hopealwayz

I am not going to use tonight but I just wanted to get this out in the open. My addiction is whispering to me tonight. Thoughts are popping into my head making it look good when in reality, I know that using only brings pain .

I wish these thoughts would stop.. I'm going to study now and pray that the thoughts will get quiet.

I will NOT act on them tonight.

Too much going on in my life to ruin it with drinking / drugs.

Justme57

I am so sorry you are having such a struggle tonite Hope, my sponser told me , when I was having drinking thoughts , to play the tape right thru, from opening the first can, to the shame and remorse I would feel the next day . Dont know if that helps at all, but it helped me at the time . can you get to a meeting?

Anyway my thoughts are with you Hope
hang in there

HUGX
lee

ASH

Thats good thinking Cheryl,
you do have positive things going on for you right now because of the work you have done on yourself,
hit the books and stay busy!

daddysgirl29

Ohhh, baby!! Don't listen to those whispers! Bad whispers, BAD!! Say that to them. Justme is right - can you get to a meeting? If not, stay on here for awhile and keep posting until you get through it. Think of where you were - you don't wanna go back there, do ya? Think of the "cons" of using - your life has been so beautiful when you're clean - 'member? The cons will remind you of how sad you were afterwards. The instant gratification will only last so long - you've come too far to let the horrible after-effects lead you back into the basement.

I'm here for you, Cheryl!! PM me if you need to, but definitely keep posting. Everyone on here loves you and is pulling for you!!

Much love and big hugs,

Luckyv2

((((((Cheryl)))))))

What has been helping me is to talk out loud back to my addiction and disease and telling it that it is nothing but a lier and I am NOT going to listen to it anymore. I have been confronting it like that and it seems to help me. I am sending lots of prayers and good thoughts your way.

Love Vic

na4today

Stay strong Cheryl. It will pass. I hate those feelings but I know it will go away faster than the guilt I will have if I give in and use. You're doing great!

hopealwayz

I definitely don't wanna go back to that place where I was 34 days ago. That was just horrible. I am finally getting to enjoy freedom and a new life now. Using will only set me back and I will have to go through the pain and horrible detox plus depression for a long time after that.

I don't want to go back there. No, no , no . I am playing the tape thru to the end. That is not something that I am going to sign up for , no way..

roadie58

Thanks for telling on your disease. Be strong- you know what to do. Pray, read, help another who is suffering. Drink water, eat chocolate, take walk, ANYTHING but use!

Do you have local phone numbers for friends you can call?

Dan

64 minutes have passed since you posted this thread.
Just for today, you don't have to use.

hopealwayz

Yup, still hanging on.
Like a trooper.

hopealwayz

3 1/2 hours to go until I will be through another clean and sober day.

roadie58

way to go. one MINUTE at a time if you have to.

I'm praying for you right now.

hopealwayz

Thanks for the prayer.

hopealwayz

I can hear that voice of addiction in my head now just screaming in terror. I think it knows that I am not gonna give it what it wants and I am just gonna starve it.. I'm fighting the lies that it is telling me and exposing them for just what they are: LIES. I can almost feel that addicted part in my head screaming for dear life because it knows that I am putting up a fight against it and I will be stronger after I make it through.

Sugasnaps

Hopealwayz... think about your nickname you have here. You have hope baby. Hope for a better future. Hope for a time when you no longer have to feel what you are feeling right now. You can do it and that time will come. It is almost like... by using alcohol in the past I numbed out and didn't FEEL things... so I owe a ton of FEEL to myself and this is my bodies way of catching up with itself so I can get back into balance. You can do it... you have been an inspiration to me and have helped me when I think of caving in to my own feelings cuz I have gotten on here and have read the posts here. Yours have helped me get that little bit of strength I needed at that moment. So don't let you get you... YOU can do it.

Hang on to Hopealwayz,

Suga

Time4Change

Atta girl! Fight, fight, fight those damned cravings of addiction. You're doing great and you've got quite a bit of sobriety time now. It's pissed off at you, cuz you're winning! Keep it up, Hope! Lots of prayers going out to you tonight!

requiredfield

Doing ALL the right things....

Remember when..
Think it through...

Pray, pray, pray.....post, post, post.

Proud of ya!

hopealwayz

Decided to make a new thread in just a second about my evening.