Originally Posted by SillyHuman

Step 3 has been a source of frustration in the past because I feel like I have to pretend to have hope in something that does not exist. I do not want to lie. The weirdness of "Fake it until you make it," never worked for me. I thought about using something like "the universe" as an HP.

Then it occurred to me, existence itself encompasses all the power there is. Existence is the real HP.

I took it for a test drive down 12-step lane, ignoring mentions of prayer.

Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to existence, as we understood existence. "Let go and let god" is simplified to "Let go."

Admitted to existence, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. This is redundant, but I have no issues with it. I suppose I could read my fifth step to a mountain top or something, but that seems unnecessary and reductive.

We're entirely ready to have existence remove all these defects of character.

Step 7 just does not work.

Sought through meditation to improve our conscious contact with existence. Will and power are pointless since existence gets it way by default.

This feels simple, real and peaceful to me. I could use "reality," but existence feels complete. I suppose some would say it is too passive, since it is surrendering to what is, rather than something more complicated. I guess one could critique that existence is not personal to me. I dunno, my existence is pretty personal to me, but isn't the whole point of the steps to get out of self? I cannot see how groveling to an imaginary daddy in the sky, who is personal, would accomplish that.

Thoughts? If anyone has suggestions or thoughts on any of it, particularly 7, I would very much appreciate it.