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Fantabulous Secular Connections Check-in Part III

Old 02-13-2009, 02:37 AM
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Hi Nands, don't you answer your PMs anymore? *cough*
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Old 02-13-2009, 04:32 AM
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My first post in her.

Is this where the "non-Godders" come to chat? If so, I'm in.

On day 25 and coasting along decently. I have noticed some minor mood swings, but I have ad them before just as a part of my life and I realize that they are irrational so can keep from lashing out.

TSH - Give him a little time to absorb the info from the meeting. My wife has recently started going and she has a few hard hitting revelations about herself and my addiction. She learned that it wasn't all me and that she had been helping fuel my problem as well. Maybe that's what your hubby is going through and it's a shock. If you guys have a good relationship, he'll talk when he's ready.
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Old 02-13-2009, 05:29 AM
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Welcome to the secular side of SR, Strangef8!
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Old 02-13-2009, 07:21 AM
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Originally Posted by TryingSoHard View Post
Well now, Fub, what if 10 other people are sitting around saying exactly the same thing? How's the group ever going to get bigger if people won't go?

Silly man... :ghug
I knew somebody would say that. I guess I just have to bother to be bothered. Thanks for calling me out. Right now it is just more comfortable to hang with you peeps.
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Old 02-13-2009, 07:34 AM
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so how about a secular approach to friday the 13th?????

I've started this one out with a real doozy of a set up.....
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Old 02-13-2009, 07:42 AM
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Ha ha, nands....I'm already having a good day so far. Can you believe it? I have bills due shortly...I made a phone call......and my case is pending for charity/discount. I don't have to send in any money right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yippy fer skippy! Even if they give me squat, I can still make monthly payments, so everything is cool.


Happy day all.
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Old 02-13-2009, 08:31 AM
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Checkin in...Has anyone else had like delayed withdrawl mood swings and such? I have been a mess the past few days and until this am wasnt able to shake it, mood swings, anxiety etc. Ever heard of it?
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Old 02-13-2009, 08:37 AM
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I have been having a lot of mood swings since I quit. I had these when I was a drinker too though. I think it is good to try to figure out what is the real cause of these swings and try to work on correcting the root problem. I know I get them when people say or do something that ticks me off but I think there is something underneath that makes me react by changing my mood.
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Old 02-13-2009, 08:49 AM
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Old 02-13-2009, 09:21 AM
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Originally Posted by Bamboozle View Post


Is your sister okay? Maybe she has something going on right now and is taking it out on you? I don't know...I'm sorry, gneiss.
My sister is "normal," for her. She's always got something to complain about but it gets really frustrating to me because about 75% of the time I am what she complains about, and a lot of it is stuff that she's basically made up. And she's bi-polar. Before she was diagnosed (when we were kids) she used to beat me up for no apparent reason but now she has medication. It's weird because she's still kind of mean a lot but acts like she wants to be my best friend. And doesn't quite get why I'm just not interested.
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Old 02-13-2009, 01:22 PM
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gneiss.....
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Old 02-13-2009, 01:46 PM
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Originally Posted by Strangef8 View Post
TSH - Give him a little time to absorb the info from the meeting. My wife has recently started going and she has a few hard hitting revelations about herself and my addiction. She learned that it wasn't all me and that she had been helping fuel my problem as well. Maybe that's what your hubby is going through and it's a shock. If you guys have a good relationship, he'll talk when he's ready.
Welcome to Secular, Strange!! :ghug3

Last week, when hub went to his first meeting, he was in a good mood when he got home and around 11:00 decided to spill it and tell me everything about how the meeting went (so, after about 2 hours). Sure, in those 2 hours I was curious and a bit anxious, but I was determined to just sit patiently and wait for him to bring it up... and he did. But it was a little easier because his mood was good. Last night when he got home he seemed... not sure how to describe it... borderline upset. Almost like he felt physically ill. His tone of voice and body language suggested he was not happy. I asked him twice, over about an hour, if everything was ok, if he was ok, and he said yes, so I left it alone. He never wound up saying one single word about the meeting last night. NOTHING. Not even, "It sucked, I won't be going back" or "It was ok, I'll tell you more later". NOTHING. So of course my mind is working overtime imagining all the various horrible things he said and heard that made him not want to tell me anything about it.

Our Valentine's "date night" is tonight since we couldn't get reservations for tomorrow. We'll see how that goes. It's been a while since the two of us have been out alone.

Anyway, again, Welcome to Secular.
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Old 02-13-2009, 01:47 PM
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Originally Posted by Fubarcdn View Post
I knew somebody would say that. I guess I just have to bother to be bothered. Thanks for calling me out.
LOL! You're welcome!!

:ghug
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Old 02-13-2009, 02:32 PM
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Quick update: hub just emailed me and said last night's meeting wasn't as good as last week's. Said they picked a topic from some book to discuss and it was something that didn't really apply to him. He did, however, buy a book at the meeting last night and said he's going to try to have it read by next week's meeting.
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Old 02-13-2009, 02:58 PM
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Cool TSH. Thank him from me for supporting the economy.
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Old 02-13-2009, 03:53 PM
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Oh we'll be supporting the economy in a good way in about 3 hours! LOL

It just occurred to me that this will be our first time going to this restaurant since I stopped drinking. I don't *think* I'm freaked out about it... it will be weird to not order a nice bottle of wine there, but... I am pretty sure I'm ok with it. It will just be different.
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Old 02-13-2009, 04:07 PM
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Have fun on tour "date". I am sitting by my computer eating take out and Dr Pepper. The sugarless diet is on hold for another week. I slipped.
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Old 02-13-2009, 04:20 PM
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well....it was the friday the 13th to beat all friday the 13ths.

Really just getting the concequenses of my own actions. Not feeling terribly ok at the moment. Will be working all weekend ... should be able to slip a little SR in as i expect to put at least 20 hours in, and have had to cancel the visit to see my son....he is not real pleased about that. I refused to talk to my mom and asked him to tell her...there is too much stress right now and i don't need to be talking to her, or my sponsor, or anyone that is going to make me feel any worse about things than i already do.

I will find someway to get through things. Just wish I didn't make my own life so hard sometimes. In theory I will learn how to not volunterily dig my own grave and jump in......living sober with the consequenses long enough should cure me of that habit.

So I am going to give myself 45 minites at the most to feel sorry for myself, which believe me I don't deserve then pull myself together and do something about the mess I've created.

fubar you are absolutely right..we must get down to the root of our problems...otherwise there wouldn't be much point in being sober now would there
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Old 02-13-2009, 04:22 PM
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Nands, you ok? Anything I can help with?

:ghug3
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Old 02-13-2009, 05:40 PM
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Thx (hug) I thought you had a date!!!!!! you better get ready girl!

I'll be ok..had a good cry and now I shall tackle my work problem head on...
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