It's all about me Part 5
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
Jethro made a trip to town to get us Sub sandwiches! We just finished eating. He picked Maria up off the floor and while holding her he fell back onto the couch! He's stretched out and she's flat as a pancake on his belly! It's nap time for the both of them! I'm not a nap kind of person! I sleep until I wake up! Then I get up and stay awake until I go to bed again! If I'm really really tired or miss a lot of sleep? I might fall asleep in my chair for a little nap while watching TV! It usually rejuvenates me though and I'm awake for several more hours!
Jethro said he needed to order more pain meds before we sat down to eat!
I told him I wish he wouldn't. I was met with silence!
I moved 10 times in one year - years ago! I got rid of more and more stuff with each move! I was looking around my sister's house while there Monday and I just shook my head. She has a LOT of knicknacks all over the place! ARGH! Damned Dust Collectors is what they are! Most of my stuff is packed away! I mean seriously! Just how much does a person have to have anyway? UGH!
I wish Blue was here! I'd slap her silly! I went out with a bag of old pecan halves to feed the SQUIRRELS! I know I didn't just do that! Or did I? Hmmmm
TOD
Jethro said he needed to order more pain meds before we sat down to eat!
I told him I wish he wouldn't. I was met with silence!I moved 10 times in one year - years ago! I got rid of more and more stuff with each move! I was looking around my sister's house while there Monday and I just shook my head. She has a LOT of knicknacks all over the place! ARGH! Damned Dust Collectors is what they are! Most of my stuff is packed away! I mean seriously! Just how much does a person have to have anyway? UGH!
I wish Blue was here! I'd slap her silly! I went out with a bag of old pecan halves to feed the SQUIRRELS! I know I didn't just do that! Or did I? Hmmmm
TOD
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 1,854
Originally Posted by Tiredofdrugs 
Jethro made a trip to town to get us Sub sandwiches! We just finished eating. He picked Maria up off the floor and while holding her he fell back onto the couch! He's stretched out and she's flat as a pancake on his belly! It's nap time for the both of them! I'm not a nap kind of person! I sleep until I wake up! Then I get up and stay awake until I go to bed again! If I'm really really tired or miss a lot of sleep? I might fall asleep in my chair for a little nap while watching TV! It usually rejuvenates me though and I'm awake for several more hours!
Jethro said he needed to order more pain meds before we sat down to eat! I told him I wish he wouldn't. I was met with silence!
I moved 10 times in one year - years ago! I got rid of more and more stuff with each move! I was looking around my sister's house while there Monday and I just shook my head. She has a LOT of knicknacks all over the place! ARGH! Damned Dust Collectors is what they are! Most of my stuff is packed away! I mean seriously! Just how much does a person have to have anyway? UGH!
I wish Blue was here! I'd slap her silly! I went out with a bag of old pecan halves to feed the SQUIRRELS! I know I didn't just do that! Or did I? Hmmmm
TOD
Jethro said he needed to order more pain meds before we sat down to eat!
I told him I wish he wouldn't. I was met with silence!I moved 10 times in one year - years ago! I got rid of more and more stuff with each move! I was looking around my sister's house while there Monday and I just shook my head. She has a LOT of knicknacks all over the place! ARGH! Damned Dust Collectors is what they are! Most of my stuff is packed away! I mean seriously! Just how much does a person have to have anyway? UGH!
I wish Blue was here! I'd slap her silly! I went out with a bag of old pecan halves to feed the SQUIRRELS! I know I didn't just do that! Or did I? Hmmmm
TOD
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 1,854
I had to get caught up with the last page.
Cool your session went good Charley. I know what its like when they are so intense you cry, but in the end I hope it helps get stuff out in the open.
I cant help but feel like lots of people who turn to a drug or drink have negative feelings going on inside before. Some kind of inner critic, depression, anxiety. Mr Blue is his biggest critic and finds fault in himself where no one else ever see's it. But hes getting a lot better at examining his feelings when that kind of negativity strikes.
I hope we can hear a lot of stories about Alaska from you over time Munchkin. I love to learn new things.
Tod, do you have a company that rents the storage boxes. I think they are called Pods. They will bring them out and you can use them temporarily and then when your done send them back. Ive had friends use them when they were preparing to move, or working on updating their house and had to clean things out for a while.
Clean, I owe you a note. IM SORRY, Got busy at work. Im sure the phone call was a shock. The year is almost out too. Maybe they want to see how it goes temporarily to think about it for next year?
BBL
Cool your session went good Charley. I know what its like when they are so intense you cry, but in the end I hope it helps get stuff out in the open.
