aekjpack

I read post almost daily but it has taken me until today to be able to tell you all that I relapsed on Feb 14, 2005. I took 5 hydrocodone in 5 hrs. I just couldnt deal with all the stress in my life. I almost separated from my husband of almost 9 yrs. I decided to stay in the marriage and we have gone back to marriage counseling. I really want my marriage to work. I dont want to be alone. I am also back in treatment. I still am having cravings. I really want to be clean and sober. I also went to a meeting on Wed.
Amy

jenni

Hang in there and don't beat yourself up. Sometimes the pain seems unbearable, beleive it or not it will pass. Just keep doing the next right thing and it does get easier. Just don't give up!

Stephanie

aekjpack,

Even the best of us fall sometimes. It is most important to just keep trudging along. You did the right thing by coming here and telling us. The feeling you have when you do is a crucial feeling to experience to staying sober. The humility and surrender are feelings that are so easy to forget when we put some time together but so crucial to the process of remaining teacheable. Keep sharing and thanks for being here.

Jupiter2

Hey aekjpack,

Sounds like you are getting back up, dusting yourself off and going at it again. Don't beat yourself up too much. Can't tell you how many times I had a day or two at most of sobriety and drank again for another three or four days over the last several years. Sounds like you are going back to meetings and doing the right thing by going to treatment. I think you are doing a lot here and you certainly had the courage to post about this. Hang in there.

Val-light

((((Amy))))

Roxann

I'm glad you are here Amy. You relasped on the 14th? Have you used since then? It sounds like you are doing great by going to meetings, and by posting. Keep it up, it isn't easy, but it's so worth it. It will get better and you'll be just fine.

aekjpack

I used just that one day. Thank you all for your support. I really apprediate it.

HPierce

((((amy)))) hang on amy!! i'll pray for you!

hopeful2day

Amy,
Congrats on making it back to recovery so quickly after your experiment. It took me two years of using to find my way back. All you did was reaffirm that you are where you belong. The hole in the soul does not go away unless we work the steps, and then contiue to do so, every day. At least, that has been my experience.

aekjpack

Just wanted to check in and let everyone know that I am doing much better. I have gone to a couple of meetings which was a big step for me. My husband and I have gone to marriage counseling twice now and things seem to be working out. We are still having some major issues with our daughter (she is almost 7). She has been making threats at school and is very angry. I am not sure what to do. I seem to be blaming myself because we pulled her out of a private Christian school in Jan. and put her in public school. We now pulled her from public school and are trying to get her back in the private school but the school might not let her back in. She has to take an academic test on Tuesday to see if she is where the other first graders are and if she isnt we will have to home school and she will repeat 1st grade next year at the private school. She will also start counseling. I just dont know how to cope with all this and try to get better myself. please help me.