A couple more questions...
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 45
A couple more questions...
Ok, I'm going to be going on day 3 now starting tommorow and this is usually about the time during my detox where my mind begins to start feeling foggy, spacey, zoned-out, numb, disconnected, anesthetized, etc, etc (in fact, I'm already experiencing this now). Is this normal and how long does this particular part of the recovery process last?.
Also, I drank between 4-12 beers almost every day for about 6-7 months. Would I be considered a light, moderate or heavy drinker and was I headed for a quick, early death at the rate I was going. I mean, is this considered some pretty serious drinking?. Is it "too late" for me?.
Well, I had another question but I forgot it and the spacebar on my keyboard is acting up for whatever reason. I'm not having too much trouble with cravings but this spacy/foggy feeling in my head is about to drive me nuts and it happens every time I try to quit and is the primary reason I always pick up another drink...except not this time!.
- Regards, S4E
Also, I drank between 4-12 beers almost every day for about 6-7 months. Would I be considered a light, moderate or heavy drinker and was I headed for a quick, early death at the rate I was going. I mean, is this considered some pretty serious drinking?. Is it "too late" for me?.
Well, I had another question but I forgot it and the spacebar on my keyboard is acting up for whatever reason. I'm not having too much trouble with cravings but this spacy/foggy feeling in my head is about to drive me nuts and it happens every time I try to quit and is the primary reason I always pick up another drink...except not this time!.
- Regards, S4E
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 45
It's 4:34AM here right now. I'm beginning my third day of sobriety. I woke up with a mild case of the sweats at about 2:30AM this morning (presumably due to my body sweating out the poison). I could'nt get back to sleep (presumably due to withdrawl) and so I made a pot of coffee and have been sitting at the computer working on my online business for the last few hours. That foggy/spacy/zone-out feeling is still there but I hav'nt experienced any cravings so far. Alcohol changes the brain so fundamentally that once you quit, your left with a "void" that alcohol once filled and that's what leads a lot of people to begin drinking again...so they can feel "normal". Anyway so here I sit just sharing my detox experience for whatever it's worth. I hope to help other people here once I can get on my own two feet. It's a struggle. Not so much because of any "cravings" but because of what my brain percieves as "abnormal" in the absence of alcohol.
- Regards, S4E
- Regards, S4E
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: in a better place
Posts: 1,406
Hi S4E,
I hope I can answer some of your questions while the rest of the country is asleep. I live in France currently so I'm wide awake. They'll be along later to answer with more accuracy and experience.
I thought I was a pretty heavy drinker at 2 bottles of wine or a 1/2 Liter of vodka topped of with a few beers each day. I've learned by the folks here that each and every person has their individual capacity for consumption and each body reacts differently (and that I was light compared to some REALLY heavy drinkers). There is no way to measure the amount of booze and say, "yep, that counts as medium". If your head and your body are telling you that it's too much, then it's too much.
It's also hard to tell if you're heading for a slow and painful death or a quick and painful death, but in the end you'll still be dead if you keep on drinking and sliding down the slippery slope of alcoholism. It sounds to me like you are catching things before they become disasterous. Some people end up in jail, some people end up on the hospital bed having their death certificate signed (yeah, really) before they wake up and realize they HAVE to make a change.
I think I caught things before they were disasterous too. I still have a husband, family, home, friends, money. I just lost the ability to drink normally. It's an OK thing to lose if you ask me.
Your fogginess, sleeplessness, restlessness will all eventually fade away in time. Drink plenty of water to flush your system. Take some vitamins, eat healthy food and excersie. Any positive action you take will get you closer to your goal of feeling better.
And stick around for some more replies.
I hope I can answer some of your questions while the rest of the country is asleep. I live in France currently so I'm wide awake. They'll be along later to answer with more accuracy and experience.
I thought I was a pretty heavy drinker at 2 bottles of wine or a 1/2 Liter of vodka topped of with a few beers each day. I've learned by the folks here that each and every person has their individual capacity for consumption and each body reacts differently (and that I was light compared to some REALLY heavy drinkers). There is no way to measure the amount of booze and say, "yep, that counts as medium". If your head and your body are telling you that it's too much, then it's too much.