I cant help but feel like lots of people who turn to a drug or drink have negative feelings going on inside before. Some kind of inner critic, depression, anxiety. Mr Blue is his biggest critic and finds fault in himself where no one else ever see's it. But hes getting a lot better at examining his feelings when that kind of negativity strikes.
I hope we can hear a lot of stories about Alaska from you over time Munchkin. I love to learn new things.
Tod, do you have a company that rents the storage boxes. I think they are called Pods. They will bring them out and you can use them temporarily and then when your done send them back. Ive had friends use them when they were preparing to move, or working on updating their house and had to clean things out for a while.
Clean, I owe you a note. IM SORRY, Got busy at work. Im sure the phone call was a shock. The year is almost out too. Maybe they want to see how it goes temporarily to think about it for next year?
BBL
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
I have discovered there is NO bottom to the mess on the porch! Well maybe? But I haven't found it yet! And now I have to move a huge stack of lumber leaning against the porch railing in order to open the gateway up for Magnum to use the other set of steps!
No wonder Jethro dismissed the thought of me asking him to clear stuff away!
And to top it off! There are those little black ants everywhere now that I've uncovered a portion of the stuff! Ants love anything plastic or cloth like to build their nests in! I've preached this to Jethro time and time again! And yet he has stacks of the stuff on the porch! Pill heads just don't give a damn about stuff! It's the clean headed person in their life that has to deal with the what if's!
If he were to get off the pain meds today and started using the cactus capsules to help with his pain? Like I am! It would take him several months to get his pain under control! He'd have to get past the opiates in his body and get his body use to something else to use for his pain before he'd feel like doing major projects! But as it stands right now? That's not in our future! He doesn't want to live w/o the pain meds!
TOD
No wonder Jethro dismissed the thought of me asking him to clear stuff away!
And to top it off! There are those little black ants everywhere now that I've uncovered a portion of the stuff! Ants love anything plastic or cloth like to build their nests in! I've preached this to Jethro time and time again! And yet he has stacks of the stuff on the porch! Pill heads just don't give a damn about stuff! It's the clean headed person in their life that has to deal with the what if's!
If he were to get off the pain meds today and started using the cactus capsules to help with his pain? Like I am! It would take him several months to get his pain under control! He'd have to get past the opiates in his body and get his body use to something else to use for his pain before he'd feel like doing major projects! But as it stands right now? That's not in our future! He doesn't want to live w/o the pain meds!
TOD
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
Yeah Blue those Pods are expensive! If I'm going to pay a couple of hundred dollars a month for something? It's going to eventually be MINE!
My barn was done thru one of the rent to own places! It's paid off and mine now!
TOD
My barn was done thru one of the rent to own places! It's paid off and mine now!
TOD
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 4,966
Thank you Tod. You are right. Will have to think positively.
Happy moving Charley! Nothing like a move to make you realize you need to lighten your load. But what are you doing with your things if you have no desk? ow was it moving your Mom? Did she have too many things? Its the hardest moving from a larger house to a smaller one!
Did I just read that Tod fed squirrels! No? Not possible is it?
I have a broken charger for my iPad so I'm going to have some difficulties until I can get a new one. Hoping it will be tonight. Tod sorry I know I owe you a message.
Thanks for the info though I always wonder about that when you mention storms. Way too much activity in your state! There is a storm headed our way...supposed to Be a thunderstorm. . but they said it might fizle out before it reaches the island. Ha! Blow hard Tod! I am in the mood to enjoy a nice noisy storm today!
Happy moving Charley! Nothing like a move to make you realize you need to lighten your load. But what are you doing with your things if you have no desk? ow was it moving your Mom? Did she have too many things? Its the hardest moving from a larger house to a smaller one!
Did I just read that Tod fed squirrels! No? Not possible is it?
I have a broken charger for my iPad so I'm going to have some difficulties until I can get a new one. Hoping it will be tonight. Tod sorry I know I owe you a message.
Thanks for the info though I always wonder about that when you mention storms. Way too much activity in your state! There is a storm headed our way...supposed to Be a thunderstorm. . but they said it might fizle out before it reaches the island. Ha! Blow hard Tod! I am in the mood to enjoy a nice noisy storm today!
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
Cleanin! I have the ceiling fan turned on-on the porch! It's blowing it's azz off! LOL Hope it sends some y'all's way! To All of y'all that need it! Did you see all the green and the tall Polk Salad weeds in the AP picture? Jethro mowed the grass AGAIN today! And now the weatherman is saying we have Thunderstorms firing up again! This coming Saturday and Sunday we have 60% and 50% chances of rain! The heat in the afternoons is what causes us to have severe weather during the storms. We really need time to dry out! Things are starting to smell funky outside staying so wet! There's a REAL bad smell under Jethro's barn. It smells like possum!
