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Old 06-15-2019, 01:17 PM   #41 (permalink)
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^^^^

Or...
Quote:
Help them by asking "Where is the last place you saw it?"
If they knew that, it wouldn't be lost!
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Old 06-16-2019, 09:26 AM   #42 (permalink)
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Indeed, she is.....I did not realise that she is your dog TS. What a stunner.
unfortunately not my dog.
molly has been at a rescue ive been volunteering at for a while now. shes been there about 2 months and i spend time with her every time im there.shes a doll. loves everyone and all dogs and happyhappyhappy. she got adopted friday-YAY!!!! she was dog #78 i would have loved to adopt.
dis is my dog-pete thedog. yes-he has a middle name and its "thedog." the grass is reallyreallyreallyreally tall in this pic.
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Old 06-16-2019, 09:33 AM   #43 (permalink)
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A Honeymoon Couple

A honeymoon couple is in the Watergate Hotel in Washington. The bride is concerned, and asks, “What if the place is still bugged?”

The groom says, “I’ll look for a bug.” He looks behind the drapes, behind the pictures, under the rug. Finally, he says, “AHA!” Under the rug was a disc with four screws. He gets his Swiss army knife, unscrews the screws, throws them and the disc out the window.

The next morning, the hotel manager asks the newlyweds, “How was your room? How was the service? How was your stay at the Watergate Hotel?”

The groom says, “Why are you asking me all of these questions?”

The hotel manager says, “Well, the couple in the room UNDER you complained that the chandelier fell on them.”
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Old 06-16-2019, 09:33 AM   #44 (permalink)
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Late Night Lecture

Ron Chestnut, 89 years of age, was stopped by the police about 2 am and was asked where he was going at that time of night.

Ron replied, “I’m on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late.”

The officer asked, “Really? Who’s giving that lecture at this time of night?”

Ron replied, “That would be my wife.”
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Old 06-16-2019, 09:36 AM   #45 (permalink)
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Pete the-dog Dog is AWESOME!!!!
Thank you.....and yey re Molly!!! Very good news. xx

And funny jokes....heard the old dude one a ton of times, but the chandelier at the Watergate is still causing giggles here!
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Old 06-16-2019, 09:55 AM   #46 (permalink)
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Pete is one happy dog, he probably reads your jokes!!

Yay for Molly and for whoever had the big heart and adopted her.

I wanna go with Calvin!!!

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Old 06-16-2019, 12:59 PM   #47 (permalink)
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tomsteve...so much dog love in your life! And....you give so much love to dogs....
In fact...some have said..."tomsteve has gone to the dogs".....
lol.
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Old 06-16-2019, 02:35 PM   #48 (permalink)
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In fact...some have said..."tomsteve has gone to the dogs".....
lol.
considering who/what i used to be, thats positive progress!!
i am a wee bit of crazy dog guy.
choose garage sales by IF they have a dog,meet the dogs before seein whats for sale......
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Old 06-17-2019, 01:13 AM   #49 (permalink)
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Men’s Help Line

“Hello, my name is Bob. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Hi Bob, I really need your advice on a serious problem.

I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me.

The usual signs: If the phone rings and I answer, the caller hangs up. She goes out with ‘the girls’ a lot. I try to stay awake to look out for her when she comes home, but I usually fall asleep.

Anyway, last night about midnight, I hid in the shed behind the boat. When she came home, she got out of someone’s car buttoning her blouse, then she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on.

It was at that moment, crouched behind the boat, that I noticed a hairline crack in the outboard motor mounting bracket.

Is that something I can weld, or do I need to replace the whole bracket?”
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Old 06-17-2019, 04:43 AM   #50 (permalink)
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^^^^









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Go against the grain.
Don’t be made timid by worried rejection.
Let nature’s curious wisdom fill you.
Let the world’s mystical heritage guide you.
Paint your canvasses,
play your tunes.
~Thomas Moore
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Old 06-17-2019, 06:46 AM   #51 (permalink)
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That was just brilliant TS.....sharing with husband.
And his entire office......
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Old 06-17-2019, 01:53 PM   #52 (permalink)
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Never too old to dance like you mean it!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LY-rNjd-ZQU

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Paint your canvasses,
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Old 06-17-2019, 02:13 PM   #53 (permalink)
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"So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key."
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"We call them dumb animals, and so they are, for they cannot tell us how they feel, but they do not suffer less because they have no words."
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Old 06-17-2019, 03:09 PM   #54 (permalink)
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Oh suki, so glad you posted that here as well.....I have a new joy in my life called Quilted Northern Ultra Plush.....it has an 'end', gued softly, that comes up and says HI...I AM SO HAPPY TO SERVE YOU!!! Truly, 'tis a miracle. xx
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"It may be raining, but there's a rainbow above you..." The Eagles, Desperado
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Old 06-19-2019, 04:42 PM   #55 (permalink)
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I keep going back to this, lol. Surely there must be a better way. How many times have you gone 3 times around the roll and then had to make the plies and squares match? Fess up now, we've ALL done it.








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Don’t be made timid by worried rejection.
Let nature’s curious wisdom fill you.
Let the world’s mystical heritage guide you.
Paint your canvasses,
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~Thomas Moore
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Old 06-20-2019, 12:49 AM   #56 (permalink)
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If they don't, turn the top layer round the roll. They'll fit together then! What I hate is the machines in public toilets, skinning my knuckles against the jaggy edge looking for the tail. What I want to know is if all women hate that so much, why don't youse all do what I do and make sure to leave a tail for the next chick into the cubicle!!
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Old 06-20-2019, 03:20 AM   #57 (permalink)
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^^^^









whaaat? wouldnt that be sumthin a mens helpline should be able to answer?
that, and
how do i drive to the hospital while bleeding profusely?
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Old 06-20-2019, 06:03 AM   #58 (permalink)
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If they don't, turn the top layer round the roll. They'll fit together then! What I hate is the machines in public toilets, skinning my knuckles against the jaggy edge looking for the tail. What I want to know is if all women hate that so much, why don't youse all do what I do and make sure to leave a tail for the next chick into the cubicle!!


Toots, I do that, really I do, I leave a tail every single time.

What about when one roll is empty...and you can't quite reach the new roll to begin...and you dang near get your arm stuck up in the machine clear up to the elbow!!!!

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Let nature’s curious wisdom fill you.
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Paint your canvasses,
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~Thomas Moore
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Old 06-20-2019, 12:22 PM   #59 (permalink)
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Old 06-20-2019, 12:25 PM   #60 (permalink)
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Parking lot in front of the laser eye surgery center.
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