Left AA?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: TX
Posts: 35
It is all right to leave AA if it does not suit you. It is also all right to leave after you are OK.
Pepole are in charge of their own problem solving.
AA is a row boat; not a houseboat. One uses it to get across and move on.
Pepole are in charge of their own problem solving.
AA is a row boat; not a houseboat. One uses it to get across and move on.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Great Barrington, MA
Posts: 1
I am seriously debating whether or not to leave the group, not because I want to drink, but because there are so many unhealthy, crazy, egoistic people who use the meetings as a grand stage for their "recovery". There is a great deal of talking about spiritual values, but very few genuine examples of these values, other than a lot of rhetoric. There are some wonderful people I have met, too, including my sponsor, who is a very good man, but I grow weary of the fear and repetition of sacred ideology I find in most meetings. Free thinking is discouraged, as is excellence of any kind. The old "crabs in a barrel" metaphor always come to mind. Fit in at all costs, I tell myself, and then hate myself for lying.
Thanks for the post
Joe
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Murrieta, Ca
Posts: 2,683
..."How am I ever going to get well hanging around so many sick people?"
I know this is the secular forum, but I had to pitch in.
We get well by helping other sick people. Your meeting sounds great to me !
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Windy is right about meetings being filled with court ordered people and a good place to find a new connection.
I have found a two ways to minimize this:
1) Go to the earliest meeting possible. I go to a 6:30am meeting. A lot less court ordered folks are up at that hour.
2) Go to closed meetings, there are zero or nearly zero court ordered folks at closed meetings.
I have found a two ways to minimize this:
1) Go to the earliest meeting possible. I go to a 6:30am meeting. A lot less court ordered folks are up at that hour.
2) Go to closed meetings, there are zero or nearly zero court ordered folks at closed meetings.
Reach Out and Touch Faith
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: On a Sailboat
Posts: 3,871
Originally Posted by dgillz 
Windy is right about meetings being filled with court ordered people and a good place to find a new connection.
I have found a two ways to minimize this:
1) Go to the earliest meeting possible. I go to a 6:30am meeting. A lot less court ordered folks are up at that hour.
2) Go to closed meetings, there are zero or nearly zero court ordered folks at closed meetings.
I have found a two ways to minimize this:
1) Go to the earliest meeting possible. I go to a 6:30am meeting. A lot less court ordered folks are up at that hour.
2) Go to closed meetings, there are zero or nearly zero court ordered folks at closed meetings.
Reach Out and Touch Faith
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: On a Sailboat
Posts: 3,871
Originally Posted by dgillz
Heck Windy I wake up every day at 4am. 6:30 is mid morning to me.
when I have to wake up at 8 am for class.
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
Windy cracks me up.
It bothers me (when I think about it long enough) when I read/hear people who've become defensive because AA didn't solve anything for them.
But it doesn't necessarily tell me the Program doesn't work.
it tells me more that the 'hand of AA' wasn't there in that case.
Everyone is free to choose. It bothers me when it's made out like they were railroaded or intimidated.
One guy put it to me this way once - he has 28 years sober and in the Program:
AA is full of alcoholics - worse - it's full of human beings.
It bothers me (when I think about it long enough) when I read/hear people who've become defensive because AA didn't solve anything for them.
But it doesn't necessarily tell me the Program doesn't work.
it tells me more that the 'hand of AA' wasn't there in that case.
Everyone is free to choose. It bothers me when it's made out like they were railroaded or intimidated.
One guy put it to me this way once - he has 28 years sober and in the Program:
AA is full of alcoholics - worse - it's full of human beings.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,878
Yes Barb, making wide generalizations about AA from subjective experiences and attributing those experiences to AA as a whole is mistaken. However, sometimes one needs to vent without being corrected or judged. Its difficult to find the proper place and time for that without insulting the sensibilities of others.
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
I see it a lot, too, Zen ... and even as an 'insider' it makes me uncomfortable. After all, I didn't start drinking like the alcoholic I am until I was 43. That's because I lived an exceedingly spiritual life ... certainly not a religious one.
While I'll jump on the wagon as quick as anyone, I know and hopefully don't 'expect' to change anyone's mind .. or try to guilt them into going against what their own inner voice is telling them.
I hope that makes sense.
And boy howdy do things ever need to be able to vent -
otw, it DOES turn into yet another religion ...
While I'll jump on the wagon as quick as anyone, I know and hopefully don't 'expect' to change anyone's mind .. or try to guilt them into going against what their own inner voice is telling them.
I hope that makes sense.
And boy howdy do things ever need to be able to vent -
otw, it DOES turn into yet another religion ...
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Agrippa,
Who are you responding to? No one on this entire thread - I just reread twice - has said that it is necessary to hit rock bottom. 2 people said they do not believe this. One of those 2 said that he had to hit his rock bottom, but did not believe others have to do it the way he did.
Maybe I missed something, all I did was review the entire thread looking for the word "rock". My apologies if I missed it.
For my part, I agree with the poster that said a lot of people in AA strongly believe that you have to hit rock bottom, because those that did not hit rock bottom but decided to clean up their act anyway, are not in the rooms of AA to share this.
Who are you responding to? No one on this entire thread - I just reread twice - has said that it is necessary to hit rock bottom. 2 people said they do not believe this. One of those 2 said that he had to hit his rock bottom, but did not believe others have to do it the way he did.
Maybe I missed something, all I did was review the entire thread looking for the word "rock". My apologies if I missed it.
For my part, I agree with the poster that said a lot of people in AA strongly believe that you have to hit rock bottom, because those that did not hit rock bottom but decided to clean up their act anyway, are not in the rooms of AA to share this.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: TX
Posts: 35
dgillz,
It appears that a significant number of those in AA believe that it is necessary to hit rock bottom.
I drew the inference that those who have not hit 'rock bottom' would not fit in to AA. That appears to be the implication.
Thus, the question.
It appears that a significant number of those in AA believe that it is necessary to hit rock bottom.
I drew the inference that those who have not hit 'rock bottom' would not fit in to AA. That appears to be the implication.
Thus, the question.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Again, there is no one in this thread that has mentioned "rock bottom" except to say it was not necessary. Some of those weren't necessarily even talking about AA recovery, just recovery period.
So that is why I was wondering why you posted the question.
But to chime in, I do not believe this. The term "high bottom drunk" is well known in recovery circles, regardless if it is AA or not. This in and of itself seems to say that not everyone needs to hit rock bottom to fit in.
Having said that, some people will absolutely swear that this is the case. There just aren't any that feel that way that have said as much on this thread.
If you still feel a significant # of people feel that way, maybe you should start a new thread?
So that is why I was wondering why you posted the question.
But to chime in, I do not believe this. The term "high bottom drunk" is well known in recovery circles, regardless if it is AA or not. This in and of itself seems to say that not everyone needs to hit rock bottom to fit in.
Having said that, some people will absolutely swear that this is the case. There just aren't any that feel that way that have said as much on this thread.
If you still feel a significant # of people feel that way, maybe you should start a new thread?
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