I told mom about something eating dads Peace Lily! She said it was SLUGS! Ewwwww I have some powder for them so I guess I need to put it in the plant's pot and around it!
Well hell! The power just went off! And then popped right back on! And yes we have power surges on everything around here! Even the pole outside we have a surge protector on the meter where it comes directly to the house! The bad thing though! The central Air will automatically come on when the power is back on. The window unit in here doesn't! That concerns me when the kids are in here and we're gone!
Okay! Back to slaving on the HOT porch!
I swear! Jethro is SO with it! He just walked out here to tell me: "The Power went off!" Well NO CHIT Jethro!
TOD
I told mom about something eating dads Peace Lily! She said it was SLUGS! Ewwwww I have some powder for them so I guess I need to put it in the plant's pot and around it!
Well hell! The power just went off! And then popped right back on! And yes we have power surges on everything around here! Even the pole outside we have a surge protector on the meter where it comes directly to the house! The bad thing though! The central Air will automatically come on when the power is back on. The window unit in here doesn't! That concerns me when the kids are in here and we're gone!
Okay! Back to slaving on the HOT porch!
I swear! Jethro is SO with it! He just walked out here to tell me: "The Power went off!" Well NO CHIT Jethro!
TOD
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 1,854
Originally Posted by Tiredofdrugs
Yeah Blue those Pods are expensive! If I'm going to pay a couple of hundred dollars a month for something? It's going to eventually be MINE!
My barn was done thru one of the rent to own places! It's paid off and mine now!
TOD
My barn was done thru one of the rent to own places! It's paid off and mine now!
TOD
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 4,966
OK Tod! Thank you! I'll let you know if it worked! Ha! Its looking a little cloudy here! I was thinking you all could build a new barn? But see that is what my hubs will think about doing! He has overconfidence! He watches the home improvement shows and how easy it looks to "do it yourself". Then runs into problems and loses interest. That's how we end up with lots and lots of half finished projects around here!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Alaska
Posts: 1,458
Holy moly, you guys are here a lot!
I was in between doing hotel commission check deposits and helping out other offices with group travel when I checked my email and was floored. I can't keep up! LOL
I so wish we could grow NUTS up here! Not a single nut variety grows in Fairbanks.
TOD, I miss thunderstorms. We don't get those that often here.
You know guys, today, maybe it's because I woke up dreaming about the cruise I just got off of beginning of May, but I keep looking at the photos we had done from this cruise to the cruise we took when I first got sober. (that was a challenge, staying sober while everyone on the ship did their best to get wasted! LOL)
My face looks so different now. The cruise in 2012 my face looked puffy, while now it looks lean. Even my Mom recently admitted to me that I look as if I've lost weight (even though I haven't! I've gained as of late. Too many cheesecake slices and lobster and steak and other bad for me snacks when we were on the cruise).
What a difference a couple years make when you are not abusing a substance.
I was in between doing hotel commission check deposits and helping out other offices with group travel when I checked my email and was floored. I can't keep up! LOL
I so wish we could grow NUTS up here! Not a single nut variety grows in Fairbanks.
TOD, I miss thunderstorms. We don't get those that often here.
You know guys, today, maybe it's because I woke up dreaming about the cruise I just got off of beginning of May, but I keep looking at the photos we had done from this cruise to the cruise we took when I first got sober. (that was a challenge, staying sober while everyone on the ship did their best to get wasted! LOL)
My face looks so different now. The cruise in 2012 my face looked puffy, while now it looks lean. Even my Mom recently admitted to me that I look as if I've lost weight (even though I haven't! I've gained as of late. Too many cheesecake slices and lobster and steak and other bad for me snacks when we were on the cruise).
What a difference a couple years make when you are not abusing a substance.
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
Oh here here Munch! We look ALIVE when we arent' using or pickling our bodies! 
Okay y'all! I'm going to tell off on myself! After eating at my sister's! An hour or two passed by. Me, Mom and my sister were standing in the kitchen! Mom reaches out and says: "When are you going to get rid of that? As she pats my belly!" OMG MOM!!!!!! Did I NOT just eat a huge meal? And to my surprise! My sister walks up and pulls her shirt tight over her belly showing her fat! LOL Then we got on the subject of how fat can be so bad for the human body!
Then Mom says something about how she can't understand why me and my younger sister have big butts when she has a washboard butt? I laughed and said: "Haven't you heard the song - All about that bass? And yes mom I have a ghetto boody!"
I finally got Jethro to help me work on cleaning the porch! So I better get back out there. And talk about a stinky funk! OMG! I found it! I was gagging while trying to clean it out!
