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Non-Christian Newcomer Looking for Advice

Old 09-04-2008, 09:06 PM
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Question Non-Christian Newcomer Looking for Advice

While I am new to this site I chose this discussion group, as I do not wish to begin a religious debate when looking for the best way to deal with what I am going through as the sister of a drug addict.

I have heard about NarAnon's connections to Scientology and balk a bit at the AlAnon's 12 steps referring to God.

What I AM interested in is finding a pro-active way that I can express and process my emotions (and dreams) related to my brother's addition and the effect it has had on my family, most especially ME.

I am happy to begin online discussions, but I am also interested in finding a group of some sort where I feel comfortable coming 'as I am' (baptised or not). I have tried one-on-one traditional therapy, and I missed the group connection.

Can anyone provide advice on where they have felt safe going in the community for support?

Thank you SO MUCH
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Old 09-05-2008, 12:23 AM
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Just a wee background from me first-----I worked both the AA and NA programs as an Atheist (yes, there's a lot of 'God' mentioned in both, but it can be done as an Atheist.....not only I, but most of my close friends in recovery, we all got clean/sober w/o the use of any external, supernatural.....etc. HP, whether called 'God' or not.

Now, as for the 'friends and families of.....' you wrote....."

"...I have heard about NarAnon's connections to Scientology and balk a bit at the AlAnon's 12 steps referring to God..."

I used to get NarAnon confused with Scientology's recovery groups, which are called.....: NarConon (matter o fact, I just had to do a quick look-up just to make sure I got them put in their proper places).

I've kinda touched on the 'God' part of the AA/NA programs, and I believe that their sister programs, both Alanon and Naranon, can be worked as Atheists, or Agnostics, or Theists.....or any beliefs in-between..... (o:

Perhaps you could give either one or both of these a shot....? Heck, I'll bet that even if the overall message from 'the group' is one of some form of 'Theism' that you'll be able to form a support group for yourself of likeminded 'individuals' there.....ya think....? mebbe....?

You can check out some of the stickies here and on the other Secular forum (Secular 12-Step Recovery) too. I believe somewhere here there is a listing of a number of different secular recovery groups....: SMART Recovery; Rational Recovery; LifeRing to name a few (they mostly may be addressing the alcoholics and addicts, but ...... any port in a storm, eh.....?).

I hope this has helped some..... (o: ....and DON'T FORGET us here @ SoberRecovery; you'll probably always find someone here to help, even if only a shoulder, or an ear (er, an eye...?) ..... (o:


NoelleR


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Old 09-05-2008, 01:36 AM
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I know on the SMART Recovery forums there's a sub-forum specifically for friends and family. There's no God or religion there. You could check that out, just google it.
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Old 09-05-2008, 03:49 AM
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Narconon is associated with Scientology. NarAnon is a 12 step group like AlAnon.

Smart Meeting

SMART RecoveryŽ - Meetings

USA California Los Angeles Friday 2:30-4:30 PM Beverly Hills Public Library 444 N. Rexford Dr. 310-275-5433 ex 2 Contact Name: Don MacDonald (F) Mark Kern (VA)
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Old 09-05-2008, 07:41 AM
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LifeRing Online Support Comes in Many Flavors:

Chat Rooms -- Scheduled online meetings or random encounters anytime, see schedule. Instant access, easy registration. Public, anonymous, may or may not be moderated. Enter now. Read Chat FAQ & Help.

LifeRing E-Pals -- New to sobriety or LifeRing? There are LifeRing members who can lend a private ear and answer questions via email. If the chats and forum are a bit too intimidating right now, this might be a way of getting the information you need. Send a post to Craig W. Please allow 48 hours for a response.

LifeRing Recovery Forum -- Anonymous, public message board. One-time registration with Delphi.com required to post. Read and post messages using browser. Don S., moderator. Enter now.

LifeRing on Ning.com. A social network similar to MySpace, dedicated to support for living clean and sober the LifeRing way. Offers photos, videos, MP3s, blogs, text messaging, etc. Open. Go there.

