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Old 09-16-2008, 09:11 AM
  # 181 (permalink)  
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Sorry, Bam. Was talkin to someone who reads here every now and then. You might know him. He's a good guy.
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Old 09-22-2008, 06:23 PM
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I got nothin'
 
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Hello, DK. What's up?
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Old 09-25-2008, 04:05 AM
  # 183 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by doorknob View Post
I'm probably being a whiney little baby, but I'm really having a hard time being optimistic about my life right now. My girlfriend and I moved to Davenport, WA about a month ago. It's a little wheat farming town located 35 miles west of Spokane. We were trying to move to Spokane or a neighboring town because we both have family there who we were only getting to see a couple times a year being 3 hours away. Also, we wanted more job opportunities than we had in the Leavenworth area. Susan, who is an incredible singer is trying to get into a band and I really want to go back to being a gymnastics instructor. I like to sing too, and we did find a great place to sing Karaoke, but it is still 25 miles away. Anyway, we ended up here because we couldn't find anything closer that would take 2 dogs and a cat, especially given our time and money constraints. Susan is a caregiver and found a job before we got here. I, on the other hand have been unemployed for a month. There is very little work here in Davenport, and I am somewhat limited in what kind of work I can do because so many things trigger my OCD rituals, and employers are not going to pay someone to be 'stuck' all the time. There are some jobs in Airway Heights, which is 25 miles away, but my car is old and the commute is costly with gas prices what they are. I'm just having a hard time not feeling depressed and hopeless. As far as f2f meetings, there is one AA meeting here, which for me can be a double edged sword. I know, I could be in much worse situations and I keep trying to remind myself of that. But still...

A guy recently told me he does "medical repricing" at home on his pc, his leisure a couple hours a day. Makes 900 pr month part time. There may be some inexpensive software needed. So what? It's cheaper than gas. A perfect settin for an OCD'er. Good luck and God bless ya
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Old 09-26-2008, 10:28 AM
  # 184 (permalink)  
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Thanks GS, I'll look into it. If you have any links or a company name or could possibly find out, that would be great. If not, no worries. I've been working for min wage at a grocery store in town for a couple of weeks but I don't know how long I'll be able to keep it up.
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Old 09-27-2008, 04:54 PM
  # 185 (permalink)  
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Okay, my homie Boleo reminded me that I love old Metallica (Four Horseman reference), and that is gonna be my new project when I detox. I have to perfect and record Master of Puppets on Singsnap. Twangy country tunes, Rap, and now Metal, back when it was good...
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Old 10-10-2008, 04:25 PM
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Well, I just quit my job. Lasted a whole month... I knew from the start it was only a matter of time. It was OCD hell and a lot of pressure and anxiety for a little bit of money. Plus, the owner is a person who really has no compassion or understanding for people who are struggling with life, not even his minimum wage employees who have no health care. I think it's time for me to try to get some kind of disability and get some help.
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Old 10-10-2008, 06:00 PM
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(((((((((DK)))))))))))

A month is a long time in a job you hate!
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Old 10-10-2008, 10:27 PM
  # 188 (permalink)  
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Hi Paul,

It's good to hear from you, even with the sucky part about your job. But it didn't sound like a healthy place for you to be. So go for the assistance. Is there are reason you have to stay in this small town with so limited options?

I can't wait to hear your Metallica.

I don't post much...really not much of a forum person, I guess. It kind of throws me.

I've been going to AA and trying to be like dear Ananda. I think she's got it down on how to take what you need and leave the rest. But the face-to-face experience has been most beneficial. And here there are tons of meetings and all kinds of people. Some places are open 24 hours a day and there are meetings at midnight.

Anyway, I am still glad to see you posting.

Hello to the two zens also.

Hugs,
Donna

:wave
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Old 10-11-2008, 05:49 AM
  # 189 (permalink)  
things as it is
 
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Hi Donna. Nice to hear from you. You got it right. Ananda has much wisdom.

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Old 10-11-2008, 08:17 AM
  # 190 (permalink)  
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aw shucks....your inflating my ego!!!!!

Donna I'm glad you posted...I bet yuo would have a lot to contribute to the secualr 12 step post as well.

DK - I really like the way you are talking about pursuing more help. I'm having to look at some extra help I need to get with some of my stuff....just at the sorta maybe i will stage with it.

Bam and DK you have really brought alot to this forum. thanks

Where's Zencat????

And Zendust...can't believe I missed you again :ghug3
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Old 10-11-2008, 12:10 PM
  # 191 (permalink)  
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donna, believe it or not, I'm not a forum person myself.