It's also hard to tell if you're heading for a slow and painful death or a quick and painful death, but in the end you'll still be dead if you keep on drinking and sliding down the slippery slope of alcoholism. It sounds to me like you are catching things before they become disasterous. Some people end up in jail, some people end up on the hospital bed having their death certificate signed (yeah, really) before they wake up and realize they HAVE to make a change.
I think I caught things before they were disasterous too. I still have a husband, family, home, friends, money. I just lost the ability to drink normally. It's an OK thing to lose if you ask me.
Your fogginess, sleeplessness, restlessness will all eventually fade away in time. Drink plenty of water to flush your system. Take some vitamins, eat healthy food and excersie. Any positive action you take will get you closer to your goal of feeling better.
And stick around for some more replies.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 363
Hi S4E
Sounds like you're experiencing the exact same withdrawal symptoms I've had.
Day 3 however things really did start to get better. I felt better each day after that.
You only have to experience this once. I made the mistake of relapsing several times and each time, the withdrawal was a little bit worse.
Drink plenty of water, gatorade is good too. Vitamins, especially B1 will help. Try to eat even a little, small meals every couple of hours helps.
Good luck
Mongo
Sounds like you're experiencing the exact same withdrawal symptoms I've had.
Day 3 however things really did start to get better. I felt better each day after that.
You only have to experience this once. I made the mistake of relapsing several times and each time, the withdrawal was a little bit worse.
Drink plenty of water, gatorade is good too. Vitamins, especially B1 will help. Try to eat even a little, small meals every couple of hours helps.
Good luck
Mongo
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 45
You people have been so helpful and supportive in getting me through this very difficult period in my detox and I really am greatful for that and OH MY YES...the cravings are getting stronger and stronger...yikes!!. It's sink or swim now.
You know, in addition to the withrawal symptoms and the "I want to have a drink just so I can feel normal" crap, another reason I "had" to drink every day was so that I could become less inhibited. I grew up in an ultra-strict Baptist household where just using the word "darn" could get your head knocked off. Sex was taboo as was any discussion of it. I was practically raised in the church because everything we did revolved around some sort of religious activity (ie; prayer meetings, morning and evening services, church outings, church football, sunday school, church feild trips, etc). We even spent several years in missionary training where we had to live in the jungle and build our own hut, beds, adobe stove and literally live off of snakes, edible vegetation, crawdads, fish, etc). There was also abuse in the household and I ran away from home, ended up out on the streets, etc.
Anyway, back to the religious background part. Having grown up in such a strict ernvironment caused me to have all kinds of issues so that when I'm sober, I'm a total ultra-conservative prude who is afraid to even touch himself "down there" lest I end up going to Hell or something but after a few drinks and all the inhibitions begin to fade away, I can go over to my clean and loyal girlfriend's house for a night of beer, pizza, romance, chatting away for hours and just totally enjoying myself. I could NEVER do this sober because of my strict Baptist upbringing - even though she is a knock-out (in my opinion) and just a very delightful and fun person to be around. Also, because I suffer from Tourette's and am very short in height, if I gave her up, I'd probably be a bachelor for the rest of my life.
Well, there I am like some kind of open book. My guts spilled for all the world to see. I just hope I can get through this because I'll be honest...right now, I could sure go for an icey-cold...ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!
- Regards, S4E
You know, in addition to the withrawal symptoms and the "I want to have a drink just so I can feel normal" crap, another reason I "had" to drink every day was so that I could become less inhibited. I grew up in an ultra-strict Baptist household where just using the word "darn" could get your head knocked off. Sex was taboo as was any discussion of it. I was practically raised in the church because everything we did revolved around some sort of religious activity (ie; prayer meetings, morning and evening services, church outings, church football, sunday school, church feild trips, etc). We even spent several years in missionary training where we had to live in the jungle and build our own hut, beds, adobe stove and literally live off of snakes, edible vegetation, crawdads, fish, etc). There was also abuse in the household and I ran away from home, ended up out on the streets, etc.