TOD
Okay y'all! I'm going to tell off on myself! After eating at my sister's! An hour or two passed by. Me, Mom and my sister were standing in the kitchen! Mom reaches out and says: "When are you going to get rid of that? As she pats my belly!" OMG MOM!!!!!! Did I NOT just eat a huge meal? And to my surprise! My sister walks up and pulls her shirt tight over her belly showing her fat! LOL Then we got on the subject of how fat can be so bad for the human body!
Then Mom says something about how she can't understand why me and my younger sister have big butts when she has a washboard butt? I laughed and said: "Haven't you heard the song - All about that bass? And yes mom I have a ghetto boody!"
I finally got Jethro to help me work on cleaning the porch!
So I better get back out there. And talk about a stinky funk! OMG! I found it! I was gagging while trying to clean it out!TOD
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 1,927
Oh sure start talking about fat to the pregnant woman. LOL I have resigned myself Im going to gain weight but hopefully not as much as with my son because I had so much stress, mostly regarding my husband and our situation. Im trying to incorporate many of the simple stress relievers, mindfulness things, and new activities to keep me relaxed and my mind happy too.
But its also a good time to eat special things like cheesecake, and I really want to sample this new bakery we have in town. It is French Pastries and Ive heard the chef is from France. This could be a real disaster for me. Its a tiny shop though, so I hope they can bake enough.
Im so sorry.. I must have been reading too fast last night. I thought the yapping was from your dog. I feel sorry you have to work with someone who is such a chatterbox. It can be very stressful because there is never any silence. But you do have a cat, so your still an animal lover.
I hope the meeting at school goes alright Cleanin... is this for the rest of the year or discussion for next year?
I don't have any storms to send your way, blowing wont help in my case but I will wish a good rainstorm on you. Then it will probably land in all the cities around except yours.
Building your own barn is something my husband would attempt too. Not sure what kind you need, buy you should also look around on some of the sites where people are getting rid of things. Freecycle, or cheapcycle. Ive seen people give them away if someone wants to remove them. Someone in our neighborhood was getting rid of this large storage cabinet made from Rubbermaid or Sterilite cant remember now. It was all together and just sitting out on the road with a sign that said Free. I snatched it up, took it home, cleaned it and absolutely nothing wrong with it. I guess they didn't have room or something? Im sure it was just lucky timing on my part to pass by when I did or it would have been gone. I love free things.
All is well here. Hope everyone has a good day tomorrow.
But its also a good time to eat special things like cheesecake, and I really want to sample this new bakery we have in town. It is French Pastries and Ive heard the chef is from France. This could be a real disaster for me. Its a tiny shop though, so I hope they can bake enough.
Im so sorry.. I must have been reading too fast last night. I thought the yapping was from your dog. I feel sorry you have to work with someone who is such a chatterbox. It can be very stressful because there is never any silence. But you do have a cat, so your still an animal lover.
I hope the meeting at school goes alright Cleanin... is this for the rest of the year or discussion for next year?
I don't have any storms to send your way, blowing wont help in my case but I will wish a good rainstorm on you. Then it will probably land in all the cities around except yours.
Building your own barn is something my husband would attempt too. Not sure what kind you need, buy you should also look around on some of the sites where people are getting rid of things. Freecycle, or cheapcycle. Ive seen people give them away if someone wants to remove them. Someone in our neighborhood was getting rid of this large storage cabinet made from Rubbermaid or Sterilite cant remember now. It was all together and just sitting out on the road with a sign that said Free. I snatched it up, took it home, cleaned it and absolutely nothing wrong with it. I guess they didn't have room or something? Im sure it was just lucky timing on my part to pass by when I did or it would have been gone. I love free things.
All is well here. Hope everyone has a good day tomorrow.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 1,606
Hey everyone
I thought I'd check in after my Vegas adventure.
haha allfor, you have THE excuse to eat whatever you want. Just say "the baby wants/needs it" :-)
I had a blast the last few day and I even won some money gambling. Now i'm in San Francisco for the day and will head back to the East coast tomorrow for one more week can't believe it's already over...
I hope all of you are well! Blue, I owe you a long message, sorry!!! Clean, I miss you!!! I hope the meeting goes well. (((hugs)))
Hi to the rest
I thought I'd check in after my Vegas adventure.
haha allfor, you have THE excuse to eat whatever you want. Just say "the baby wants/needs it" :-)
I had a blast the last few day and I even won some money gambling. Now i'm in San Francisco for the day and will head back to the East coast tomorrow for one more week
can't believe it's already over... I hope all of you are well! Blue, I owe you a long message, sorry!!! Clean, I miss you!!! I hope the meeting goes well. (((hugs)))
Hi to the rest
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
Hi Everyone! It's time for some laughter!
