Triggers and coping strategies

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Old 04-13-2009, 11:12 PM
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people, movies, television, the basement, my parents, the idea of socializing, the worries of finding a job and going to college, feeling like I'm missing out and never being able to drink again. this is my first go at quitting so its all extremely new.. all of this facing life business

I've been exercising, reading and writing all that good stuff. Bad insomnia still though
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Old 04-14-2009, 03:55 AM
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Originally Posted by Freepath View Post
Coping:
I have a list. Here are some of the problems with alcohol as it relates to your health:
Addiction greatly increases the chance of cirrhosis, pancreatitis, hypertension, malaise, obesity, REM sleep disruption, limbic brain damage, frontal lobe brain damage, certain types of cancer, and cerebral hemorrhage. People who drive with a BAC of 0.1% are 3-15 times more likely to be involved in a fatal car accident.
This is ironic. Working hard is also a coping mechanism. If I work 80 hours this week, I will not have time to drink alcohol. I’ll need my sleep. If I drink, I know I will wake up at 3:00 AM for at least an hour, and I will wake up feeling too tired to even function.
Aerobic exercise. There is a common belief among runners that there is a runner’s high. I absolutely believe this. It doesn’t even have to be running, but anything that brings my heart rate up and keeps it there for a while can cause this feeling. To me, it’s the greatest feeling in the world.
I think of my children. I don’t want them to see me when I drink. I don’t want them to drink. I’m afraid that they will be like me. I can’t have just one. I can have way too much, and I only want more.
Wow! Thanks for all the info! 80 hours a week? Wow! What a hard working person you are! I cannot imagine that. I lived in the Bay Area and thought I had it bad with 70 hour weeks, but this included 20 hours of commute time each week. Sad thing is, I always found time to drink - like round the clock each weekend. Sounds like you are doing great.

BTW, can I post this link? (Alera, pls. delete if not appropriate but I just think it's useful to see. Thanks!) Here is a brain on alcohol over many years. Notice all the big holes in it? This is NOT normal.

Rotating SPECT Images | Amen Clinics

Also, this site has brain spects from even drinking coffee and smoking and then before and after pics of active using versus the brain healing. Really puts things into perspective for me! One other little thing, I did call this place as I wanted to get one of these done to inject reality for me, but it was too expensive and not trying to promote this place. I just find it useful to look at things from a scientific perspective.
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Old 04-14-2009, 12:51 PM
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Originally Posted by allport View Post
What game Jamdls?
It's called F Bomb it's a solitary word game similar to Scrabble
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Old 04-16-2009, 08:19 AM
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Hey all, can you help me out today please? As I mentioned in another thread, I have to come up with all of these coping strategies before my group tonight. I am somewhat limited in my thinking, as alcohol has been my only coping strategy, for the most part. So here is what I've come up with so far: work out, call a friend, go on SR, clean my house, cook something for the freezer, watch TV, read a book.

Any other ideas? Thanks in advance.
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Old 04-16-2009, 08:37 AM
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Well, I tend to eat to cope (Bad!) I walk the dog, I garden, I read, I do dance steps to music, and that's all I can think of for now...oh yeah there's the computerit's full of information, I've been reading up on that "fly lady", I like that.
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Old 04-16-2009, 08:52 AM
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Originally Posted by californiapoppy View Post
Well, I tend to eat to cope (Bad!) I walk the dog, I garden, I read, I do dance steps to music, and that's all I can think of for now...oh yeah there's the computerit's full of information, I've been reading up on that "fly lady", I like that.
Thanks! I forgot about flylady but that is very good and productive. I think developing a hobby like gardening is very good. In fact, I've not fertilized my citrus or roses for a year or more (not really gardening though). I would like to started a potted plant garden or a vegetable garden, but right now I can't afford too much. I really do need to start walking the dogs but, with two of them, I can't walk them at the same time, as they don't know how to do this. I confess they've turned into little monsters.
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Old 04-16-2009, 09:01 AM
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Hi again Katie,

In the beginning, I used to "LAY DOWN" haha. I did.... and it worked.

