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I think I'm finally getting settled in my new apartment. Dang that took long enough . That and a psych med change plus getting out of the apartment despite of my anxiety has helped too. Other than that no major stressor going on so that helps too. Still going to my weekly PTSD group and weekly step meeting (for peer support) along with some inspirational book reading. So there it is, overall I'm in a good place emotionally and recovery wise .
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Old 06-17-2009, 12:26 PM
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Originally Posted by Chardoll View Post
Gumbo!

you are correct
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Old 06-17-2009, 08:52 PM
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Never settle.
 
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Some fun pics from my trip:

Baby fox:


The view from my aunt's back deck in Colorado:


My old friend, Cholla cactus. Last summer I tangled with one of these and had spines in my leg until Christmas.
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Old 06-17-2009, 08:59 PM
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Never settle.
 
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A few more.

A park in Albuquerque:


A lizard in the Sandia mountains:



A nerdy geology picture from around the Jemez Caldera:
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Old 06-17-2009, 09:03 PM
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Where did you see the fox?
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Old 06-17-2009, 09:07 PM
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One more, from last night driving around in the boondocks:



Originally Posted by Gypsy Feet View Post
Where did you see the fox?
A little town in the mountains west of Denver, where my aunt lives. I saw a mama and 3 babies, my aunt said the neighbors have counted as many as 9 babies earlier in the spring but my cousin also saw a bear poking around the fox den so I guess that answers any questions about the missing babies!
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Old 06-17-2009, 09:09 PM
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Originally Posted by windysan View Post
you are correct
My grandmotherr was howw shall we sayy in a not soo offensive way...hmmm.... a K..na$$ ( half french / half american indian )....she couldd make a meal withh just some rice an onion annd whateverr she couldd findd her cabinets. Mostt of my familyy is from La. andd what theyy call Deep East Texas.
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Old 06-18-2009, 12:11 AM
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For anyone who needs cheering up... are you ready?????? For the cutest kitty in the world!!!!!

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Old 06-18-2009, 08:09 AM
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Not all better, getting better
 
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Had a pretty good day yesterday. I was on my way to a job interview for job that I'm pretty interested in when I got a call for another interview for the job I really want!! Been out of work for about a month now and starting to get a bit antsy. My unemployment is volunatary, so my situation is better than most, but it'd still be nice to get some income flowing again.

The interview went very well and they are going to set up a follow up interview on Monday. They said that their hiring process is slow, which actually turns out to be good, as my interview for the job I REALLY want isn't until next Thursday!! I think I'd be happy with either job, they are very similar, both in cell phone sales. The one I really want is a corporate position, which offers more career advancement opportunities, the other is an "agent" which is a small business, but with growth potential.

The best news is that I can pass the drug test for either one!!!! Haven't been able to do that for a long time. It is one of the main factors that kept me working at the $hitty place I spent the last 3 1/2 years at. They didn't drug test, if they did they wouldn't have any employees. Everyone used to joke, "you gotta get high just to take working here!!!" Well I don't work there anymore and I don't get high anymore either. I made my escape!

Been kinda a slow day today. Been hanging out here mostly this morning. Might go for a bike ride later. I'm a bit sore from my workout yesterday, so I'll probably lay off the gym until tomorrow. It seems like I remember reading somewhere you are better working out every other day in order to give your muscles a chance to rebuild before you stress them again. Sounds like good logic anyway!!

Well, that's where I'm at today. Hope everyone else is doing well too. Take care all!
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Old 06-18-2009, 02:24 PM
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fantastic tyler! I find I am much more at peace with less idle time and a paycheck coming in
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Old 06-18-2009, 03:47 PM
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Gypsy Feet, I like your new screen name!!!
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Old 06-19-2009, 06:24 PM
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Been strugling a bit the last couple of nights, really wanting to drink, mostly out of boredom, I think. Last night I literally had the bottle in my hand, but put it down. I just wasn't willing to "go there". My boy is coming up to see me this weekend and even though he doesn't know of my struggles, I wanted to feel proud for him.

They say you have to be able to love yourself before you can really be loved, or something like that. Well, I don't love myself, haven't for a long time, if ever. I'd say I go from completely loathing myself, to being able to stand myself. Love myself?? Not likely.

I'm not really feeling particularly depressed at the moment, though I often do. I take meds for that, but it's been hard to say whether they work or not as I've always "self-medicated" on top of it. I'm just saying how it is. I'm 40 years old and pretty much pissed away the last 20. Not wallowing, just how it is. Hopefully with the new road I'm on and better decision the next 20 will be better than the last, can't really be much worse...well that's not true, there are many far worse off than I, and I should be thankful for what I have.

The urge to drink tonight wasn't as strong as last night, but it was still there. Nights have always been the time to get messed up for me. I've had a hard time getting to sleep since I was a child. Mind just races, won't stop, won't let me drift away. Sometimes I wish I'd just drift away. But that's the easy way out, I've worked my way into the place I am and I have to work out of it.

On a more positive note, I've been working out every other day all week. Feels good. I ride that stationary bike hard, Metalica pounding in my Ipod, sweat dripping from every pore. Did almost 8 miles in a half hour today, not a bad pace for an "old man"!! Lifted some weights afterwards, left feeling sore, but good sore. Took the dog for a 2 mile walk before I worked out, so at least I'm getting my exercise.

I'm rambling here. If anyone has made it this far, please forgive me. I just needed to write some stuff down. I know I can ramble here without anyone telling me I need to go to a meeting. Maybe I should, maybe I will, but for now this helps me. It's kinda like sending a message in a bottle. Even if no one gets it, it is "out there". It doesn't help me as much just writing in a "journal". If you're still here, thanks for listening. Take care.
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Old 06-19-2009, 11:23 PM
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Hello all, just checking in to say that I'm going to visit my kids for a few days. Be good while I'm gone !
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Old 06-21-2009, 09:35 AM
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Tyler I started my recovery journey around my 40th B-Day. I didn't feel so old then...LOL...but I get what your saying. Its never too late to start a lifestyle change that will bring better health. As for the urges and when I get them I go to the SMART website and read through the tools. I like the DISARM tool.
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Old 06-21-2009, 10:25 AM
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Thanks tyler (hug)

I quit at 27 and thought i had wasted so much of my life. Then i drank again for 8 years at age 40...was 48 when i sobered up this time...

No it is never too late to change, and nver too late to learn to love yourself

at 1-3 mos it was very hard to see past the wreckage that i had to wallow through in order for life to change...I was changing, just couldn't see it.

I find the growing in sobriety to be a very slow process...and up and down...

Glad you are journaling ! :praying (thats a joke by the way)
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Old 06-21-2009, 10:27 AM
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Yo!
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