Anyway, back to the religious background part. Having grown up in such a strict ernvironment caused me to have all kinds of issues so that when I'm sober, I'm a total ultra-conservative prude who is afraid to even touch himself "down there" lest I end up going to Hell or something but after a few drinks and all the inhibitions begin to fade away, I can go over to my clean and loyal girlfriend's house for a night of beer, pizza, romance, chatting away for hours and just totally enjoying myself. I could NEVER do this sober because of my strict Baptist upbringing - even though she is a knock-out (in my opinion) and just a very delightful and fun person to be around. Also, because I suffer from Tourette's and am very short in height, if I gave her up, I'd probably be a bachelor for the rest of my life.
Well, there I am like some kind of open book. My guts spilled for all the world to see. I just hope I can get through this because I'll be honest...right now, I could sure go for an icey-cold...ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!
- Regards, S4E
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Somwhere over the rainbow
Posts: 1,175
Soberever... like the name, keep writing and sharing your experience. I know I've managed to piece minutes into hours, hours into days and days into weeks doing that. I have also found your thought process to be intriguing.
My experience with the fuzzy head is it usually subsides when your sleeping returns to normal. Just keep on keeping on.
Levi
My experience with the fuzzy head is it usually subsides when your sleeping returns to normal. Just keep on keeping on.
Levi
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Join Date: Jan 2006
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Posts: 45
Thank's Levi
I also find that I tend to "talk myself" into drinking again (at least that's what I'm told). For example, I'll actually talk to myself (out-loud, two-way conversation...the whole bit). It sounds something like this...
ME: "Let me ask you a question"
ME2: "Yeah?"
ME: "What would you *really* like to do right now if drinking was'nt an issue for you and you could do whatever you wanted?"
ME2: "Ok, well first of all, I'd go grab a case of beer. Then after a couple of beers and I was feeling pretty good, I'd thin-slice some boneless chicken breasts and marinate them in fresh garlic, ginger, sesame seeds/oil and some chinese BBQ sauce. Then, I'd prep some chinese veggies and stir-fry sauce for this evening's meal and later, put the chicken on skewers and whip up a batch of stir-fried rice. Then, I'd go get more beer and invite my girlfriend over for dinner and a romantic evening"
ME: "That's a bunch of BS and you know you'd be right back to drinking and feeling like crap again!"
ME2: "Ohhhhh pleeeeaaassseeee...it would be sooooo much fun"
Anyway, you all get the picture. Sometimes the other "me" would win and sometimes (at least for a little while) the real me would win. Then again, if your a religeous person, maybe it was the Devil himself tempting me.
Sorry for talking so much but if I'd talking, at least I'm not drinking
- Regards, S4E
I also find that I tend to "talk myself" into drinking again (at least that's what I'm told). For example, I'll actually talk to myself (out-loud, two-way conversation...the whole bit). It sounds something like this...
ME: "Let me ask you a question"
ME2: "Yeah?"
ME: "What would you *really* like to do right now if drinking was'nt an issue for you and you could do whatever you wanted?"
ME2: "Ok, well first of all, I'd go grab a case of beer. Then after a couple of beers and I was feeling pretty good, I'd thin-slice some boneless chicken breasts and marinate them in fresh garlic, ginger, sesame seeds/oil and some chinese BBQ sauce. Then, I'd prep some chinese veggies and stir-fry sauce for this evening's meal and later, put the chicken on skewers and whip up a batch of stir-fried rice. Then, I'd go get more beer and invite my girlfriend over for dinner and a romantic evening"
ME: "That's a bunch of BS and you know you'd be right back to drinking and feeling like crap again!"
ME2: "Ohhhhh pleeeeaaassseeee...it would be sooooo much fun"
Anyway, you all get the picture. Sometimes the other "me" would win and sometimes (at least for a little while) the real me would win. Then again, if your a religeous person, maybe it was the Devil himself tempting me.
Sorry for talking so much but if I'd talking, at least I'm not drinking
- Regards, S4E
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: in a better place
Posts: 1,406
I have Tourette's too. I always told myself that I drank to relax because stress increases my tics. I'm hoping that by taking out the alcohol and leveling my moods that it will serve to reduce the tics. I've got to believe that the ups and downs I was experiencing had to have caused more stress to my body than simply fending off the cravings for alcohol.
