SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/)
-   Secular Connections (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/secular-connections/)
-   -   getting a bit cross now.. (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/secular-connections/169036-getting-bit-cross-now.html)

Coolmummy 02-11-2009 07:10 AM

getting a bit cross now..
 
...as every other post, it seems, on the newcomers board has a reference to AA. What's that all about? I want to post on there but don't want it rammed down my neck with every reply!

least 02-11-2009 07:19 AM

I'm glad you didn't run into Tomas in the Alcoholism forum yesterday! That was truly the "love from hell"!

Fubarcdn 02-11-2009 07:22 AM

I know what you mean. Seems like a couple of the hard core AA'ers want to push their beliefs on every thread and start extra ones on top of that. Have you tried using the ignore button to filter out the people you don't want to hear from?
I think a lot of these people do AA more harm than they do good. I might start sticking to here and the daily support threads I follow.

Mariposa18 02-11-2009 07:34 AM

Hi Guys~ First time posting in this forum:c009: The past few days I've noticed so many threads that are, well to put it nicely, just plain ANNOYING! I find myself not even reading half of the posts because they either p*ss me off or make me feel utterly depressed! Is it just me? And I know AA is good and all, BUT ITS NOT THE ONLY WAY! Geez, it's like people who think their religion is the only one that exists! I don't like being forced fed ANYTHING much less how I should be sober, you know?

Ananda 02-11-2009 07:53 AM

Haven't been reading much, but i would say to be a little careful about this...as in...

There are an awful lot of people at SR that found their sobriety through AA and they are going to and in fact should be sharing their expreinces with it. I guess I don't think expereinces are wrong or right.

I know sometimes people get into the my way is right thing, but then i've seen many a non-aaer get into the total slamming of aaers as well.

SR is a good place for me to practice dealing with these issues in a better way than I used to...

I think the voice of reason will eventually be heard over the screaming reaction from whichever road to recovery we find :Val004:

Mariposa18 02-11-2009 08:07 AM

I'm not knocking AA by any means and I hope it didn't sound that way. I just don't see why start several thread with the SAME post, kwim? I know AA is a wonderful program and has saved many lives. But it just seems like the past few days there has been an inundation of posts and they sound so preachy and "this is the only way". Like I said, maybe it's just me. I seem to be overly sensitive lately....

But it's not only the AA posts to me. I've also read several posts that make me want to come through the screen and shake some people! lol

Yeah, okay I sound like a complainer! Maybe what *I* need is to get off the computer! lol

doorknob 02-11-2009 08:16 AM

It's okay to blow off a little steam. Just remember, it's not always what you say, but how you say it...

And IMO, this thread has been fine. :)

Ananda 02-11-2009 08:23 AM

naw....this threads going fine...sorry maraposi! Its just something i've been thinking about cause I think all of us have done a super job of just expressing ourselves lately :)

Whining is a necessary incrediant for sobriety...I think i get a little prickly sometimes due to my own insecurities......

Don't you dare leave the comuputer!!!!! who would there be to talk to all day without you :ghug3

Coolmummy 02-11-2009 10:26 AM

I'm sorry - I know a lot of people find AA the 'only thing' , but when I first posted i said i didn't think it was right for me and immediately got slammed for 'dismissing' it without trying it, and told pretty much that it was not possible to do it alone. This kind of hurt me as I didn't come here to be told what my choice of getting sober would be, but for some support and mutual help!! I do feel that a lot of the forums are taken over by AA'ers and anyone who dares disagree, is treated rather unfairly. True I haven't tried AA, but I feel that I personally know enough about it for me to know it isn't right for me, but should I tell people this? Should I slam them for their choices? Tell them the reasons I hate the 'fellowship' (and they are good ones!) No, I wouldn't dream of it!

Sorry for rant.

Rant over. Thank you

Ananda 02-11-2009 10:33 AM

yeah...it makes me sad when i see that happen coolmummy :( And I have seen it happen.

I love SR and don't feel that utilizing SR can quite be called "doing it on our own"

Glad for all the voices here :Xmasrstar

Fubarcdn 02-11-2009 11:59 AM


Originally Posted by ananda (Post 2103957)
yeah...it makes me sad when i see that happen coolmummy :( And I have seen it happen.

I love SR and don't feel that utilizing SR can quite be called "doing it on our own"

Glad for all the voices here :Xmasrstar

This is a new age when people are as comfortable and connected with internet relations as they are with Face to face. I personally prefer this and I consider you all my friends and support.

I think, if you put your time in here this can work as well as anything for the support and fellowship part of your recovery.
Of course we also have to work an improvement and retribution part into our recovery also. I haven't gotten to that part except for sincerely apologizing to the ones I have done the most damage too but I will. I have read the secular 12 steps and think that somewhere within those is the answer. Maybe it is only 4-5 steps or whatever but it is different for each of us.
What we must not do is let narrow minded people get us down. We are too smart for that.

shockozulu 02-11-2009 12:06 PM

Until recently, the only programs available for alcoholics and addicts were AA and NA. Because of this, it makes sense that the majority of folks at SR work the twelve steps.

Also, remember that part of their program teaches that one must work a program to get and stay clean. Although we might not agree with their opinions, they are trying to help us get and remain clean and sober.

Hopefully as SMART, LifeRing/SOS, and other secular programs continue to grow we will see more folks speaking about their ESH (Experience, Strength and Hope) with these programs to new members.

Rob B 02-11-2009 12:22 PM

I'm a hardcore AA guy, that being said, I don't believe for a second it is the only way, it is the best way for some of us, it is the best way for me. Maybe you are reading threads I don't see. We have had some over the top AA folks lately, one individual in particular. I actually agreed with him but I thought his delivery needed work. I have been guilty of pushing AA in the past, I don't do that anymore. Seeing right here on SR that secular recovery can be done is convincing proof. SO, if we just stick to sharing what we did, and respect other people's experiences who walk different paths, I imagine it will work out.

Coolmummy 02-11-2009 12:48 PM

Thank you.

windysan 02-11-2009 12:56 PM


Originally Posted by Rob B (Post 2104075)
I'm a hardcore AA guy, that being said, I don't believe for a second it is the only way, it is the best way for some of us, it is the best way for me. Maybe you are reading threads I don't see. We have had some over the top AA folks lately, one individual in particular. I actually agreed with him but I thought his delivery needed work. I have been guilty of pushing AA in the past, I don't do that anymore. Seeing right here on SR that secular recovery can be done is convincing proof. SO, if we just stick to sharing what we did, and respect other people's experiences who walk different paths, I imagine it will work out.

You were an AA pusher? Tell me it ain't so ! Glad to see that you are now more open to other paths. Well said, Rob.

tellus 02-13-2009 05:41 AM

I'm glad it's not just me! There's a couple members recently who make me really uncomfortable in Newcomers. AA is wonderful, but I don't like being beaten over the head with it.

nelco 02-13-2009 06:18 AM

coolmummy I take what I like and leave the rest. no one can make you do anything. I go to AA it works for me,and i like to keep an open mind on how other people get recovery in their lives , only yesterday doorknob enlightened me on another thread ..on how another form of recovery works for him.I think people share their experience ESH and thats a good thing. If it works use it if it does not then leave it. I also find
when i am uncomfortable with something here its more about me than the thread... words are only words...


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:26 PM.