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How have I managed to feel like I don't fit in?

Old 03-21-2009, 12:00 PM
  # 41 (permalink)  
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That is the good news about the men's forum. The bad news is it is mostly free of posts. I hope I don't get in trouble for this but the last two hot topics were do you tip your hairstylist and what toys did you have as a kid. My apologies to all the men that want all the women to think we discuss important stuff.
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Old 03-21-2009, 12:06 PM
  # 42 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Phaleron View Post
I guess we're kind of lucky in that the men's forum is mostly free from religion :P



I noticed that. Yes. I'll admit: I was too curious one day, had to see what was going on over in the men's forum. Give me this: I at least managed to log off before I went for a visit. I occasionally see guys lurking around the ladies' forum. Geez, at least log out so we can't see you in there! Curiosity satisfied, read nothing unexpected, and decided to stay out, as the board requests.
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Old 03-21-2009, 12:20 PM
  # 43 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Phaleron View Post
I guess we're kind of lucky in that the men's forum is mostly free from religion; Yet another reason why I'm thankful to The Unmoved Mover for making me a man! :P

I feel an attack of penis envy coming on
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Old 03-21-2009, 03:39 PM
  # 44 (permalink)  
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TSH - I miss reading your posts because I feel like I identify with a lot of what you say and how you are feeling.

I am feeling the "SR Funk" that people are expressing.
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Old 03-21-2009, 03:52 PM
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Originally Posted by yeahgr8 View Post
That said i have been listening to old school rave all day, altern8, 808state, prodigy, together...can anyone hear lay a claim that they can dance properly to rave music?

Kind of on the 80's posts theme...
I used to love all that stuff. I was 19 in 1988 when it was all starting, I was never a hard-core raver but I went most weekends for a year or two and I can still get an ecstacy rush if I listen to the old tunes. I am sure I danced very badly, lol.
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Old 03-21-2009, 05:24 PM
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What is SR Funk anyone?
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Old 03-21-2009, 05:55 PM
  # 47 (permalink)  
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Hey, TSH. I want you to know that I do value your posts.



I haven't been feeling the love at SR for a couple of months now. I've been having a rough time of things lately, so my perspective is clouded by that. I know I cannot speak for anyone else here, but I do find it curious that there are many others who aren’t pleased.

It may be time for me to move on. I don't know what to do next…there is a lot of uncertainty in my life.

One thing I do know is that I’m at my breaking point. Things are incredibly stressful…and sometimes being here does not help. That wasn’t always the case. Maybe I need to find another way.
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Old 03-21-2009, 06:09 PM
  # 48 (permalink)  
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Bam~ First of all I"m happy to see you =) Your post resonated BIG TIME with me. I used to come here and smile, enjoy reading, enjoy posting. I can't say I feel that way anymore and it makes me kinda sad. Thing is, like you, I also have this weight on my shoulders in real life that I can't seem to get off. I used to be able to come here and talk, try and get things sorted out. I don't feel that I can do that anymore. Why? I honestly can't pinpoint why, I just know it's how I feel.
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Old 03-21-2009, 06:28 PM
  # 49 (permalink)  
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Oh right i see what it is, all the AA/Not AA, God/not God stuff like TSH said. Yeah i bought into that, wish i hadn't, won't do it again! It's all a load of **** anyway! Only thing that matters is staying sober however you can do it, man this sucks that i am writing this, didn't realise it was affecting people so bad...hope no-one really leaves:ghug
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Old 03-21-2009, 06:38 PM
  # 50 (permalink)  
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Hm. Don't know. When I haven't found a thread useful or occasionally even detrimental, I just stay off it (mostly anyway. Sometimes I'm too opinionated for my own good). That way all the AA/non-AA, God/no God stuff doesn't bother me unless I want it to.

But I admit sometimes I'm pretty oblivious to people. I spent a long time putting up an emotional wall, and darned if I'm taking it down now! j/k
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Old 03-21-2009, 08:14 PM
  # 51 (permalink)  
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TSH, it's ALWAYS good to see your posts. You're always so positive and upbeat!

