na4today

Wow Hope, I think your post is far from pathetic. Sounds like several of us have been ruled by another. I let my ex drive me to attempting suicide. I couldn't stand the things he was doing to get at me, and that made everything in my life bad. It was to a point that I would rather leave my baby girl and die so he couldn't hurt me. That is pathetic!!
I'm glad you posted with such honesty, I'm glad you are back here, and I'm glad you have today. We are here for you!

((((HUGS)))) kathy

quercusalba

No, Hope, not pathetic at all. You're supposed to reach out when you're struggling... that's one of the things that can make the struggle a little easier.

thinking of you,
anne

luluabel

(((Hope))) I love that you can reach out sweetheart ,I dont think your pathetic atall, I cant really give any better advice than you've already got here but I can say with honesty I have walked in your shoes .............
10 years later I realise he was'nt worth the time !the trouble !,the stress !,I thought I could'nt live without him turns out I really could,nt live with him ..............
I know how much you are hurting sweetie but it DOES pass I promise you that please dont get to my age and ask your self WHY.............................. did you waste so much of your life on someone who really did not deserve you ....................
As we say in my little part of the world CHIN UP CHUCK...............
thinking of you loads love Lulu xxxxxx

lulu70

(((((((((Hope)))))))))) Where did you go? Please come back soon and let us know how you are doing. We are here for you, honey!!!!

Love and hugs--

Time2Surrender

Hang in there Hope.Trust me.I have been in your shoes.Nobody is giving up on you.You are now part of the SoberRecovery Family and always will be.

wantneeda

(((Hope))))

jcw1964

I havnt seen anythign pathetic. At least nothing that we all havnt struggled with. We are all controlled by something. Some of us it is alcohol, drugs, sex, codependance, etc. You are not alone. Keep coming back and we can help each other.
Jeff

wingsfreed

((((Hope)))) Hope to hear from you soon kiddo, no one judges, no one thinks your pathetic, you're human

Jupiter2

Hope,

Post and let us know how you are doing...

Daniel.

hopealwayz

Hi everyone. I'm here and sober ,just really tired. I'm weary of all this stuff happening in my head(which isn't where I need to be!) I just had $50 stolen from me...uhhhh. I'm broke as it is.

Maybe one day I can look back on what I wrote and say, "HEY, boy, have I changed!!"

LOL.

Heartfelt thanks coming to each of you who extended your hand and gave me a good A$$ kicking too.

I am back up again.

wantneeda

Thats the spirit Hope!!!!!
onward, upward, forward!!!
It's the only way to go

hugs & hugs Wendy

wingsfreed

Atta girl (((Hope)))

hopealwayz

I'm still shaky on day 2...literally, shaky. The physical cravings are pretty bad today though. My mind is obsessing on using. I try to think of other things, but those thoughts keep coming back.

I want to use right now, but I just that I don't have to just because I want to. This discomfort won't always last.

Help me hang in there today. I need lots of support right now.

wingsfreed

The first few days after drinking is rough, but it will pass and you'll get much stronger. I'm so proud of you (((Hope))), so happy you got back up fast, I know how hard it is to get going again, today I'll do whatever I have to do to not go back there, today I know I can't, nor want to, just like you Hope. Hang on tight, take it easy, take care of yourself.

Balance & Harmony http://www.riversongs.com/Flash/bal.html

Much love and understanding.....Denise

goffredo

Hi Hope

please don't give up, love yourself and in that way others will love you.

When you feel so desperate and thinking of doing coke/drinking, just pause for a minute, train your mind, stop the desperate thoughts coming in and think:

1. All the times you were drunk/on coke and how awful it was, especially the next day/days.

2. Think of how nice it is to be sober, of all the things you can do. You are powerful, intellingent, nothing is impossible to you.

3. Throw the coke away.

4. When you feel the temptation, go out, go for a walk in the park. Walk slowly, breathe slowly, feel the wind on your face, stop and look at the sky, at the trees and think: life is beautiful.

You can do it

Love

G

lulu70

(((((((((Hope))))))))))So glad to hear from you and see that you are doing okay. I know it is hard right now. Try to hang in there. We are here for you as always!!

Love and hugs--

QueenShenique

In God's Economy nothing is wasted--that's from the Big Book of AA--you are so not alone--few women get to be grown without at some point in their life knowing great pain due to a relationship. And its tried and true--Everything That Doesn't Kill Us Only Makes Us Stronger. Glad to hear you are beginning to realize that addiction includes drugs and alcohol. Sometimes we think just because it's legal it can't be bad. As you have found out--so not true. I describe myself as a two fisted alcoholic--I will always have dope in one hand and booze in the other. If I drink again, I know I will pick up the dope immediately. Today there is no shame in my game--because there is no game--and sometimes it still "makes me wanna holler--the way they do my life"--but, I talk about it in a meeting or to my sponsor. I have loved and lost in addictioin and in sobriety. The hurt is the same--but the solution is way different. In recovery I have support and a way to cope with the pain that doesn't create MORE problems. Keep trying and keep talking! Peace!

na4today

Hey Hope, its good to hear from you today!

mayra

Hope, be strong as everybody here tells you. All great advices !
My son, whose is fighting his crack addiction also does go and run, joggs or any kind of exercise to fight the urge to used it. I know for experience it helps to regain your sanity after a heart broken.
Love and tons of prayers

hopealwayz

I used again last night...but for no reason other than I just wanted to. But, it was not worth it because I feel like shite right now.

I stayed up all of last night and had a test today. So, in my reasoning, if I stopped at a certain point, I'd be ok to take my test. I ended up not getting any rest and by the time I dragged my A$$ to that test, my mind was mush and I could barely count much less work any problems. I am exhausted and I look like I have been beat up.

And my nose kept running like crazy in class and I freaked out at one point because when I went to wipe it, the kleenex was red, uhh...blood. Freaked me out at that point.

But the point is that I don't want to use anymore. It is just not worth it at all.