"Lizard Birth"
If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through
the pet syndrome, including toilet flush burials for dead
goldfish, the story below will have you laughing out
LOUD!
Overview: I had to take my son's lizard to the vet.
Here's what happened:
Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me
there was "something wrong" with one of the two
lizards he holds prisoner in his room.
"He's just lying there looking sick," he told me. "I'm
serious, Dad. Can you help?"
I put my best lizard-healer expression on my face and
followed him into his bedroom. One of the little lizards
was indeed lying on his back, looking stressed. I
immediately knew what to do.
"Honey," I called, "come look at the lizard!"
"Oh, my gosh!" my wife exclaimed. "She's having
babies."
"What?" my son demanded. "But their names are
Bert and Ernie, Mom!"
I was equally outraged.
"Hey, how can that be? I thought we said we didn't
want them to reproduce," I said accusingly to my wife.
"Well, what do you want me to do, post a sign in their
cage?" she inquired (I think she actually said this
sarcastically!)
"No, but you were supposed to get two boys!" I
reminded her, (in my most loving, calm, sweet
voice, while gritting my teeth).
"Yeah, Bert and Ernie!" my son agreed.
"Well, it's just a little hard to tell on some guys, you
know," she informed me (Again with the sarcasm!).
By now the rest of the family had gathered to see
what was going on. I shrugged, deciding to make
the best of it.
"Kids, this is going to be a wondrous experience,"
I announced. "We're about to witness the miracle
of birth."
"Oh, gross!" they shrieked
"Well, isn't THAT just great? What are we going to do
with a litter of tiny little lizard babies?" my wife wanted
to know.
We peered at the patient. After much struggling, what
looked like a tiny foot would appear briefly, vanishing
a scant second later.
"We don't appear to be making much progress," I
noted.
"It's breech," my wife whispered, horrified.
"Do something, Dad!" my son urged.
"Okay, okay." Squeamishly, I reached in and grabbed
the foot when it next appeared, giving it a gentle tug.
It disappeared. I tried several more times with the
same results.
"Should I call 911?" my eldest daughter wanted to know.
"Maybe they could talk us through the trauma." (You
see a pattern here with the females in my house?)
"Let's get Ernie to the vet," I said grimly. We drove to
the vet with my son holding the cage in his lap.
"Breathe, Ernie, breathe," he urged.
"I don't think lizards do Lamaze," his mother noted to
him. (Women can be so cruel to their own young. I
mean what she does to me is one thing, but this boy
is of her womb, for G~d's sake.).
The vet took Ernie back to the examining room and
peered at the little animal through a magnifying glass.
"What do you think, Doc, a C-section?" I suggested
scientifically.
"Oh, very interesting," he murmured. "Mr. and Mrs.
Cameron, may I speak to you privately for a moment?"
I gulped, nodding for my son to step outside.
"Is Ernie going to be okay?" my wife asked.
"Oh, perfectly," the vet assured us. "This lizard is not
in labor. In fact, that isn't EVER going to happen. . .
Ernie is a boy. You see, Ernie is a young male. And
occasionally, as they come into maturity, like most
male species, they um . . um . . . masturbate. Just
the way he did, lying on his back." He blushed,
glancing at my wife.
We were silent, absorbing this.
"So, Ernie's just . just . . . excited," my wife offered.
"Exactly," the vet replied , relieved that we understood.
More silence. Then my vicious, cruel wife started to
giggle. And giggle. And then even laugh loudly.
"What's so funny?" I demanded, knowing, but not
believing that the woman I married would commit
the upcoming affront to my flawless manliness.
Tears were now running down her face. "It's just .that . .
I'm picturing you pulling on its . . . its. . teeny little . . "
She gasped for more air to bellow in laughter once
more.
"That's enough," I warned. We thanked the vet and
hurriedly bundled the lizard and our son back into
the car.. He was glad everything was going to be okay.
"I know Ernie's really thankful for what you did, Dad,"
he told me.
"Oh, you have NO idea," my wife agreed, collapsing
with laughter.
Two lizards: $140.
One cage: $50.
Trip to the vet: $30.
Memory of your husband pulling on a lizard's winkie:
Priceless!
Moral of the story: Pay attention in biology class.
Lizards lay eggs!
TOD
"Lizard Birth"
If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through
the pet syndrome, including toilet flush burials for dead
goldfish, the story below will have you laughing out
LOUD!
Overview: I had to take my son's lizard to the vet.
Here's what happened:
Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me
there was "something wrong" with one of the two
lizards he holds prisoner in his room.
"He's just lying there looking sick," he told me. "I'm
serious, Dad. Can you help?"
