Help Secular People!
 

Someone please "smack" me on the forehead if I ever post in another thread that discusses anything having to do with a HP. I'm sorry I ever looked at it--I really am. I need to stop reading the one that's gotten some interesting responses because I'm starting to get a headache ....................



*Breathe* ....................In with the good air, out with the bad............................................... ......I need to get off of this computer..........I hope I'm not getting addicted to the internet again!

I'm having the same problem.

Sorry, Bamboozle :) As you can see I can't help myself right now!

Take a break, homies. :Hat

The only reason I originally posted in that thread was because it was filed under the "Newcomers to Recovery" section...PLUS, it wasn't really clear in its intentions. I personally didn't like the tone of where the thread was going, so I put in my own thoughts as to the HP question. I was concerned that someone in a similar situation to mine would get discouraged and turned off to SR by some of the comments that had been made. My intention was never to slam anyone's method of recovery, and I apologize again to anyone reading this who got that impression. Although that thread is an interesting read, it’s gone completely off topic. The original author should start a new thread with clear intentions as to which direction the thread should take. I can only hope that newcomers to SR who are more secularly oriented will find this “Secular Connections” forum. Sadly, it doesn’t garner the level of traffic that the “Newcomers” section does. Thank you everyone and sorry for complaining.

Hey, no worries. I've been dealing with it for 3 years! When I first got here, there was no Secular Connections (Thank you MG & Alera). Things are slowly changing. Here and in the real world. I found this post really helpful:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post1886181

Read that one (if you haven't already) and then bounce out.

Thanks, DK.

thanks DK...I hesitated but then posted.

I am right there with you bamboozle, those posts do get off track fast. Hot/Cold, black/white sort of thing. No in between and that isn't right IMHO. We all have our own opinions/paths that work for us, or keep us searching... and mine is not yours (not you per say) and yours is not mine.

I will keep my opinions here. Where we seem to be on the same page at least. And try very hard to help each other. ;)

Me too.

Hi Bamboozle. :)

Um, keep coming back. LOL

Hi everyone...sometimes I just can't help myself when it comes to those threads....character flaw?.......I guess? I know it's always another exercise in futility every time I look, but.......(moth to a flame...........)....???





Krissy.....I like your avatar. :)

I don't post a whole lot, but I know to keep my opinions to myself in those types of threads.

I've had a bit of experience with both AA and secular programs. I've come to believe that the biggest indicator if a program will work, is if you believe it will....and I just leave it at that.

But anyway, saw the south park episode 'bloody mary' last night, it's AA related and gave me a chuckle. Not for the easily offended, but it's available online if you google it.

night all.

I, Bamboozle, hereby pledge to keep my opinions/personal experiences to myself the next time I stumble across a thread like that.

I don't know, Bamboozle. I think the reason things are changing in the recovery community and the treatment industry is because people are speaking out. It's not about what you say, but how you say it, IMO. I might have found recovery years ago had I been given some options.

Hello, my name is Katie, and I am addicted to debating with god-people even though it does nothing but p!ss both of us off.

But I will not be asking a HP to remove the desire to debate from me.

I just read through that thread....wow...glad I'd missed out! lol

I seem to be in the same boat as all of you! I am sometimes intentionally 15 mins late to meetings and slip out just before the closing prayer thing! I am still stuck on this HP thing. How does one get past step 2 and 3 w/out a "Higher Power"?



My best friend is a Christian and she is always trying to get me to go to church with her, so are a few other people. I am really getting tired of being asked!! I just tell them N/A meetings are my "church"!!

http://samarirshad.files.wordpress.c...8/04/moth1.gif...LOL

My adverse reactions to HP stuff started out as a symptom of PTSD and then became a personality flaw (disorder?). So it is seems that I try to displace my frustration (disorder?) onto others that have HP beliefs. Creating more frustration. For now, until I work out a strategy (future secular recovery topic?) to deal with my problem avoidance of any symptom trigger is best.

Made me think zencat....well, one way i deal with the whole god thing in meetings, is try to listen to what the person is describing as the expereince rather than the words they use to describe it.

One lady in our group simply leaves the room for the lord's prayer and comes back afterwards. For me, I say something that is meaningful to me to myself but hold hands with everyone. I feel a part of with out participating in something that I find uncomfortable.

I simply leave the word god off the serinity prayer when it is said.

I have ptsd and other stuff, and my first reaction to people who disagree with me wether it is politics, religion, or what ever, is to turn things to an me vs them thing...that doesn't usually help me or the other person/s...So I am working on skills for listening and vocalizing without that right/wrong mentality that is so ingrained in my thinking.

Thanks all.

Thanks for the input Ananda, I get what your saying and know to look beyond the words and get to the meaning. Early in my first attempt at recovery I had no problem with seeing past the language of description. I recognized it was how some come to believe.
Also I was moving through a strong belief in my own path then. This allowed me to be at ease with other peoples belief. Then too I would not be threatened when others disrespected my belief, I just walked on. I hope to get back to that soon.

me too :(

Wow, I was raised totally secular so I can't say I've had any bad experiences with religion (other than my experiences with AA/NA). I just have a very low tolerance for dogma.

Good stuff, people. Thank you all. I don't know what I'd do without you. :) Zencat, you win the magical prize (if I can find it) for the pic. I was wondering who was going to do that first! LOL!






Wow...that one really got to me...thanks, DK. That's part of the reason I posted in that particular thread. I kept thinking about secular minded newcomers getting discouraged, so I put in my own experience. I don't think I helped.

I don't know...it takes a lot to upset me, personally. I was getting upset for other people. I don't care if anyone thinks that I'm intellectualizing or avoiding or in denial...that's only their opinions. I'm confident enough in myself, but maybe some newbies out there don't need to be hearing that when they see those things. What can you do? Peace, peeps!

Yeah, man. I've gone home from a few AA meetings crying. I can remember (actually, I can't forget) going to one after getting out of a 21 day inpatient treatment program in that town that was based on Choice Theory. Well, as part of my introduction to the group I talked about it, as well as the LifeRing online meetings I was doing. Well, next an oldtimer shared about how Choice Theory was crap, blah, blah and I tried to defend myself the best I could (with about 60 days of sobriety that I was hanging on to by a thread). A couple of other people jumped in and they were about to hold a group conscience to kick me out, but I left and then broke down. I went home and wrote a rap that was like Emimem meets The Orange Papers. I relapsed a couple of days later and posted an email to the LifeRing Email List (the one the 'Keepers' are from) entitled something like "Blowing Chunks and Still Hating AA." It was pretty pathetic and wasn't one of my better moments. I used to not care what people believed in.. now I have fish parodies all over my car. I guess that's something I'm going to have to get over someday. Anyway, there's a little bit about me for ya!

People are in meetings and where there's people there's drama and where there's drama there's danger. For me, anyways.

Windy, I hear ya...


Wow...DK...I don't know what to say...except that's why I don't do groups. I admit, I've never been to AA, but knowing how I am and hearing the horror stories from other secular people, I don't even want to risk putting myself in a potentially dangerous situation like that. If I had been in your shoes, I would have relapsed immediately after I'd left. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

I don't believe in god, but I go to AA and it has been a postivie for me most of the time. Wasn't always that way...somewhat dependent on time and place and people...and people change including me.

Alot of other ways to get sober secular exsist and i think thats great and use any ways of staying sober that i find and that work for me.

Not wanting to horn in on a thread, but just thought it might be a good idea to mention that my time in AA as a non-god person has been overall positive this time.

:ghug

Bamboozle, do you live anywhere near Morgantown?