historyteach | 09-07-2006 04:03 PM | Questioning Our Character "In order to struggle successfully with yourself, you must know your character intimately, and be aware of your faults. To achieve this self=awareness, sit down with a pen and paper - the exercise will be painful - and write down what you feel are your most obvious character flaws and weaknesses: - Am I prone to anger? When I am angry, do I overreact and say or do things that inflict pain on others? Or am I the sort of person who, if asked, will deny that I am angry, yet will treat other people with coldness, disdain, and annoyance?
- Do I judge others fairly, or am I harshly critical (both in what I say and what I think)?
- Am I stingy with my money or my time?
Do I speak curtly, making people feel that I have no time for them? (This is unkind, even if we are busy.) - Do I avoid saying or doing what I believe is right because I fear how others will react or what they will think of me?
- Am I moody?
- Do I make people around me feel that they are somehow responsible for my moods?
- Does my unhappiness affect the atmosphere in my home, transforming, often in a matter of minutes, a general feeling of pleasantness and good will into one of tension and sadness? (Taking away the good mood of those around us and lowering their spirits is a cruel, even if unintentional, act of aggression.)
- Do I treat strangers with more consideration Than members of my own family?
- Do I take other people's kind behavior for granted, or do I go out of my way to express thanks and help those who have been kind to me?
- Do I blame my wrongful actions and mistakes on others, or do I take responsibility for the wrong I do?
- Do I jump to conclusions and blame other people before I know all the facts?
- Am I able to control my impulses, or do I give in to temptation easily?
- Do I bear grudges and remain angry at others for a long time after an argument?
- Am I tardy, and thereby waste other people's time by keeping them waiting?
- Do I rationalize dishonesty with excuses such as "Business is different?"
- When I hear of other people's sufferings or misfortunes, do I find ways to help them, or do I feel sadness in my heart but do nothing?
- Am I jealous of the success of others? Do I begrudge others their good fortune?
Once you have drawn up your list, do not become discouraged, even if you find that you have many weaknesses. Drawing up a list like this is the first and most important step in changing your character for the better.
Joseph Telushkin"
I would add only one thing to this fine assessment.
When you've finished looking at your weaknesses, make a similar list -- just as long -- of your good character traits.
Balance is everything. :e058:
Shalom! |