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Newcomer...having issues Hello all... Bottom line I was at the end of a SERIOUS 6 month cocaine binge, for which I subsiquently lost my job and am currently on State Disablity. (yeah, cuz they're some much fun to deal with.) Anyway, I've reached my 90th day off coke and I'm more miserable than I ever was at my worst. It seems like coke is everywhere, from tv to my friends and I've been dreaming about it every night. My boyfriend doesn't know b/c he has enough to stress about and I'm not really telling my friends because I don't want to stress them out either. The worst part is that I actually snorted 4 adderall when I went out tonight, unbeknownst to my support group, which believe it or not are take no prisoners drug bashers. I just want to know what my options are...I tried narcanon, but it's all crack heads and meth users (not that they'res anything wrong with that, but I feel I don't get what I need in the meetings and it just depresses me further. Maybe anyone know of a therapist who has a sliding payment scale in the Berkeley/Oakland area? I just don't know if I'll be able to get through this alone...as much as my friends try, it's just not helping. Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks, Jaimes |
Welcome to SR, jaimes!! Have you tried Narcotics Anonymous? You're right about not being able to do this alone and NA is a great place to find support, regardless of your drug of choice. Check the phone book for your local helpline. Plus it's totally free of charge. You've already paid your dues. Keep in touch and let us know how you're doing, OK? Love and hugs, Eddie :slaphappy |
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People,Places and Things Hi Jaimes....you can't run with the same people, go to the same places and be around the same things if you're serious about getting clean and sober. YOU have to change. Clean and sober friends, places where there's no temptations and for God's sake no adderall or anything else. Sounds to me like you need a rehab where you can learn how live a life without coke. Rehab, or if not rehab, NA or AA meetings, and lots of meetings, will teach you what you need to do to try to put your life back together. Being on disablity gives you tons of free time. Use it wisely. Not hanging out with stoners and drunks. AA has a saying that applies to addicts "an alcoholic/addict alone is in his worst company". Coke isn't everywhere, you need to go where it isn't. With people who think it's a soda and you need to avoid a substitute like adderall and especially meth. Booze is just as bad. Good luck and God bless. |
Here's the meeting schedule for Oakland and San Fran for Cocaine anomymous Tuesday 7:00:00 PM Oakland 'One Puff Too Tuff' Big Book Study 9502 International Blvd. (East 14th St.) Tuesday 7:00:00 PM San Pablo 'CooCoo After One Puff' San Pablo Alano Club 2426 Church Ln San Pablo, CA 94806 Thursday 7:00:00 PM Oakland 'One Puff Too Tuff' 9502 International Blvd. (East 14th St.) Sunday 10:15:00 AM San Francisco 'The Breakfast Club' (Men’s Meeting) Kaiser CDRP 1201 Fillmore (at Turk) Monday 7:30:00 PM San Francisco 'Inner Sunset Group' St. John Of God 1290 5th Ave (at Irving) CHIPS - 3rd Monday of month Tuesday 7:30:00 PM San Francisco 'Fresh Start' Kaiser CDRP, Rm 5 1201 Fillmore (at Turk) CHIPS - 2nd Tuesday of month Wednesday 7:30:00 PM San Francisco 'New Beginnings' Park Presidio United Methodist Church 7th Ave. (at Geary Blvd) CHIPS - last Wed. of month Newcomer CHIPS every week. Thursday 7:30:00 PM San Francisco 'Learning to Live' Kaiser CDRP, Rm 5 1201 Fillmore (at Turk) Friday 3:30:00 PM San Francisco 'One Day at a Time' Step Study Kaiser CDRP - Room # 1. 1201 Fillmore (at Turk) Saturday 7:30:00 PM San Francisco 'Courage to Change' Presbyterian Church 32 Ocean Ave (at mission) And this is the home page for N. California CA http://www.norcalca.com/ Hope this helps. |
A million years ago I used to do coke/crank. I quit but then I used a couple times at parties. Everytime was really bad. I felt so bad about myself and how I behave. I made a rule that as soon as I found out there was something at the party I ran, not walked, to the nearest exit. I haven't used since. About 12 years now. I don't know if this works for everyone but if I gave my self time to consider it then I was in trouble. Jenn |
Hi Jaimes and welcome! This is the point where you have to begin to learn to expand your circle of friends, if it means dropping the using friends like flys to maintaint your sobriety, then that's what you do. Have you checked out Cocain Anonymous? (CA) may want to give that a shot. Don't let the fact that your present relationships are still using be what keeps you on that pity pot. We have to force ourselves out of that routine, and it can be damn hard to do. Once you find a means of support that works for you, it will get better, just stick with it and know you doing the right thing, our pity pots can get damn high somedays. |
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