One thing I did find helpful was posting in a thread like this once a day. I may only post "still here, still clean" but it helps me remind myself I'm still not using. It also helps me with accountability to others.

Most important just by posting I find nuggets of helpful information by others that I would have missed.

If I sound pushy I'm sorry. Just wanted to share my experience.
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Old 10-11-2008, 12:45 PM
  # 192 (permalink)  
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You're not being pushy, Alera. Thanks for the post, although I don't miss much on the forum as it's been part of my daily perusal since first putting down the bottle. I continue to learn a great deal from all the different topics and subforums here at SR. I just don't post very often, maybe because I don't feel very helpful or encouraging to others yet.

And there's something about cyberspace that leaves me feeling a little creeped out. But accountability is a good thing, I suppose, so I can at least check in and say hi to everyone.

Hi, everyone! I'm thinking of you.
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Old 10-11-2008, 01:03 PM
  # 193 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by desertdonna View Post
It's good to hear from you, even with the sucky part about your job. But it didn't sound like a healthy place for you to be. So go for the assistance. Is there are reason you have to stay in this small town with so limited options?

I can't wait to hear your Metallica.
Hi Donna,

We had planned to move to a small community about 15 minutes from Spokane, but that fell through and we ended up a little farther out. We had to sign a one year lease for the trailer park, and the 'rent to own' on the tin can is 3 years. So, we could probably move again next summer if we wanna bail on the rent to own option, provided we can find a place for 2 dogs and a cat in or closer to Spokane. Where we're at, it's about a 45 minute drive into town. Airway Heights is about a half hour and is alteast big enough to have a Walmart. I've been fighting it since we got here, but I'm just gonna have to consider commuting a necessity of life until we can move camp again.

Are you a Metallica fan? I was gonna try Master of Puppets, but I just can't scream like that for any length of time. I tried Fade to Black and I'm pretty sure I can pull that one off. I've been working on a couple of Kid Rock songs, one singing and one rap. I don't really have them down good enough to share yet, although they're getting closer. I'm pretty picky. I'd actually like to redo the ones I've already posted. They have mistakes.
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Old 10-11-2008, 09:33 PM
  # 194 (permalink)  
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I don't even believe I'm putting this on here...

SingSnap | Fade To Black by Farmtown_Flowamatic

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Old 10-11-2008, 09:56 PM
  # 195 (permalink)  
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glad you posted that DK...nice!
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Old 10-11-2008, 10:46 PM
  # 196 (permalink)  
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That’s a great song, Paul, way to go! I can’t help having an appreciation of Metallica being an old rocker fan; not that into heavy metal but there are some songs that just hit it with their brilliance. I can’t even imagine trying to sing it. You’ve got such talent.

Side note: Around twenty years ago, before public karaoke came on the scene, there was this little place inside a mall in upstate New York where you could rent a booth for 10 minutes at $20 a pop and sing over and record the top songs while the words played on a screen. There was even a mirror inside so you could not only try to read the words on the display, but admire yourself at the same time. So here’s this friend and me crammed into this booth, taking turns belting Guns N’ Roses’ “Sweet Child o’ Mine” while trying our damndest not to laugh or find a small pause to take a breath and straining to get that shriek at the end. We thought we were so hot. I have the cassette buried in a box somewhere. It’s a good thing it wasn’t a public event as we were stunningly bad, but still love the song.

Anyway, I knew that you lived in a smaller town in Washington and that you and your girlfriend reside in a mobile. It’s the proverbial rock and hard place when you’re leasing and options are limited. There are ways to break the lease/option without paying more money, but it depends on the lease clauses and having it looked at by an attorney or legal aid. Anything like that there? How about medical/health/social services facilities that are close that could assist with OCD issues? I also remember someone on the forum taking online classes to get a better job. Maybe an option?

So we keep singing and reach out for what we need away from the bottle or the pot. At the very least there’ll be more money in our pocket and we won’t feed the beast.

Good thoughts to you. Thanks for the songs. Still wish I could pull up a chair on karaoke night. Hang in there.

Hugs,
Donna
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Old 10-12-2008, 10:01 AM
  # 197 (permalink)  
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SS - hope you are feeling somewhat better today! get lots of sleep!

hey to the rest of you too!

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Old 10-15-2008, 09:35 AM
  # 198 (permalink)  
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Old 10-15-2008, 09:47 AM
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beautiful dk!

give them both kisses and hugs from me please
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Old 10-29-2008, 09:58 AM
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I'm starting to feel a little desperate. 32-64 ounces of beer per day and/or smoking pot is not manageable.
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