I put my best lizard-healer expression on my face and
followed him into his bedroom. One of the little lizards
was indeed lying on his back, looking stressed. I
immediately knew what to do.
"Honey," I called, "come look at the lizard!"
"Oh, my gosh!" my wife exclaimed. "She's having
babies."
"What?" my son demanded. "But their names are
Bert and Ernie, Mom!"
I was equally outraged.
"Hey, how can that be? I thought we said we didn't
want them to reproduce," I said accusingly to my wife.
"Well, what do you want me to do, post a sign in their
cage?" she inquired (I think she actually said this
sarcastically!)
"No, but you were supposed to get two boys!" I
reminded her, (in my most loving, calm, sweet
voice, while gritting my teeth).
"Yeah, Bert and Ernie!" my son agreed.
"Well, it's just a little hard to tell on some guys, you
know," she informed me (Again with the sarcasm!).
By now the rest of the family had gathered to see
what was going on. I shrugged, deciding to make
the best of it.
"Kids, this is going to be a wondrous experience,"
I announced. "We're about to witness the miracle
of birth."
"Oh, gross!" they shrieked
"Well, isn't THAT just great? What are we going to do
with a litter of tiny little lizard babies?" my wife wanted
to know.
We peered at the patient. After much struggling, what
looked like a tiny foot would appear briefly, vanishing
a scant second later.
"We don't appear to be making much progress," I
noted.
"It's breech," my wife whispered, horrified.
"Do something, Dad!" my son urged.
"Okay, okay." Squeamishly, I reached in and grabbed
the foot when it next appeared, giving it a gentle tug.
It disappeared. I tried several more times with the
same results.
"Should I call 911?" my eldest daughter wanted to know.
"Maybe they could talk us through the trauma." (You
see a pattern here with the females in my house?)
"Let's get Ernie to the vet," I said grimly. We drove to
the vet with my son holding the cage in his lap.
"Breathe, Ernie, breathe," he urged.
"I don't think lizards do Lamaze," his mother noted to
him. (Women can be so cruel to their own young. I
mean what she does to me is one thing, but this boy
is of her womb, for G~d's sake.).
The vet took Ernie back to the examining room and
peered at the little animal through a magnifying glass.
"What do you think, Doc, a C-section?" I suggested
scientifically.
"Oh, very interesting," he murmured. "Mr. and Mrs.
Cameron, may I speak to you privately for a moment?"
I gulped, nodding for my son to step outside.
"Is Ernie going to be okay?" my wife asked.
"Oh, perfectly," the vet assured us. "This lizard is not
in labor. In fact, that isn't EVER going to happen. . .
Ernie is a boy. You see, Ernie is a young male. And
occasionally, as they come into maturity, like most
male species, they um . . um . . . masturbate. Just
the way he did, lying on his back." He blushed,
glancing at my wife.
We were silent, absorbing this.
"So, Ernie's just . just . . . excited," my wife offered.
"Exactly," the vet replied , relieved that we understood.
More silence. Then my vicious, cruel wife started to
giggle. And giggle. And then even laugh loudly.
"What's so funny?" I demanded, knowing, but not
believing that the woman I married would commit
the upcoming affront to my flawless manliness.
Tears were now running down her face. "It's just .that . .
I'm picturing you pulling on its . . . its. . teeny little . . "
She gasped for more air to bellow in laughter once
more.
"That's enough," I warned. We thanked the vet and
hurriedly bundled the lizard and our son back into
the car.. He was glad everything was going to be okay.
"I know Ernie's really thankful for what you did, Dad,"
he told me.
"Oh, you have NO idea," my wife agreed, collapsing
with laughter.
Two lizards: $140.
One cage: $50.
Trip to the vet: $30.
Memory of your husband pulling on a lizard's winkie:
Priceless!
Moral of the story: Pay attention in biology class.
Lizards lay eggs!
TOD
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 4,966
Butter it's about time you stopped in! You little jet-setter you! I thought maybe you forgot about us boring ladies! Ha! But I do keep up on you via our other link. Some very pretty pics you have there of your excursions! This is a trip of a lifetime it looks like! You have seen more in America than I have! That's no joke!
Allfor I'm so very happy that you get this second chance at pregnancy and mommy-hood! This time to do it differently than before. To spend it together with hubby and son. To take part in any and all that you missed that first time around. Are you going for a natural type birth where you take Lamaze classes? (Or so they were called way back in the day)
Munchkin I'm also looking forward to tales from the North! But it looks like you have many from your cruises too. You've lived a very interesting and varied life!
Happy I'm glad your weather has been nice and you are enjoying your garden. So you are at a similar place as me in life? Embracing the ordinary of life? My favorite days are those filled with calm and quiet. Right at this moment standing outside on my back porch I have peace and tranquility. A gentle breeze....clouds becoming a little thicker and what looks like the beginnings of a light afternoon shower. Perfect!
