soxie

Let's see...where to start...I have been sober for a while now, I struggled with alcohol, narcotics, cigarettes, you name it, I had an addiction to it. I gave it all up about 6 months ago. I had a problem with drinking too much, and I quit drinking completely when I quit smoking cigarettes...as for me the two went hand in hand. If I have a drink now...it'll be one beer, or a glass of wine...but generally, I'd just rather not. I know my weakness...and liquor is one of them.

Quitting made me healthier, I can tell...and I am a completely different person than I used to be...but it also estranged me from a lot (actually, almost all) the people I used to think I was "close" to. Since I have been sober...I have lost most of my hang out buddies, and my best friend.

I am in a healthy, and happy relationship. But sometimes....some days, it's just really hard. It seems like it might be easier to just get drunk and try to forget....or to blow a line and slip into that world of delusion...because there, you don't care and life just seems so much easier. "Seems" Being the key word there.

Since I have become sober, I have begun to feel. The numbness wearing off...and facing reality. Some days...that reality seems too surreal......

Phinneas

Welcome to SR, soxie. Glad you found us!

Yup, I can sure relate to that. Removing the alcohol and drugs made me feel raw and vunerable. Nowhere to hide! Plus I got to feel again, something that I stopped doing a long time ago. We get to live life on life's terms now, I guess, and some days are harder than others.

Congrats on your clean and sober time. I find that the program of AA and a spiritual connection get me through the rough spots. What support do you have in your recovery?

chip

Hey Soxie-
Good stuff. You've come to the right place on SR...a place where like minded people gather.

Reality isn't perfect...but we are much better off facing it sober. I know about those days when it seems hard. There are many of us who stuggle and have struggled with addictions. Stick around, and you will read and interact with many of us. Together, we can learn from each other...and stay "on the wagon".
peace,
chip

soxie

My main support is my boyfriend...who is absolutely wonderful. When I met him, I was still drinking and smoking, and he actually did neither of those things. We dated for a few months...and the love I found with him was incredible. He showed me how to love myself, and to care enough to give them both up. Not by forcing me to, or by asking me to, but just by being there. He is so understanding about everything....and without his love...I wouldn't have found it inside myself to want to get better.

My mother is 10 years sober in AA. She is the other huge part of my support. When I was growing up...she struggled with alcohol, and got sober when I was a teenager. I attended many AA meetings with her...and learned a lot from watching the downward spiral she had been on. But we all have to make our own mistakes....and when I was ready to give up what I was doing...she was there for me every step of the way.

Phinneas

Fantastic, Soxie. Sounds like you have some good experience and good support. Now you can add SR to your arsenal of tools.

Welcome aboard!

lulu70

Hey there, Soxie--Glad you are here!!! Keep posting!

Steve58

Hi Soxie,

My wonderful wife provides a lot of support and incentive to me, I am so glad you have that. She never nags, she is just happier when I dont drink, and I know that, and want to please her

Reality is not that bad, and usually better to face head on than hide from. I found when you hide, it can just be more stuff to deal with when it does find you.

Take Care!

S

REZ

Congratulations on what you've done so far. I have a supportive family as well, but I also go to AA/NA. There's no way I could stay sober/clean on a long-term basis without the support of people in those meetings, my higher power and the 12 steps. Life is hard, and there always seems to be an excuse to drink/use.