Htown281

I got out of treatment on the 27th and I haven't used drugs since then. Its hard to be a Senior in high school and pretty much the only person at school who doesn't use drugs. I know I can't use and that I am powerless over alcohol and drugs but I still struggle almost everyday with feeling like I need to use drugs. Is this normal? I know I can't ever use drugs or drink normally because if I just have one beer or take one hit I'll end up drinking and hitting the bowl until the next morning. Its extremely overwhelming that I am 18 years old and going to have to fight this diesease for the rest of my life. I've had the car accidents, the stealing, the paranoia, failed every class and almost got kicked out of my house. I know bad things happen when I get high so I don't understand the craving to use. Someone who is allergic to peanut butter wouldn't feel like dipping the spoon into the jar and eating it, yet I am allergic to alcohol and drugs and I still sometimes feel like using. It trully is baffling, cunning and powerful. I just need some support and some help to get me through this first few months. Thanks

garsh

Welcome, and be proud of yourself that you came here. I can't answer any of your questions with authority, but I can tell you that a life without getting high is a life worth living. I'll be rooting for you!

CarolD

Hi....You might find answers in our forum Drug Addiction.

And....check out

http://www.soberteensonline.com/foru...read.php?t=735

Welcone!

Sugasnaps

Welcome Htown!

Hang in there

Suga

hector

[[[******(((Htown)))}}}]]]. Lotsa big hugs.

I'll start at the beginning of your share, and when I get to the end, I'll stop. I'll focus on booze because I'm an alcoholic, not because your drugging is to be taken lightly. I'll share from what I know.

I highly doubt you're pretty much the only person in the school who doesn't use. Possible, but not likely. Maybe you could ask a teacher you trust.

Most people, me included, had cravings for a long time after stopping. That's normal, in my opinion. But everyone's different.

You have an edge. You know what you know.

Yes, you're right, an alcoholic has to stop drinking for the rest of his life. What I don't read in your sharing is one-day-at-a-time thinking. You don't have to stop for the rest of your life. You only have to stop for today. All I'm trying to do is go to bed tonight sober. Tomorrow, if I wake up, I'll work at staying sober tomorrow. I can't have tomorrow's dinner today, wouldn't be useful, and I can't have tomorrow's sobriety today either. I'm 50, you're 18, you're planning your whole long life, I'm planning my next 24 hours. A camel can go 24 hours without a drink. So can you. You might get hit by a bus or killed in a drive-by, so why plan a sober summer now? Today is the only day there is. You're not guaranteed tomorrow.

Your next sentences indicate you paid a pretty high price to get here. You didn't surrender easily. Don't pay any more dues. You've hurt enough.

People who are allergic to peanut butter still crave peanut butter. Diabetics still crave sweets. People with high blood pressure still crave salt. You aren't unique. Neither am I. When I see a row of liquor bottles in a bar, unwelcome thoughts sometimes still appear. I simply say, "For others, maybe OK. For me, POISON!"

Parting thought: Find the AA slogans. Write them out. Refer to them often.
I've been sober over 17 years. Remember, I'm pulling for you. We're all in this together.

Ngokpa

Early days are tough, but things get better. Yeah, you just do it one day at a time, but if you get around to working some kind of program you get fewer bad days until you're pretty much like anybody.

I can't help but feel you're lucky. I paid a lot of dues for years, and even though I've been sober a long time, it would be great to be coming out of high school. 15 years of drinking and using around a lot of other problems really take it out of you, and you don't recover as well as you would if you did earlier.