Swim, Yoga, (you have a pool, I think you mentioned?), went to a bookstore, got the paper and went to a Starbucks to read it and have tea. Read cookbooks and tried recipes I hadn't tried (changed focus and felt accomplishment) At one point in time, I decided I was going to make pastry doe for pies and prefect it, I'm still working on that one, but they're edible now. I would call a friend who wasn't in AA so I could distract myself from the subject of alcohol. I would walk, walk and keep walking (Love to walk)
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Old 04-16-2009, 09:15 AM
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Off the top of my head I do some of the following. Learn and/or practice some; relaxation techniques, meditation, or self-soothing. Listen to a MP3 guided imagery mediation or Dharma talk.
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Old 04-16-2009, 09:17 AM
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Originally Posted by gerryP View Post
Hi again Katie,

In the beginning, I used to "LAY DOWN" haha. I did.... and it worked.

Swim, Yoga, (you have a pool, I think you mentioned?), went to a bookstore, got the paper and went to a Starbucks to read it and have tea. Read cookbooks and tried recipes I hadn't tried (changed focus and felt accomplishment) At one point in time, I decided I was going to make pastry doe for pies and prefect it, I'm still working on that one, but they're edible now. I would call a friend who wasn't in AA so I could distract myself from the subject of alcohol. I would walk, walk and keep walking (Love to walk)
Hi again to you!

Excellent ideas. I guess I just always forget there are a number of things to do. I got an aircard for my computer specifically so I could go to Starbucks and go online but have never done so. I have around 200 cookbooks and may get my interest back in that soon. Laying down is wonderful too. I should be walking as soon it won't be possible due to the high temps here. Yes, I have a pool but haven't used it more than a handful of times in the past four years, but may do so this summer if I buy a new thing to float on (my little dog drowned in my pool four years ago so it's been tough to use. In fact, I won't even maintain it myself, but I digress). Thanks for all these ideas!
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Old 04-16-2009, 09:18 AM
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Originally Posted by zencat View Post
Off the top of my head I do some of the following. Learn and/or practice some; relaxation techniques, meditation, or self soothing. Listen to a guided imagery mediation MP3 or Dharma talk.
Yeah, thanks! My therapist suggested I do Yoga, but I'm intimidated to do that. But I could buy one of those CDs to do the guided imagery stuff.
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Old 04-16-2009, 09:26 AM
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Oh thought of another good one I love to do. Admire nature. I like to walk out on the local pier and this time of year do some wale watching. Wales are cool
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Old 04-16-2009, 09:34 AM
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Originally Posted by zencat View Post
Oh thought of another good one I love to do. Admire nature. I like to walk out on the local pier and this time of year do some wale watching. Wales are cool
Oh, I am so jealous! I used to LOVE walking on the beach when I lived in CA and have never seen a whale. There is no nature here to admire IMHO. The desert and cacti just don't cut it for me, although I do love the rustling of palm trees and will sit outside when it's windy and just listen to the leaves. That is very relaxing to me and I will add walking around this little lake here to the list I am writing down, based on all your great ideas!
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Old 04-16-2009, 10:26 AM
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If I could pipe in on your original post Zencat.

Katie why do you feel intimidated? Start in a beginners class where everyone new to Yoga is and you all loose your balance and fall of your perch together. That's what I did with everyone else. I also found being with other people a great break. I wanted to feel "part of this world" not "of this world". I think getting out as much as your comfortable with, will do you the world of good. But push yourself a little at first and soon, you will never be home. hahhaa
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Old 04-16-2009, 10:34 AM
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Originally Posted by gerryP View Post
If I could pipe in on your original post Zencat.

