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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: London
Posts: 4
First timer
Hello Everyone
I've never been on a forum before but reading all the help and advise you all give im going to take the plunge.
Im 25 and the person i want to help is my ex-boyfriend, he has finally admitted to himself he is an alcoholic and is on his 9th day. This is not the first time he has admitted he has a problem; over Christmas his drinking came to a head when he ditched a volnteer event we were doing together to go out drinking and lied to me about it. He admitted he had a problem and said he would get help and i supported him. After 2 AA meetings and staying off drink for a month, as advised by his doctor, he wanted to try an limit his drinks to see if he could control it, this appeared to work for about 1 month i began to notice him spiralling out of control.
Just as i was begining to get worried again my stepdad was killed on his motorbike on his way to work, the first person i called was my boyfriend and he was only too willing to be a support and did numerous things to try and help me through the shock. However 4 days after the event i recieved a text from him stating he saw me only as a friend. Needless to say i was truely gutted and confused as he had been talking about marriage the same day. He tried to talk to me to try and explain but i could not cope with it while i was grieving for my stepdad and refused to talk till after the funeral
I did not hear from him again till a week ago when he knew the funeral was over and gave me a letter pouring out his heart stating the pressure of what had happened made him drink and send a text he did not mean or want to send, he wishes he had died than done what he did.
He is now back attending AA meetings and seeing a counsellor.
I truely love him and I truely believe he is sorry for what he did and that he really wants to gain control again.
I have agreed to see him as a friend to try and support him through this, but at the same time keeping myself at a distance so i can cope with the loss of my stepdad and look after my mum.
I love him with all my heart and don't want to be with anyone else but i don't know if i can ever truely put what he did behind me and trust him again.
I know things are still new and raw for me and him at the moment but please would anyone have any advice on where to go from here? Thank you for listening.
I've never been on a forum before but reading all the help and advise you all give im going to take the plunge.
Im 25 and the person i want to help is my ex-boyfriend, he has finally admitted to himself he is an alcoholic and is on his 9th day. This is not the first time he has admitted he has a problem; over Christmas his drinking came to a head when he ditched a volnteer event we were doing together to go out drinking and lied to me about it. He admitted he had a problem and said he would get help and i supported him. After 2 AA meetings and staying off drink for a month, as advised by his doctor, he wanted to try an limit his drinks to see if he could control it, this appeared to work for about 1 month i began to notice him spiralling out of control.
Just as i was begining to get worried again my stepdad was killed on his motorbike on his way to work, the first person i called was my boyfriend and he was only too willing to be a support and did numerous things to try and help me through the shock. However 4 days after the event i recieved a text from him stating he saw me only as a friend. Needless to say i was truely gutted and confused as he had been talking about marriage the same day. He tried to talk to me to try and explain but i could not cope with it while i was grieving for my stepdad and refused to talk till after the funeral
I did not hear from him again till a week ago when he knew the funeral was over and gave me a letter pouring out his heart stating the pressure of what had happened made him drink and send a text he did not mean or want to send, he wishes he had died than done what he did.
He is now back attending AA meetings and seeing a counsellor.
I truely love him and I truely believe he is sorry for what he did and that he really wants to gain control again.
I have agreed to see him as a friend to try and support him through this, but at the same time keeping myself at a distance so i can cope with the loss of my stepdad and look after my mum.
I love him with all my heart and don't want to be with anyone else but i don't know if i can ever truely put what he did behind me and trust him again.
I know things are still new and raw for me and him at the moment but please would anyone have any advice on where to go from here? Thank you for listening.
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