ibhmn

Well, here I go. Any suggestions for dealing with withdrawal and an enabling spouse?

GhostInTheRuins

I like to grab a coffee, jump in the car, point it in a random direction, put in some sick, loud, angry, heavy metal and drive around for a couple hours exploring. I stay off the expressways, they're boring.

mertyl

can i ask how your spouse is an enabler?

ibhmn

She needs eliminate or greatly reduce her consumtion too. I think the prospect of me quitting is threatening to her on some level...

Anna

It probably is threatening to her because she sees a change emerging. But, she doesn't need to eliminate or greatly reduce her consumption for you to carry on along your road to sobriety. I hope that does, but it's separate from what you are doing for yourself.

The best you can do is move forward and be a good example to your wife.

mertyl

I know what you mean now. Many people are afraid of the outcome of positive change. I too was afraid of me cleaning up and my partner being left behind, and it threatens the relationship a bit because of one moving forward. So the other tries to compensate by bringing you the drug of choice or alcohol to make you feel like its completely normal.

If you really want to be sober, do it for you and hopefully, she will follow in your footsteps, seeing its not so bad to be sober together.
Anna posted something above that is really good. And I wish you good luck. you are on the right track. In order to not cave into someone offering you something you have no control over, you will need to be strong.

god bless
mertyl

CarolD

Welcome to SR!..

Take care of yourself first
That is he fact when dealing with recovery.

Blessings to both of you...