Living in Fear

Old 04-21-2009, 05:06 AM
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Living in Fear

Hello, folks. How are you all doing?

I'm afraid. I've been this way for as long as I can remember.

I read posts from time to time that mention NOT living in fear...about how people refuse to live in fear.

I don't know how to do that and I have to say that Iím jealous of people who donít live this way. I cannot control how I feel...I never could. Iíve tried and Iíve failed miserably.

I'm hoping therapy will help me through it. Iíve been living in a shell for a long time and I want out.

Iím interested in hearing from folks who could not control fear and found a way to manage the fear or get it to disappear.

I donít know where to begin or how.

Itís bad this morningÖI donít want to leave the house, but I will. I have therapy this morning and Iím scared. I know the feeling is ridiculousÖmy therapist is really easy to talk to, but I worry that one time Iíll go in there and sheíll drop me. I hate feeling vulnerable and asking for help. The simple act of going to therapy is bringing out all kinds of old hurts. This sucks.
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Old 04-21-2009, 06:15 AM
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Damn, Bam, I wish I knew how to help. Therapy sounds like a good idea to me. I'm wishing you SuperMegaLuckOfTheBuddha.
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Old 04-21-2009, 07:05 AM
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I've lived in fear plenty during my lifetime. Sometimes it's been so bad that I've bordered on being agoraphobic.

The part of ourselves that clings to the past with its traumas and hurts, and projects into the future with unknown demons lurking keeps us bound in fearful agony.

You are working on getting healthy, Bam. You took action to see a medical doctor and a therapist. You are taking medication to help with this. It's hard to make changes, and almost easier to stay with the fear.

It helps me if I just breathe and stay focused on what's happening right now.

Have a good hour with your therapist. She won't drop you, and you've always got support from SR.

Thinking of you...

and a big hug,

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Old 04-21-2009, 07:35 AM
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I bawled my eyes out today.

I really like my therapist...she's easy to talk to.

I have a lot of thoughts going through my head right now.

She told me that this is my bottom.

I think she's right.

I go to my physical doctor next week...I'm going to talk to him about getting put on a non-habit forming anti-anxiety med and get the dosage on my antidepressant uped.

Can't talk for now...I have to go to work. I'll be back later.

Thanks windy and Donna. Your responses mean a lot.
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Old 04-21-2009, 09:27 AM
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I don't have any advice just hope you are feeling better.

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Old 04-21-2009, 12:48 PM
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Bam I just wanted to encourage you to keep seeking healthy ways to cope with your fear. It helps me to just recognize that some days are more challenging than others with anxiety. I do my best not to judge my anxiety but just recognize that it comes and then it dose go.
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Old 04-21-2009, 03:02 PM
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Hi Bam I can relate as Ive been very fearful of some things lately, well not just lately, for a long time. Sometimes I dont know if my fears are justified or not, am I just creating them or are they a real threat? Speaking with a therapist can help work through these issues, addics/alcoholics tend to overanalyze and make mountains out of molehills sometimes imo, at least I do. The world is a scary place, no doubt, but we gotta trudge through the best we can. big hugs!
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Old 04-21-2009, 08:50 PM
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Seeing a therapist is a HUGE positive step, Bam! Yay, You!
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