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what is a dry drunk????

Old 11-13-2005, 10:56 AM
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what is a dry drunk????

I have heard the term "dry drunk" what does that mean. How long is a person sober before they are not a dry drunk??? Thanks Mary
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Old 11-13-2005, 11:07 AM
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Originally Posted by maramax
I have heard the term "dry drunk" what does that mean. How long is a person sober before they are not a dry drunk??? Thanks Mary
A dry drunk is someone who stops drinking and thats it. Doesnt work on themselves. Doesnt work on bettering their lives. Doesnt do the next right thing. Its someone who simply stops drinking but continues being the same selfish, irresponsible, self-centered, A-hole they were while drinking, and thus, is never really happy which 99% of the time, goes back to drinking almost immediately. Work the steps of whatever program you are in and you wont be a dry drunk. You will be sober.
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Old 11-13-2005, 01:12 PM
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Its also a deeply entranced myth that is based only on anacdotale evidence.

It could mean many things, normally means someone is distressed, selfish, "mad", or crazy.

Luckily, in my world it does not exist - but others, I think less fortunates, swear by it.
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Old 11-13-2005, 02:13 PM
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Please remember that anything expressed by me reflects my own opinion at this time and does not speak for AA as a whole.

A “Dry Drunk” can be a person who will claim to be a member of AA and who does nothing else but show up and pay it lip service. It can be a person who does just enough to make the pain go away and become comfortably "miserable." Through personal experience it was when I started putting other things before my program to where I became separated from the “sunlight of the spirit” as it is described in the Big Book. Let me emphatically tell you that anyway you look at it, it’s not a place that I want to go again, because I might not survive it the next time. (The only thing I didn't do was drink, but all my indexes of maladjustment were back in force.)

It can happen at anytime in sobriety. When it hit me I was 13 years sober. The best defense against it is to work the steps and make sure that when you have reached the last three, the maintenance steps, you DO continue to improve your conscience contact with God on a daily basis. (A good thing to do is Daily Prayer and Meditation. Real improvement comes from MORE prayer and MORE meditation... and working with others.)

Just a thought.
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Old 11-13-2005, 03:26 PM
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Originally Posted by Five
Its also a deeply entranced myth that is based only on anacdotale evidence.

It could mean many things, normally means someone is distressed, selfish, "mad", or crazy.

Luckily, in my world it does not exist - but others, I think less fortunates, swear by it.

she asked what it meant,.....not how many of us believed in it. If someone stays sober and goes to AA JUST to get signitures to please the court system,....then people have given that the label of dry drunk. You cannot say that doesnt exist. Its not even a question of whether it does or not. Thats the name they decided to give someone acting that way.
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Old 11-14-2005, 04:39 AM
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Originally Posted by earlybird
she asked what it meant,.....not how many of us believed in it. If someone stays sober and goes to AA JUST to get signitures to please the court system,....then people have given that the label of dry drunk. You cannot say that doesnt exist. Its not even a question of whether it does or not. Thats the name they decided to give someone acting that way.
A label that thankfullly I dont have to apply to anyone.

If you like seeing individuals in these terms then good luck to you.
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Old 11-14-2005, 04:41 AM
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"someone who simply stops drinking but continues being the same selfish, irresponsible, self-centered, A-hole they were while drinking"

And I think to myself...what a wonderful worllllllddddd....
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Old 11-14-2005, 04:52 AM
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Originally Posted by earlybird
she asked what it meant,.....not how many of us believed in it. If someone stays sober and goes to AA JUST to get signitures to please the court system,....then people have given that the label of dry drunk. You cannot say that doesnt exist. Its not even a question of whether it does or not. Thats the name they decided to give someone acting that way.
Maybe it might be worth having a look at your court system, before you start picking on people you dont know anything about. Maybe its the court who should not send you these awful, disgusting, dry drunks.
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Old 11-14-2005, 05:07 AM
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Originally Posted by Five
Luckily, in my world it does not exist - but others, I think less fortunates, swear by it.
Dry drunks, less fortunates? Seems like we all are judging, don't it?

Don
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Old 11-14-2005, 05:11 AM
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Good point, Don!

Dry drunk is just a drunk who is dry, not drinking - no spiritual progress, no helping or supporting of others, no kindness, same old resentments, self doubt, selfishness, self loathing, loathing of others.

If the cap fits...

And it certainly DOES exist!
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Old 11-14-2005, 05:13 AM
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Originally Posted by BigD
Dry drunks, less fortunates? Seems like we all are judging, don't it?

Don
Your right Don, seems like we are. Thing is, I can't remember the last time I judged someone like this:

" being the same selfish, irresponsible, self-centered, A-hole they were while drinking"

Less fortunate is as about "as demeaning" as I'll get.

Also, I would like to say that judgementalisim is a perfectly natural human facalcy that cannot be removed even if you end up Saint.
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Old 11-14-2005, 05:19 AM
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But your right I shouldnt judge - accepted.

But I don't like all encompasing, extreme, and rigid ideas about people. Its a killer...
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Old 11-14-2005, 05:22 AM
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Carol, check this out:

Each man sees only the evidence that confirms his existing beliefs.
A.T Beck.

You see a dry drunk, I dont.

Peace.
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Old 11-14-2005, 05:51 AM
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Progress... Not perfection.

Peace back and to all.

Love, Don
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Old 11-14-2005, 05:57 AM
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Nice 1 Big D.

All of us trying our best me thinks...
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Old 11-14-2005, 08:42 AM
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Red face

What do you get when you sober up a horse thief?
A sober horse thief.

Drinking and using are but symtoms of the decease. Getting help with the THINKING problem that makes us do the things we do, is something else entirely.

Cheers,
~GB
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Old 11-16-2005, 05:21 PM
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Originally Posted by Five
Maybe it might be worth having a look at your court system, before you start picking on people you dont know anything about. Maybe its the court who should not send you these awful, disgusting, dry drunks.

Holy crap,.......look,...it isnt MY definition. This is the definition I got when I asked that very question. Jeez,.....I wasnt calling anyone anything. I was giving an example of a person some people may label "dry drunk". Calm your cattle. Easy does it, remember??
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Old 11-16-2005, 06:14 PM
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I think it means being sober, but miserable still.
IMHO
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Old 11-16-2005, 06:19 PM
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To me a "DRY DRUNK" is someone who has behaviors like a drunk but without being drunk, like cursing, swearing, quitting job, leaving home and gone for days but doesnt drink so they think their behavior doesnt matter.
Keep reading and educating yourself... this is a lifelong process.... I am still learning.

Divorced from Alcoholic for 20 years now, still trying to figure out what's up!
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Old 11-17-2005, 01:02 AM
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Originally Posted by earlybird
Holy crap,.......look,...it isnt MY definition. This is the definition I got when I asked that very question. Jeez,.....I wasnt calling anyone anything. I was giving an example of a person some people may label "dry drunk". Calm your cattle. Easy does it, remember??
Lol: calm your cattle. I have never heard that one.

Sorry earlybird, I have got a lot of sensitivities around that word and its meaning.

My cattle is calmed
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