naturelover

I apologize if I upset you, earlybird. I just didn't want the OP to think that tapering is impossible. I read this:
and took your statement at face value: that only 3% make it without AA; not as a statistic that only 3% succeed at tapering off. I do not see that in your post. About tapering off, you said only:
If the OP has taken the first step to admit his problem, I didn't want him thinking, "Oh, well, I was able to taper off from 12 drinks a day to 2 drinks a day, and Earlybird said that if I can taper, I'm not an alcoholic... maybe I CAN drink like a normal person." That's all. I wanted him to know that it IS possible for an alcoholic to taper off before quitting completely. Tapering off and being an alcoholic are not mutually exclusive.
You ask of me:
I didn't go to detox because I was able to taper off and avoid any dangerous withdrawal symptoms. My approach to recovery is simply different than yours. Both are working for us individually. I feel confident in my approach, my toolbox, and my resolution. I get support from those who "get it" from SR. I don't feel I need AA, but I certainly do respect that MANY people find that approach to be the solution and I wouldn't NEVER discourage anyone from trying that path of recovery. As I did, I would encourage everyone to at least TRY it. Try ANYTHING that might work!! I have found what I know will work for me. It's in harmony with my spiritualism (neo-paganism), I'm comfortable in my knowledge that I have my own Goddess strength inside, and it harmonizes with my natural family living philosphy. I am becoming a new, better person every day... that is the purpose of any type of recovery... change for the better. Questioning others' approaches to recovery does not seem very conducive to success, but I've answered your questions equitably. Again, I apologize if I have done something to offend you... I was just making sure that the OP knew that tapering off is not "impossible", just perhaps improbable. I didn't mean to split hairs, honestly. Again, I'm sorry.

OVERIT

(((((((((Faithful))))))))))

I want to apologize for my rambling post(s) last night. I just really did want you to know how serious withdrawal can be. And however YOU choose to do it, I wish you the very best.

xoxoxoxo

Ang

earlybird

My point was, if you are able to tapper off or 'cut down' and maintain that for the rest of your life, and you're drinking doesnt absorb your entire life by making SURE you only have the two drinks or making sure you only have beer instead of liquor or wondering if anyone questions your drinking, then you arent an alcoholic. ALcoholics cannot be alcoholics, and then cure it....and then drink normally as others do. THATS impossible. Many people 'cutdown' and stay that way for months,...maybe even years,....but they all tend to go back even harder and with more consequences. Being in the middle of that tappered off period,...Im sure they all think, "Hey this is working,....I can control this after all" But being two weeks sober and saying that your "get no help" and Tapper it off approach works is a little too soon dont you think?

naturelover

I think there is a misunderstanding here. The OP was posting about withdrawal symptoms, not about long-term recovery. He took time to taper off to 2 drinks a day to ease withdrawal symptoms. From what his post said, I believe he's ready to take the step to put the bottle down completely and is worried about the detox process. It's wasn't about being able to drink moderately or not. It wasn't about long-term recovery. And for the record, during the tapering off period, I was working toward the goal of getting down to zero alcohol... not once did I debate about whether I could "control it" or not, nor do I today.
What insight you have!! My approach ISN'T working!!! Why have I been misleading myself these last 3 weeks or so... I have to do it your way or I'm going to fail. If only I had gone cold-turkey and suffered all the dangerous withdrawal in an expensive detox center, then I would KNOW my recovery would be successful! I'll just go get drunk now, why not? I mean, you are so RIGHT!! Only YOUR way works and I can't bring myself to do that, so why am I deluding myself into thinking I can actually live life sober? There IS ONLY ONE WAY to sobriety!! Your way!

NOT!!!

Please don't question my path of recovery, my efforts, or the amount of time I've invested into my sobriety again. I have not questioned yours. Please show the same respect. It is NOT beneficial to anyone. Each person will GET sober, STAY sober and gauge their success in different ways. Just because it's different doesn't mean it's any less successful, whether that be 3 days, 3 weeks or 3 decades. I don't know why I'm wasting my breath here... I don't have anything to prove to you. And hijacking this thread is not good. If you have anything else to say to me, PM me.

To the OP - I think it's great that you've tapered off and you are ready to quit completely. Please don't let this public discourse between earlybird and myself deter you in your journey. Blessing to you.

earlybird

Ask any medical doctor. Go ahead. Ask them if its even a little bit wise to NOT seek help. To continue to drink and taper off. How can someone who cant seem to control their drinking like normal drinkers do, think that they can control their drinking in order to solve their drinking problem,...whether its to completely quit or not? You couldnt control it then,...so what makes you think you can now? And by the way,.....its not 'suffering dangerous withdrawal' if its in a detox center. Thats what they are their for. You quit drinking cold turkey, yes, but they also monitor your detox process through close observation and medication. Are you telling me that it sounds just as safe to try and continue to drink, try and ween off of it by yourself, and then, attend NO support group whatsoever??? Where do you learn to live a different life?? Its NOT about just the booze. Its about learning to live in a whole new way than you used to. If the booze doesnt getcha, the lifestyle will. You have to rid yourself of all using friends. Change the places you hung out. Change everything about your life. How can you learn to do that by refusing to get help from professionals who do this for a living? What makes you think you know better? Its foolish to gamble with your life like that. You will lose, like, 97 % of the time. And I think you know Im right. Which is why you are getting so defensive. You just wont admit it. People who are trying to do this on their own, have to remember,...their best thinking GOT them where they are. And maybe its time to turn it over.

Sugasnaps

Bottom Line...

NatureLover your recovery path is working for you for today. Period.

Earlybird your recovery path is working for you for today. Period.

We all have to learn and grow on our own. I think you both are good folks who are passionate about your recoveries... that's such a good thing.

Kudos to both of you in your successes!

shockozulu

I work a different path than both of you. Every body's path is different. That is why we share our questions and experiences at SR.

naturelover

Exactly!!!! This is what I've been saying all along!

Ditto what I said above.

Recovery is so personal that it has to be custom-made for every individual.

Anna

I'm closing this thread as it seems that people are getting into a heated argument about whose recovery is better.