Right now I'm taking vitamin B (as was suggested by someone here) and I know that it's something I used to take for my tics too. Perhaps you can try that for a few weeks and see if you notice an improvement. Whatever you do, just give it time to actually make a difference. The easy thing is to say wtf and just give in too soon. I've done that before and don't plan to do it this time.
Right now I'm taking vitamin B (as was suggested by someone here) and I know that it's something I used to take for my tics too. Perhaps you can try that for a few weeks and see if you notice an improvement. Whatever you do, just give it time to actually make a difference. The easy thing is to say wtf and just give in too soon. I've done that before and don't plan to do it this time.
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: in a better place
Posts: 1,406
I completely relate to your conversations! I have them myself. I call the "other" voice my Evil Alcoholic Voice. I suppose the good voice is my HP but I don't really call it by a name. The problem is that EAV is REALLY loud and obnoxious and can easily talk right over the quiet, sane voice. I know that it's being quiet now though, and it's waiting. It knows there will be a time that it can jump out when I least expect it and convince me that it's going to be a nice little voice this time. Yeah, right. I hope I can recognize it when it happens.
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Somwhere over the rainbow
Posts: 1,175
I have the voice too... I end up having to get real loud back when it is really pushing my buttons. I call it my "user" or "addict" voice.
You know, when I was little and growing up, I swore I wouldn't be like my parents... now here I am struggling with similar issues... wonder if they had the "voice" too.
You know, when I was little and growing up, I swore I wouldn't be like my parents... now here I am struggling with similar issues... wonder if they had the "voice" too.
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 45
I've still got that bloated feeling (like I'm pregnant or something) and the cravings for alcohol are so intense that they are driving me to the brink of insanity. Then comes the despair and depression over the whole idea that I am losing the battle and perhaps someday, my life. I wish I was'nt an alcoholic. I wish I could be like "normal" people and just have a few beers and then STOP at that but as we all know, that's never really the way it works.
duck amuck
Join Date: May 2006
Location: SoCal
Posts: 27
Hi S4E
Now I'm craving thin-sliced boneless chicken breast and chinese vegetables!
I don't know if I'm qualified to be giving advice, but... can you go to an AA meeting? If not, is there an AA hotline in your town? AA has hotlines staffed by volunteers, it seems like that would be a good way to divert yourself if it's the middle of the night or you can't otherwise get to a meeting. I've called a couple of times myself. Check the yellow pages.
Hang in there, it gets better!
Now I'm craving thin-sliced boneless chicken breast and chinese vegetables!
I don't know if I'm qualified to be giving advice, but... can you go to an AA meeting? If not, is there an AA hotline in your town? AA has hotlines staffed by volunteers, it seems like that would be a good way to divert yourself if it's the middle of the night or you can't otherwise get to a meeting. I've called a couple of times myself. Check the yellow pages.
Hang in there, it gets better!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Livonia, MI
Posts: 675
Originally Posted by Sober4Ever
I wish I could be like "normal" people and just have a few beers and then STOP at that but as we all know, that's never really the way it works.
For me,......I may have WISHED I could drink like "normal" people, but,.....I never WANTED to drink like normal people. To me, going to a bar and having one or two was pointless. I drank to FEEL things. Things I that masked other things. So I may have wished, but I knew I never could.
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Join Date: Dec 2005
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I can so easily feel your pain. I've just decided to end my ride on the Moderation Madness Rollercoaster. It completely sucks that we have to be "this way", but there are so many people here that make it look like the other side is good too. You'll learn to enjoy drinking other fun drinks (there's even a thread about that) you'll actually taste the snacks or meal that you normally drank with, you'll remember what you did and said, and on and on.
I've gone through what you're going through. I decided to drink "moderately" after my sober month and the madness drove me back to being sober. Face your anger, sadness, pain, cravings. Identify it as your enemy and strive to beat it. We're here with you so keep posting. You can do this.
I've gone through what you're going through. I decided to drink "moderately" after my sober month and the madness drove me back to being sober. Face your anger, sadness, pain, cravings. Identify it as your enemy and strive to beat it. We're here with you so keep posting. You can do this.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 45
Well, some bad news )-:
I relapsed after 2-3 days of sobriety. I feel like I've let everyone down here who tried to lift me up and support me with advice and words of encouragement. I almost feel like I'm no longer part of the "in crowd" here because I slipped up and drank a beer this afternoon. I won't lie, it felt great and took away the horrible, gnawing, withdrawl symptoms and I'm back to my old "self" again but at what cost?.
