hopealwayz

I'm struggling with not having interest in anything. I just feel "Blah" and can't get motivated to get up to get anything accomplished. Is this the depleted dopamine levels?

I have missed many classes. I've just been in the bed sleeping. I can't go on like that though. I need to get up and get some exercise. I'm sure that would help but I have to push myself to do that.

Paulie

My sponsor just said to me yesterday when you feel like that imagine you are under a rock trying to crawl your way out. You really dont want the rock to squish you so you have to slowly crawl out, it is a process.

Some days all I can do is the next right thing, one after the other. Getting out of bed, the next right thing would be taking a shower, or whatever you get the point. Dont think big, stay small.....just the next right thing. Dont let that rock squish you.

hopealwayz

I have lost interest in pretty much everything-- I feel so empty. I still have that part of my mind that wants to believe that this will pass but I am blinded by the vulnerability that this lack of interest puts me into. I am just in a bad place at the moment. I did the next right thing today and I actually made it to class.

I want to feel something...anything but I still feel so numb. It has been 5 days free but I am still unable to feel. This is scaring me. I have that monster trying to take advantage of this situation and pull my arm into using but I'm not listening to that stuff.

I really hope that it is true what they say = ' this too shall pass' .

hopealwayz

This is the lie that addiction is throwing at me today; It is telling me that cocaine would help make me feel more normal from the damage that meth caused to me. Rationally, I can see the lie for what it is because cocaine would only farther deepen the depression and cloud my mind but I am just getting through the thoughts of my enemy today.

Anna

Hope, just try to be patient. It's still early to be expecting a big change. When I stopped drinking I wasn't even sure which way to begin moving. I spent awhile just getting my bearings and trying to deal with so many emotions. Just hang on and keep moving forward and things will fall into place.

hopealwayz

Thanks Paulie and Anna.
I'm being extra gentle with myself now.
That is better than to keep pushing myself
way beyond what I should be now.
I will feel normal again. I just have to learn how
to be patient.

Paulie

You are aware of your addiction and how it talks to you, that is agreat.

Keep up the great work, just keep doing the next right thing, no matter how big or small.