Charley I'm happy for you too! Glad that your meeting went well! I see you as someone that is moving on with life....and career. Someone who refuses to let anyone hold her back or let other's insecurities effect her negatively. Yay for Charley! So very proud of you!
TOD I see you as similar to charley in that way too. Someone who will go out there and make it happen! Not wait for someone else to maybe get it done! This is what it looks like you've done all your life. Go out there and get what you needed in life. A person of action! Never underestimate the power of a woman!
Blue my good friend, don't worry if you can't pm me. I understand you have a busy life! I appreciate you were concerned for me.
The meeting went ok. My daughter was with me and kicked my foot under the desk to signal for me to shut up. Ha! But the whole meeting made me feel like the three teachers of my daughter's were in cahoots with one another. You know the type that sit around all day complaining about their student's, their parents, the standards and/or their admin? Like they are perfect teachers and it's all these other influences that they are fighting against? They never want to try to understand. They never want to try to solve the problem in another way? Just looking for excuses! Well that is how my daughter's psychologist, vision teacher and class teacher acted in the meeting. My daughter brought up an excellent point. That my daughter is a tween now. That to use her slant board, her large print books, her magnifier makes her stand out. That she doesn't want to feel different. She wants to be like the other kids in her class. Is that such a hard concept to grasp? That might be why she resists using them and doesn't want help? But oh no there must be some terrible thing happening in her life right now? But, mind you this is the first I'm hearing about this? Really? Something so serious? Not a phone call? Not a letter sent home? I'm really getting annoyed with these people and can't wait for Laila to go to 5th grade and get a new teacher! Yes, I do think this new class will be better for her. It is an inclusion classroom. A classroom within a classroom. 12 regular students and 12 special Ed all in the same class with two teachers present. My daughter happens to know and like this teacher already. But she will still have the same vision teacher (wish she could be replaced though...she looks like trouble to me) and this new psychologist. Ugh!
I will become a lot more active I think. Since my addiction/recovery I've kind of stood back from active participation. But no I don't think I will anymore.
Allfor I'm so very happy that you get this second chance at pregnancy and mommy-hood! This time to do it differently than before. To spend it together with hubby and son. To take part in any and all that you missed that first time around. Are you going for a natural type birth where you take Lamaze classes? (Or so they were called way back in the day)
Munchkin I'm also looking forward to tales from the North! But it looks like you have many from your cruises too. You've lived a very interesting and varied life!
Happy I'm glad your weather has been nice and you are enjoying your garden. So you are at a similar place as me in life? Embracing the ordinary of life? My favorite days are those filled with calm and quiet. Right at this moment standing outside on my back porch I have peace and tranquility. A gentle breeze....clouds becoming a little thicker and what looks like the beginnings of a light afternoon shower. Perfect!
Charley I'm happy for you too! Glad that your meeting went well! I see you as someone that is moving on with life....and career. Someone who refuses to let anyone hold her back or let other's insecurities effect her negatively. Yay for Charley! So very proud of you!
TOD I see you as similar to charley in that way too. Someone who will go out there and make it happen! Not wait for someone else to maybe get it done! This is what it looks like you've done all your life. Go out there and get what you needed in life. A person of action! Never underestimate the power of a woman!
Blue my good friend, don't worry if you can't pm me. I understand you have a busy life! I appreciate you were concerned for me.
The meeting went ok. My daughter was with me and kicked my foot under the desk to signal for me to shut up. Ha! But the whole meeting made me feel like the three teachers of my daughter's were in cahoots with one another. You know the type that sit around all day complaining about their student's, their parents, the standards and/or their admin? Like they are perfect teachers and it's all these other influences that they are fighting against? They never want to try to understand. They never want to try to solve the problem in another way? Just looking for excuses! Well that is how my daughter's psychologist, vision teacher and class teacher acted in the meeting. My daughter brought up an excellent point. That my daughter is a tween now. That to use her slant board, her large print books, her magnifier makes her stand out. That she doesn't want to feel different. She wants to be like the other kids in her class. Is that such a hard concept to grasp? That might be why she resists using them and doesn't want help? But oh no there must be some terrible thing happening in her life right now? But, mind you this is the first I'm hearing about this? Really? Something so serious? Not a phone call? Not a letter sent home? I'm really getting annoyed with these people and can't wait for Laila to go to 5th grade and get a new teacher! Yes, I do think this new class will be better for her. It is an inclusion classroom. A classroom within a classroom. 12 regular students and 12 special Ed all in the same class with two teachers present. My daughter happens to know and like this teacher already. But she will still have the same vision teacher (wish she could be replaced though...she looks like trouble to me) and this new psychologist. Ugh!
