hopealwayz

Hi friends,
(((SR A-Z)))

Does anyone have any helpful tips on what to look for in a sponsor?

Thanks,
Hope

PS- I have been pretty busy the last few days. I will be back in a few days to share my meeting experience.

I am putting this first in my life. I will lose anything I put before my recovery.

Little Missy

Can't wait to hear about your meetings!!

Don't remember what recovery program you are doing.
IMO, it is best for a woman to have a woman sponsor. Someone with some sobriety behind them. Someone who has worked the steps. Someone that has what you want. When you listen to them share, you will know!!
May I also suggest, praying for your HP's guidance in this matter!! The answers will come!!

Hugs,
Missy

aasharon90

Hi Hope. Glad ur here. I'm Sharon and I'm an Alcoholic.

Sponsors. I can only share my own experience. I was told to ask at least 3 people to be my Sponsor before I left treatment. It was a requirement. Hmmmm....I was scared to ask anyone because I didn't like approaching strangers. While in Rehab for 28 days we had drivers to come pick up a few patiants at a time and take them out of the hospital to an outside AA meeting. I remember going with a lady, name Norma to several meetings by myself. I did finally ask her if she would be my sponsor. I'm one of those people that after going thru childhood physical abuse by my mom, swore that after I left home that NO one would ever tell me what to do again. I still today have problems with that. Anyway....Norma was there to listen to me and used "BY SUGGESTIONS ONLY" to guide me. No one really likes being TOLD what to do, so I took her suggestions. I knew I wanted what she had because she had more sobriety than I. She went to meetings and shared and most of all did service work. Her love to bake inspired me to do the same. It was a way of getting out of myself and go out and help others. In baking things for my meetings, this allowed me to stop to recieve compliments which i dont do very well with. It stopped me long enough to stay and wait for my platter and chat with people. Im one of those to hide in the back of the meetings then run out as quickly as I can before anyone approaches me. Even tho I have moved away from Baton Rouge to Houston, Norma will always be my Sponsor as I have not replaced her. After going to meeting after meeting and absorbing much, the messages have been imbedded in my mind. I can never forget the kindness and guidance of my sponsor who helped me from the beginning to stay sober. She showed me that the Spirit of AA lives in all of us if we truely desire it.

Thank you for letting me share.

Cathy31

Hope
GREAT move! As everyone else said..just look for someone who has what you want...I also found it helpful to go to the chair of the meeting/one of the oldtimers saying I was looking for a sponsor and did they know anyone they could suggest? Also say it out loud in the meeting. It's important to ask even though most of it are scared the people we ask might say no!
Your HP will lead you in this.
Well done, Hope!
Cathy31
x

Chy

Hope this helps
http://alcohol411.info/What%20To%20L...%20Sponsor.htm

Jupiter2

Hi Hope,

Look for someone you identify with and just ask. I have learned that sponsorship is not a permanent thing. It is ok to switch sponsors if it does not work out. Don't be discouraged if your first sponsor is not working for you and don't let the fear if it not working prevent you from getting a sponsor in the first place. Just give yourself the right to get another one if the first one doesn't work out.

Jup.

Linda C.

HI Hope.. People all hear different things and offer lots of suggestions.. There are no rules about sponsors. There is a lot of information online and off about it however.. But I can only share my own thoughts and experience.

I was told in rehab to get a sponsor. Even if it be a temporary one at first. But I needed one to get going on the steps. I was told to pick someone who has worked all of the steps. Shows up at meetings, walks the walk and seems to have the benefits that sobriety and the program have to offer.. I wanted a sponsor who seemed to be living a life that the promises in the book offer.

A sponsor is someone who guides us through the steps and is available for us when we need to talk. Someone who carrys the message to us and shares their experience strength and hope. They are not our best friend, a banker, a hotel, a taxi, a therapist, etc..

We don't have to "relate" to them on a personal level. Its sobriety that is the issue. If I would have gotten a sponsor I "wanted it" would have been someone who would have always patted my head and told me I was ok.. Instead I got a sponsor I "needed"... One that kicked my butt and taught me about honesty, real honesty. One that called me on my bull and didn't tolerate much whining. Well - that is what worked for me. It may not work for you.

My sponsor has passed over many years ago now.. One of the best gifts I have given is continued sobriety for 25 years now.

The bottom line - is get one.. ( smile ).. As was said, if it doesn't work out you can ask someone else..

Linda C.