QTpye

Thanks so much to everyone!! I posted l/n for the first time about my ABF/ DOC- OC's... saying how it' s really killing me as well, draining me mentally, physically & emotionally. I never knew anything about this co-dependency
but everything you guys are telling me about it is right on!! Of course I would love to just jump into my recovery but as EVERYONE can/has told me & I very well KNOW it wont be that easy...
How do you just not care, or not rpeach or not drive past the spots when you cant find them at night?? How do you start to worry about yourself more & does it make me a weak person, being that I can catogorize myself into this co-dependency?

The last time I spoke to ABF was last nite around 8:30p.m. when he said he was going to "REST" we all know what that means. Any way said hed gimme a call in afew( usually takes about an hr. to kick in- so we say 2hrs) and still, no call, no text, no nada... You all know want to call right? I want to go to his house right??? But i'm not. Thats why im posting, I figure.. I post & I wont call. But its killin me cause i'm worrying. But at the same time, im thinking... SH*T if he cared, he would call. If he wasn't F*ed up, he would call. An dim slowly getting angry. Maybe it's better to get mad than get sucked in???

2dayzmuse

I know how frustrating the waiting can be. Try not to put your life on hold, live it. I know that takes a lot of work to accomplish. Good luck...

Luckyv2

Sometimes the only thing that we can do is let go. I know how hard it is. We need to focus on ourselves, we need to live a life for us and not anyone else. Not easy to do but it is also doable. Anyway just wanted to say hi and I am sending good thoughts your way.

Love Vic

Anna

Hi QT,

Letting go of the ones we love the most is so very difficult. But, sometimes it's just what we have to do in order to live our life. You deserve to take care of yourself.

QTpye

hello all. Everyone's been great! I can semi-happily say I haven't called his butt & havent spoken to him since last nite. I suppose if he gave 1/2 a rats ass he wouldv'e called, but IM POSITIVE hes too busy noddin' off... Goin' 2 sleeps gonna suck probably. This place gives great inspiration though!!! Thanks all!

Time4Change

We're glad you're here, QTpye! You give US inspiration and hope, too! It's so amazing how we all gain so much from helping each other. I love SR!

Hope you get some good sleep tonight. Check in tomorrow and let us know how it's going.

Kelly

QTpye

Well, abf contacted me tonite via txt. Said hes been so busy, although he has no job & thought I was in either school or work( after 3 yrs. he cnat remember when one ends & the other begins) anyway. I wanted to call him, but I didn't tooday, im angry. ANgry that Im letting myself/my life be affected by his addiction & mad thatI really believed he would stop & mad for all the lies... And this detachment stuff, I dunno. I just want to call him up & scream& be like... THERE ARE U HAPPY, U FINALLY LOST ME FOR THIS BULLSH*T!!!! Next, its your life, what??? DO I tell him why im not speaking to him, or do I jsut let this go on without saying a thing?