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Old 07-17-2012, 12:18 PM
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Hi alien22, welcome back to SR.

Here's SOS, I consider AA to be faith based and I'm not sure about Hinduism or Taoism one way or the other.
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Old 07-17-2012, 12:34 PM
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Wow that was quick. Thanks Zencat, i will try and keep my posts here in the secular then, of course, and i have just briefly looked at the SOS link, not sure yet how much online support they offer, but i'll keep searching the site.

In retrospect, having googled the term 'paganism', it would appear to be a very wide definition, mostly referring to belief systems which do not 'proselytize'. So the previous statement was probably accurate, and i learned something new!!
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Old 08-08-2012, 05:38 PM
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Originally Posted by alien22 View Post
In retrospect, having googled the term 'paganism', it would appear to be a very wide definition, mostly referring to belief systems which do not 'proselytize'. So the previous statement was probably accurate, and i learned something new!!
It does, and it is, and we do not. I am a Pagan, hope it helps "Pagan" (yes, I capitalize it) is an umbrella term covering many kinds of what we call "paths" (denominations). Wiccan is an example. Asatru is another. Druid is another. Many people consider native spiritualities to be Pagan because there's not One Male God. Or Hindu religions also.

And no, no Pagan I have ever known tries to recruit new ones.

Does that help?
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Old 08-08-2012, 11:47 PM
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yes, that helps me some Maiasaura, just trying to get my terms right, and certainly didn't previously think of Hinduism or Buddhism as 'pagan', but i guess i am having to expand my definition. Thanks.

~alien22
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Old 11-22-2012, 12:37 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by doorknob View Post
This got buried with a closed thread but I think it belongs here. Thank you Sunyata.
Originally Posted by janedoe82 View Post
Probably the best thing I've read in a long long long time...thank you for this!
These are astoundingly beautiful, thank you. Brought me to tears.
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Old 11-22-2012, 12:45 AM
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Hello. I just joined this site like ten minutes ago, but I'm really excited at the idea of having something so easily accessibly when I might feel slippery. I am in the phase of this process where I acknowledge poor habbits really stunting long term success in my life and its starting to really frighten me. Anyway, I was merely browsing the site and noticed your tips of staying on track. Thanks for the post.
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Old 11-22-2012, 01:03 AM
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welcome to SR IDONTEVENKNOW

D
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Old 11-23-2012, 06:54 PM
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Welcome to the Secular Forums at SR. I'm glad you registered.
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Old 12-20-2012, 03:06 PM
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Originally Posted by doorknob View Post
This got buried with a closed thread but I think it belongs here. Thank you Sunyata.
...
8)Insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results. Converse of above, anything that hurts you....DON'T DO!
I've seen this definition before, but for me it should be insanity is repeating the same mistakes over and over expecting the exact same horrible results. Every time I drank, I knew that I would not stop at 1 or 2, that I would get drunk, that I would wake up around 1am with insomnia and still drunk, that I would wake up exhausted, that I would be unable to perform my job adequately, that I would lack the energy to give my family attention, that would more day would go by that I didn't start getting better... Knowing all that, I would still make the choice to drink. I am new to this forum and still getting acquainted - lots of great information, experience and support everywhere.
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Old 03-03-2013, 07:32 PM
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I agree McKenna, thanks for posting these doorknob and Zencat. I also copied them and saved them. I plan to read them over regularly.
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Old 06-24-2013, 01:30 PM
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I used WFS predominantlyand also liked a sort of hybrid of RR and AVRT. That was 4 years ago. The WFS Competency model was the road map that worked for me. I loved the positivity and attention to personal growth. We all have to find the recipe that works for us specifically, no one size fits. I am glad to see this posted here,,,a nice reminder.
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Old 08-02-2013, 06:49 PM
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What is a skin meeting and sos?
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Old 01-13-2014, 07:39 AM
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My Short list:

Don't drink......NO MATTER WHAT!!!!!

Its worked for me for the past 12 years now.