I do agree that things can be cyclical (how the heck do you spell that, anyway?!).

The 'drama' may be throwing you off, too. I tend to want to go bulldozing through it, because I feel trolls are taking advantage of the feelings of really good people by stoking the fires. Now that makes me crazy. So far, I've kept my mouth shut....or fingers quiet, as the case may be.
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Old 03-21-2009, 11:53 PM
  # 52 (permalink)  
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I'm bringing all this up for two reasons, I suppose. First, I hate to see SR suffer in any way because I've seen first-hand what a true asset it can be to those in need of support. Secondly, I'm reaching a point where I could really use some shoulders to lean on and I don't know if those shoulders will still be there for me. Selfish, I'm sorry, but necessary.

My time right now is limited and my stupid n key is giving me trouble on the laptop so I'm going to cut this short for now. I hope some of you are still willing to discuss this more tomorrow.

Love you.
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Old 03-22-2009, 07:30 AM
  # 53 (permalink)  
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There are very few absolutes in life (unless you are talking about the vodka ). But one absolute I am SURE of, is SR. So, get that 'n' key fixed and have a go at us!

Hope you are feeling better.
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Old 03-22-2009, 08:40 AM
  # 54 (permalink)  
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I look forward to your posts also TSH and miss you if you miss a day.
I was thinking to myself maybe I am posting things that are making people less wanted and if that is the case it saddens me too.
Like you, I also want to fit in.
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Old 03-22-2009, 01:39 PM
  # 55 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by TryingSoHard View Post
I hope some of you are still willing to discuss this more tomorrow.

Love you.
Absolutly. My therapist has suggested AA to me and I've told her I can't do it...and she insists it's vital for me to have support from other addicts. I know this...I just have a hard time with the "people" thing. Everyone (in all aspects of my life) is getting on my nerves. *sigh*

I would like for this place to be what it always has been to me...but I get the feeling that's not the way things are going to go. Perhaps the change is in me. I do not know.
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Old 03-22-2009, 04:59 PM
  # 56 (permalink)  
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I think with aa / god being so prevalent in treatment for alcohol problems, and that this forum is mainly used by secular / agnostic / atheist types, there's bound to be the occasional discussion about it, but i'm sure no-one means to upset or offend anyone...

:ghug
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Old 03-22-2009, 05:43 PM
  # 57 (permalink)  
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It's not the occasional discussion, spark. And by no means am I trying to say that I don't want to hear anything about God or AA, or that I begrudge those who use that as their recovery program. It's not even about that.

It's the constant bickering, the intolerance, the downright insulting nature of a lot of the discussions lately (and by lately I mean the past 2 months, at least).

I shouldn't complain about not fitting in, now that I put it like that. I don't WANT to fit in with stuff like that.

But also there are the other threads and people who take no part in all of that nonsense, and I still don't feel like I fit in with them, either. I don't know what changed. There are still people here who I feel incredibly connected to and who are very important to me. For some reason I just feel out of place posting here. Part of me feels like the things I say aren't important and won't be of help to anyone anyway.

I'm not even making sense right now. I don't know what I'm trying to say so I'll just quit typing.
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Old 03-22-2009, 05:55 PM
  # 58 (permalink)  
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TSH, in my own way, I do understand.
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Old 03-22-2009, 06:02 PM
  # 59 (permalink)  
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I feel different...I can't put my finger on it. I'm not sure what's changed, but it is significant. I need to think on this more.

I'm at a fork in the road? Maybe I'm at a turning point? Anymore clichés that fits that I'm not thinking of right now?
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Old 03-22-2009, 06:06 PM
  # 60 (permalink)  
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I'm a little angry and I don't care what people think of me when I post. I cared before...and because of that I was fairly guarded. This does me no good. I'll see how people react...and then I'll decide what to do.

I need a place to VENT. If I can't vent here, then what good is this place? I've read threads in which the OP was chastised for simply venting. How discouraging. I feel sorry for the OP's. You know, sometimes you just have to get it out and not hear the negativity....not hear the "one ups".
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