Blogs


Notices

Do You Think Too Much?

Old 01-04-2007, 05:13 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: London, UK
Posts: 49
Do You Think Too Much?

I don't know if you're allowed to post stuff like this but I laughed out loud. I lifted this from a website mentioned by Five.

Do You Think Too Much?

It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then to loosen up. Inevitably though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.

I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.

I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself.

I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"

Things weren't going so great at home either. One evening I had turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother's.

I soon had a reputation as a heavy thinker. One day the boss called me in. He said, "Skippy, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job." This gave me a lot to think about.

I came home early after my conversation with the boss. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking..."

"I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!"

"But Honey, surely it's not that serious."

"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver. "You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking we won't have any money!"

"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently, and she began to cry. I'd had enough. "I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door.

I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche, with a PBS station on the radio. I roared into the parking lot and ran up to the big glass doors... they didn't open. The library was closed.

To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night. As I sank to the ground clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye. "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked. You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinker's Anonymous poster.

Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker. I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "P o r k y 's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting.

I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed... easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking.
LadyJane666 is offline  
Old 01-04-2007, 11:54 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Reach Out and Touch Faith
 
shockozulu's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: On a Sailboat
Posts: 3,871
"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently, and she began to cry. I'd had enough. "I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door.

I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche, with a PBS station on the radio. I roared into the parking lot and ran up to the big glass doors... they didn't open. The library was closed.
I had to laugh out loud at this. I work in a library AND while I shelve I listen to Supreme Court Oral Arguments. I think I might need to join TA (Thinkers Anon).
shockozulu is offline  
Old 01-05-2007, 08:01 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Yokohama, Japan
Posts: 487
Originally Posted by LadyJane666 View Post
I don't know if you're allowed to post stuff like this but I laughed out loud. I lifted this from a website mentioned by Five.

Do You Think Too Much?

It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then to loosen up. Inevitably though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.

I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.

I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself.

I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"

Things weren't going so great at home either. One evening I had turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother's.

I soon had a reputation as a heavy thinker. One day the boss called me in. He said, "Skippy, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job." This gave me a lot to think about.

I came home early after my conversation with the boss. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking..."

"I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!"

"But Honey, surely it's not that serious."

"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver. "You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking we won't have any money!"

"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently, and she began to cry. I'd had enough. "I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door.

I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche, with a PBS station on the radio. I roared into the parking lot and ran up to the big glass doors... they didn't open. The library was closed.

To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night. As I sank to the ground clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye. "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked. You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinker's Anonymous poster.

Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker. I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "P o r k y 's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting.

I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed... easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking.
My ex-wife used to tell me I thought too much--true!

This post actually made me "recall" Annie Hall when Woody Allen convinces Diane Keaton to take college courses. I guess he was the enabler, or maybe I'm just thinking too much about this.
BeamMeUpScotty is offline  
Old 01-06-2007, 04:04 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
 
Leo_the_Cat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Chicago IL
Posts: 67
Beam Me Up: Just curious - Do you know what your screen name means (actually its meaning in slang)? That was my doc.
Leo_the_Cat is offline  
Old 01-06-2007, 08:36 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Yokohama, Japan
Posts: 487
Originally Posted by Leo_the_Cat View Post
Beam Me Up: Just curious - Do you know what your screen name means (actually its meaning in slang)? That was my doc.
It's slang meaning? No. Now that you have me thinking about it, it's probably a drug reference.

I know it was never said on the TV show.

For me, it comes from part of my last name and my middle name, with no other connotations connected--for me at least.

Cheers.
BeamMeUpScotty is offline  
Old 01-07-2007, 10:07 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
 
paulmh's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 1,415
Sorry, I'm lost.

Star Trek was your d.o.c.?

Maybe I'm thinking too badly rather than too much....

hmmm..
paulmh is offline  
Old 01-07-2007, 08:04 PM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Yokohama, Japan
Posts: 487
Originally Posted by paulmh View Post
Sorry, I'm lost.

Star Trek was your d.o.c.?

Maybe I'm thinking too badly rather than too much....

hmmm..
Vodka. Has nothing to do with my screen name, though.
BeamMeUpScotty is offline  
Old 01-08-2007, 04:01 PM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
 
Leo_the_Cat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Chicago IL
Posts: 67
It's just slang. "Beam me up Scotty" is an appropriate request to make when entering a crack house. I figured you did not know. It's probably not well know except for some people that used crack.
Leo_the_Cat is offline  
Old 01-09-2007, 05:11 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Yokohama, Japan
Posts: 487
Originally Posted by Leo_the_Cat View Post
It's just slang. "Beam me up Scotty" is an appropriate request to make when entering a crack house. I figured you did not know. It's probably not well know except for some people that used crack.
This is definitly a case of ignorance is bliss!!
BeamMeUpScotty is offline  
Old 01-09-2007, 05:34 PM
  # 10 (permalink)  
To Life!
 
historyteach's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,294
Or a particular area of the country, Leo.
Slang has a way of being very parcular to an area. Geographical differences, ya know?

Shalom!
historyteach is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:26 AM.