LSRSAFE -- An email list for those seeking Support, Affirmation, Friendship and Encouragement (S.A.F.E.). It's a strong, secure place where we seek to nurture the 'sober self' that exists inside us all. This list is lightly moderated in an attempt to discourage disruptive or abusive postings, and personal attacks on members are not tolerated. Craig W., moderator. Subscribe.

Tom Shelley's "LSRmail" email list. Unmoderated. Private, real names only. One-time registration via email to Tom Shelley, list owner. Details. Apply to join now.

WOList. An e-mail list that permits women to discuss how relationship, family, work, and personal growth issues impact their sobriety. All women are welcome to join. Jacquelyn Jones, moderator. Subscribe.

LSR-LO LifeRing Loved One. LSR-LO is a secular support group for people who love people who are addicted. We are concerned mothers, fathers, partners, husbands, wives, children, siblings, girlfriends and boyfriends of people whose drinking or substance use is out of control. We have one thing in common: Our lives are affected by addiction, just as surely as the lives of the people who are addicted. Denise B., list owner. Unmoderated, unrestricted. Subscribe.

LSRbody. For people in recovery who wish to share joys and concerns with weight loss, exercise, and overall body image. The purpose is to provide support in achieving individual goals with regard to one's body, whatever they may be. CA Edington, moderator. Subscribe.

Sober Coffeehouse. For intellectual-political-cultural-economic discussion too remote from sobriety topics to run comfortably on the LSRmail list. Mark C., host. Subscribe.

LSR-UK. A list for anyone in and around the UK who is interested in secular sobriety. Subscribe.

LSR - South Jersey/Philadelphia area e-mail list for people in the Southern New Jersey and Northeastern Pennsylvania area. Subscribe.

LSR - SFBay email list. Online community for San Francisco Bay Area LifeRing participants. Stay in touch with your sober friends after you graduate from your treatment program. Catch announcements of local meeting changes and bulletins from the Service Center. Subscribe now.

LifeRing in Texas. For Texas folks interested in meeting online and in building face-to-face meetings in the state. Jessica H., moderator. Subscribe.

LifeRing convenor's list. For people worldwide starting or leading meetings or doing other service work with LifeRing. Do you want to start a new meeting, but the idea is too scary? Already have a meeting, but want advice? This is the place to get support! Apply to join now.

Gateway to LifeRing Email Lists

Last edited by doorknob; 09-05-2008 at 08:08 AM.
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Old 09-05-2008, 03:01 PM
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cacaringsister, I'm a couple hours north of you and I also work a secular recovery. Not just for my own addiction, but also for working with the issues with my addicted mother. Since my grandma raised me, its more like having an addicted sister and I feel right at home here at the Friends and Family forum. Everyone knows that I work a secular program (SMART) and they are okay with that.

For me, the important part is that I work some type of program. Whether NarAnon, AlAnon or SMART, i think its important.

I do know many who don't believe in a god get a lot out of AlAnon. The trick is to find the right group. Remember a HP (Higher Power) doesn't have to be god, it can be the Group Of family members affected by Drink (shortened to GOD) or even a book. In fact, I had a friend who had a book that seemed to give her peace and advice when she had problems. That was her HP.

Whether SMART or AlAnon, any program has many benefits when we feel we are battling with the issues you and I share.
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Old 09-12-2008, 12:35 AM
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THANK YOU all for your help! I am inspired to check out many of these programs, especially the SMART program.

I most especially appreciate all of your support and listening... by just vocalising my pain in this forum, I have found support in the last week from many unexpected corners... and I am actively seeing how I can express my love and support for my brother without giving up my boundaries or enabling his addition.

I just sent him a 'love' letter. I told him how much I cared about him and that I had full faith in his ability to find his way. I only hope that when he gets it he is in a state to receive my words of love. And while I may not be Christian, I am a full believer in the power of love and faith.

Thank you all again. I appreciate your caring
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Old 09-12-2008, 06:28 AM
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Thank YOU for letting us know how it is going! Love to hear from you as you go through this journey. It helps me alot to hear from others.

Thanx:ghug
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