Katie why do you feel intimidated? Start in a beginners class where everyone new to Yoga is and you all loose your balance and fall of your perch together. That's what I did with everyone else. I also found being with other people a great break. I wanted to feel "part of this world" not "of this world". I think getting out as much as your comfortable with, will do you the world of good. But push yourself a little at first and soon, you will never be home. hahhaa
LOL, you've reminded me of the roots of this I think as to why I'm intimidated. Could it be because I was the last one to finish the 50 yard dash? Could not climb the rope? Wiped out on the tow line skiing and held everyone up? My nickname was Swifto? The last one to be chosen for the team? I can laugh at it now, but it wasn't funny back then. Anyway, it's all good. This is why I only do solitary "sports."
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Old 04-16-2009, 10:40 AM
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Ok, thank you all so much for your input. If anyone has other ideas they are most welcome. So, as a compilation of all your great ideas that I can do (and you can too if these things fit for you), here it is:

Coping strategies:

Flylady, make lists, organize
Walk dogs
Learn about gardening and take care of plants
Lay down.
Bookstore
Starbucks or similar place
Cookbooks and cook something – sense of accomplishment
Guided imagery CD
Walk
Admire nature
Walk around little lake
Send out three resumes a day – no more
Go to SMART
Go on SR
Clean house
Work out
Beading
Costco
Thrift stores, window shop
Sleep
Watch TV
Read a book
Political talk radio and podcasts
Get rid of "stuff", declutter, and load car and drive to donation place
Anything in that “100 things to do” as found on SR.
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Old 04-16-2009, 10:58 AM
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LOL Katie.

You are probably right about where that fear comes from, but that was then and this is now.

Anyway, the older I become, the more I realize that no one is laughing at anyone anymore. It seems if I find anything 1/2 funny (which I don't anymore) I remind myself that I'm just behind them a couple years. Eek. Not funny at all anymore.
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Old 04-16-2009, 01:14 PM
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OH!!!

I don't know how I forgot this one!

Journaling...

I journal every night and sometimes during the day. For me, it's a great way to organize my thoughts on what I'm feeling. By writing it down, I can pour it all out, swear if i need to and do....(so what) It helps me to see where my feelings are coming from. What is the REAL reason I'm feeling this way. Often it's NOT about what I attach it to, then I can look at it from another angle.
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:02 PM
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Originally Posted by gerryP View Post
OH!!!

I don't know how I forgot this one!

Journaling...

I journal every night and sometimes during the day. For me, it's a great way to organize my thoughts on what I'm feeling. By writing it down, I can pour it all out, swear if i need to and do....(so what) It helps me to see where my feelings are coming from. What is the REAL reason I'm feeling this way. Often it's NOT about what I attach it to, then I can look at it from another angle.
Great point! I forgot that too. I think what I am going to do is to start a journal online at home, as I type much better than I write.
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Old 04-16-2009, 10:11 PM
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Ok, I went to my group tonight. AA is a HUGE trigger for me in terms of wanting to pick up a drink. People can argue with that all they want, but it is what it is. Two new people start next week and I am just praying (well, not exactly) that they will be like me (of a secular bent or at least not interested in AA), as I am outnumbered already. Anyway, I just sort of shut down and get real quiet when in a situation like that. I just want to get up and walk out and I might have to for my own sanity. Can anyone help me to deal with this? Has anyone ever heard that saying the cure is worse than the sickness? That is how I feel in this minute. In fact, tonight I was reading my assignment on triggers and coping strategies and I intentionally did NOT mention AA is a trigger for me, as I didn't want to alienate everyone in the group. So I am avoiding saying how I really feel in the group's interest, but it sure isn't in my best interest. Thoughts maybe?

LOL, on top of this I have two adorable shih tzu puppies pooping all over my house who then want to eat said poop! Ahhhhhhhhh! Sorry, TMI?
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Old 04-16-2009, 10:22 PM
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Shih Tzus eat poop? I mean, really... they name a breed Shih Tzu and wonder about such things?

Dunno about AA, I just thought I'd chime in about journaling. I love it. I don't journal every night, but fairly often. I use it when I need it, sometimes I'll skip an entire month, sometimes I'll scribble ten pages in a night.

And I mean actual journals, not typing it into my laptop. There's something about actually writing it out that is ten times better than typing for me. It gets it out of my system, and it's in my own handwriting so it's more personal. I feel more connected to it when I wrote it down. In my mind typing is for formal documents, things my prof is about to read. Notes to friends and journals should always be handwritten when possible.
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