You know, my step-grandfather was an alcoholic (he passed many years ago) as is my uncle so I guess there's a genetic component there and now I'm one (an alcoholic). I have been reading about a new drug that just recently came out on the market (Campral) and I have read story after story about how many people have had phenomenal success and swear by it. The ironic thing is, I went to see my doctor about getting some several months ago but got distracted and never ended up getting a prescription for it. However, just before I tried to quit this time around, I swore I had a bottle of the stuff laying around somewhere and I planned on taking it but could not locate it. Had I had some on hand, who knows what the outcome would have been but the next time I see her, I will make it my "mission in life" to insist on getting a prescription for it because this just can't go on.
Anyway, I'm off to get some work done but I'll be back here later...
- Regards, S4E (except today)
I relapsed after 2-3 days of sobriety. I feel like I've let everyone down here who tried to lift me up and support me with advice and words of encouragement. I almost feel like I'm no longer part of the "in crowd" here because I slipped up and drank a beer this afternoon. I won't lie, it felt great and took away the horrible, gnawing, withdrawl symptoms and I'm back to my old "self" again but at what cost?.
You know, my step-grandfather was an alcoholic (he passed many years ago) as is my uncle so I guess there's a genetic component there and now I'm one (an alcoholic). I have been reading about a new drug that just recently came out on the market (Campral) and I have read story after story about how many people have had phenomenal success and swear by it. The ironic thing is, I went to see my doctor about getting some several months ago but got distracted and never ended up getting a prescription for it. However, just before I tried to quit this time around, I swore I had a bottle of the stuff laying around somewhere and I planned on taking it but could not locate it. Had I had some on hand, who knows what the outcome would have been but the next time I see her, I will make it my "mission in life" to insist on getting a prescription for it because this just can't go on.
Anyway, I'm off to get some work done but I'll be back here later...
- Regards, S4E (except today)
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: in a better place
Posts: 1,406
First of all there is no "in crowd". Or maybe there is and I'm just not in it hmmm, oh but I digress. Second of all if there was an "in crowd" they probably all slipped at some point. So stop worrying about that and just get on with it. You had a beer. You enjoyed it. You stopped again. Great.
The worst thing you could do is throw in the towel because you had one beer and end up on a bender that sends you further down the slippery slope than you ever wanted to go.
The worst thing you could do is throw in the towel because you had one beer and end up on a bender that sends you further down the slippery slope than you ever wanted to go.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 45
c'est la vie, you are a TRUE inspiration, as are ALL of you!. Thank you so much for not judging me because I was so afraid of that. I guess I have to find a way to pick myself back up off of the floor again now...
- Regards, S4E
- Regards, S4E
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 363
You had 2/3 days sobriety. No one can take that from you.
I can't remember how many times I've slipped and had to get back on that horse.
Talking to your doctor about this is a really good idea. She may recommend a medication for you. There are several that help you quit drinking.
Good luck, S4E
Mongo
I can't remember how many times I've slipped and had to get back on that horse.
Talking to your doctor about this is a really good idea. She may recommend a medication for you. There are several that help you quit drinking.
Good luck, S4E
Mongo
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Livonia, MI
Posts: 675
One beer??? So what. Easily overcome. You ARE in the in-crowd. We are all IN this together. Now,...what you need to do is NOT be one of those who do the same things over and over and expect different results. Take a look at the days and events that led up to that one beer. What happened? What made you feel like you "needed" that beer? Did you isolate? Then go to a meeting,...go to the mall,...be among people. Did you white knuckle it? Then get active to take your mind off of it. Join a gym. Enroll in an adult class. Shoot hoops. Volunteer somewhere. Go jogging. Go to the zoo. Go to the movies. But whatever you do,...dont sit around trying to not drink WHILE thinking about how you cant drink. Dont do that to yourself. Please,...please......PLEASE!!!....dont just to the same things you did last time and expect it to work THIS time.
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