Happy Trails
Hiwayman
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Old 02-22-2014, 11:53 AM
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I'm with Nora; I'd love to know the terminology. I'm sorry if I've missed it somewhere in this thread.
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Old 02-22-2014, 05:15 PM
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The link to SOS was given before

http://www.cfiwest.org/sos/index.htm

'skin' meetings are a new one on me tho

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Old 02-22-2014, 07:54 PM
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How about 'skin' or 'face to face' meetings, as opposed to online meetings or cyber meetings on teh interwebs. I think that's what the term means.
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Old 03-15-2014, 06:00 PM
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This is/was my toolbox:

1) Self-efficacy --belief in MYSELF and my ability to stop drinking and stay stopped. I have several statements of belief in this that I often repeat to myself when in need:

A) I am powerful over alcohol; I have the power to refuse to drink.
B) I have done remarkable things that I did not think I could do (repeat list of remarkable things). If I can do these things then I can quit drinking.
C) My father was a chain smoker. One day he just quit and never ever smoked another cigarette again, no drugs, no help, not even cutting back. He quit. If he could do that with cigarettes, I can do that with alcohol.

2) Beast-Talk: "No, you CANNOT have a glass of wine because you wouldn't have a glass. You would have the whole bottle!" et cetera.

3) Daily heavy breathing, sweating till I'm soaked aerobic exercise.

4) Drinking plenty of water.

5) Vitamin supplements and a reasonably good diet, but permission to eat what I want in lieu of DRINKING.

6) Sleep. Get plenty of it. More, if you want.

7) Say no to stress. When I am already stressed, I take a break. I don't keep pushing.

8) Music. I started and then built from there a huge playlist of songs that inspire me, energize me, speak to various parts of me that are important. I have another kind of music that I use to calm and soothe me.

9) Habit and structure. The majority of my day, most days, is plotted out. I used to hate that. Even when I was drinking I was goal-oriented and got most of those things done anyways, just not always at the same times. Now I like the habit/structure thing. It walls off other things. It's safe, it's predictable and it gives me a sense of accomplishment that I can follow a pattern no matter what else is going on in my life to stress me out. It reduces the number of opportunities I have to sit down and feel sorry for myself and get tempted to drink.

10) Alternatives to drinking: take a hot bath, read a novel, go to bed, eat something you love, meditation, take a walk, take an ibuprofen (for headache related to stress or PAWS).

11) I've just added weekly meetings at the local Lifering. I find that getting sober and staying sober are two different things. Getting sober is a more or less heroic accomplishment. Staying sober feels dull and dragging to me and I need to go outside myself for support to do that. I still get too many temptations to drink and the Beast voice has gotten louder again now that I've "proved" to myself that I can be sober. I need other people now.

Finally there is the two step Program:

Stop drinking.
STAY stopped.

If none of my tools are working I just hang onto Step Two until the urge to drink passes. I had a whole day last weekend where I just holed up in a dark room in my jammies and watched stupid movies and felt like s--t. That's what I did. But I didn't DRINK.
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Old 03-17-2014, 05:15 PM
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awesome thread. thanks all for the great info and insights.
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Old 04-02-2014, 12:43 AM
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These are some of the things/thoughts that "work" for me.....
0) follow my dreams (for they speak of the "present" that is in the moment & my potential future)
1) find Joy in my life
2) forget @ having a boyfriend
3) find a good friend
4) love "Miso" my kitten (alias "sugar-muffin")
5) take it one day at a time
6) screw stupid neighbors
7) remember "Raku'", the Cat, full of kindness
8) be responsible & forget @ being angry & stop being overly dynamic
9) CREATE !
10) Love.
11) and cry enough to water the flowers, and listen to the morning dove.
12) remember the good times
13) remember to give back
14) cherish life's memories!
15) allow others, the ones with wisdom, who are mirrors for me, to help
16) sell the F150 pick-up
17) know thyself
18) know NOW
19) forget the Past, yet remember the Future
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Old 03-16-2015, 07:40 PM
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Great list, thank you.
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