I will become a lot more active I think. Since my addiction/recovery I've kind of stood back from active participation. But no I don't think I will anymore.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Canada.
Posts: 795
Clean, I'm so glad the meeting went well. I know exactly about those kinds of teachers, one of the reasons I no longer teach. You are an awesome parent and you have the benefit of an education background too, good for you for standing up! You know your daughter better than anyone and your other daughter is right! Tweens/teens are all about fitting in and she will have to function in a world that doesn't cater much to anyone! So good for you for standing up for her and wanting her to be all she can be! I admire your daughter for not wanting to take the easy way out too, for working hard to do what comes naturally to some! She should be applauded by those teachers, not admonished! Ugh that really gets me going!
Allfor, I bet you are the most adorable pregnant lady! You should have a nice little bump now, right? I have a coworker due in Oct, and she is so cute right now! There's something about a baby bump that people just want to touch
Enjoy this precious time
Butter, it sounds like you are having a wonderful adventure! I'd love to hear more! I love Vegas too, the lights, the colours, the action. I'm an introvert but Vegas is awesome for me. And you won money even, so cool!
Happy, thank you for the book recommendation. I brought it up to H, and that opened the door a bit for a discussion. he said he's ready to sit with me and really open up, sometime when we have no kid distractions, and we can just talk. I know it's dark in there but I'm ready to hear what he has to say.
Ugh, Tod, your stinking mess must've been gross ... I'm eating lunch right now and trying not to think about it! but the Lizard story is cute
Just a thought ... you say when you mention pain pills to Jethro he gets upset. Have you tried to not mention them? Just walk away when he talks about them or takes one? Let your feet do the talking for you? I tried that with H and it works, he sensed my displeasure far more that way than anything I could ever say. I am also trying to do that when he gets in a mood. Sends a message words couldn't!
Munchkin, interesting that you have noticed a change in yourself since quitting. I am hoping that H "depuffs" also ... his face has gotten very puffy with the heavy drinking. It's a certain look, isn't it ... once you recognize it on one person, it's amazing how many people you see the same puffiness on. I'm happy to hear it goes away! I'd love to hear more about your cruise.
Blue, I owe you a pm.
Well I'm all moved and set up again. using the old desks until the new ones come in. I have this wonderful window beside me now ... we have one of the most beautiful campuses in the country and it's a real treat to be able to see some of it every day now. Lots of trees and grass too so it's almost tropical out there, except for the temperature, lol, cool today and rainy. But rain is good! Just wish it was a thunderstorm
Allfor, I bet you are the most adorable pregnant lady! You should have a nice little bump now, right? I have a coworker due in Oct, and she is so cute right now! There's something about a baby bump that people just want to touch
Enjoy this precious time Butter, it sounds like you are having a wonderful adventure! I'd love to hear more! I love Vegas too, the lights, the colours, the action. I'm an introvert but Vegas is awesome for me. And you won money even, so cool!
Happy, thank you for the book recommendation. I brought it up to H, and that opened the door a bit for a discussion. he said he's ready to sit with me and really open up, sometime when we have no kid distractions, and we can just talk. I know it's dark in there but I'm ready to hear what he has to say.
Ugh, Tod, your stinking mess must've been gross ... I'm eating lunch right now and trying not to think about it! but the Lizard story is cute
Just a thought ... you say when you mention pain pills to Jethro he gets upset. Have you tried to not mention them? Just walk away when he talks about them or takes one? Let your feet do the talking for you? I tried that with H and it works, he sensed my displeasure far more that way than anything I could ever say. I am also trying to do that when he gets in a mood. Sends a message words couldn't!
Munchkin, interesting that you have noticed a change in yourself since quitting. I am hoping that H "depuffs" also ... his face has gotten very puffy with the heavy drinking. It's a certain look, isn't it ... once you recognize it on one person, it's amazing how many people you see the same puffiness on. I'm happy to hear it goes away! I'd love to hear more about your cruise.
Blue, I owe you a pm.
Well I'm all moved and set up again. using the old desks until the new ones come in. I have this wonderful window beside me now ... we have one of the most beautiful campuses in the country and it's a real treat to be able to see some of it every day now. Lots of trees and grass too so it's almost tropical out there, except for the temperature, lol, cool today and rainy. But rain is good! Just wish it was a thunderstorm
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
For everyone reading our Thread! There is a Newsletter scheduled to be sent to everyone's email address from SR! To weigh in on this news? Here's the link to the story! Spreading the word so everyone is aware of it!
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ding-week.html
TOD
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ding-week.html
TOD
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