New here--this is my story

Old 01-10-2005, 10:38 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Somewhere, USA
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New here--this is my story

Hi everyone,

I have been reading the messages for the past week and I have finally got up the courage to post and tell you about myself. I didn't start drinking until I was seventeen, which in my high school was actually kind of late. However, I did black out the first night and don't remember much. After that I continued to drink occassionally, but usually got drunk and would black out every time I did drink. I started binge drinking more frequently in college, about 2-3 nights/wk, some weeks more. After graduating from college my drinking continued. For the past 6 years I have been drinking at home, anywhere from 6-18 beers per day. I am married and have one child. I quit drinking when I was pregnant but slowly started back after breastfeeding. I am sick of feeling crappy and hungover all the time. I am sick of my house being a mess and not knowing where I stand financially because I don't take the time to figure out my bills. I feel out of control! I also hate feeling guilty every day after drinking and I feel like a bad mom. I have tried to quit probably 20 times in the past 8 years. So I finally quit 8 days ago and have been reading posts here. It has definitely helped. It's been ok so far, but I do think at times "maybe I can just drink occassionally". Then I realize I've tried this in the past and it didn't work. So anyway, I'm here and I am an alcoholic. I haven't been to an AA meeting yet. Haven't got up the courage yet for that. That's also something I've been wondering. . . What was your first AA meeting like? What do you do when you first walk in? Do they expect you to talk and introduce yourself? Any feedback would be very helpful! Thanks for reading this long post. Talk to you all soon.

Miss Lucy
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Old 01-10-2005, 10:50 PM
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Psalm 118:24
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Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203

It Felt Like I Was Home. No One Judged Me. Everyone Knew How I Felt. I've Been Sober For 5and A Half Years. I Stay In The Program Because, Someone Wast There For Me. There's A Better Way Of Life Out There. You Won't Find It In The Bottom Of A Glass.

Keep Coming Back\


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Old 01-10-2005, 11:00 PM
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Giving up control
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Location: Beckley, WV
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I remember my first meeting like it was yesterday. I walked in late because I couldn't find the church. I sat there all emotional crying because the stories were exactly like mine. I met really good people that night that I still keep in contact with. Keep in mind I am a really shy person....After the meeting a man name Joe came up and gave me a 24hr. a day medal medallion and told me to keep coming back.. Check it out for yourself. Oh yeah, you don't have to open your mouth at all if you don't want to. This program is anonymous. I promise you will not regret it!!! With Love, Susan
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Old 01-10-2005, 11:10 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Iola, Kansas
Posts: 9

Welcome to SR and congrats on your sobriety.... You may try calling the local group and talking to a Female and set up a time before a scheduled meeting to get a little aquainted then have her enter the room with you. Its what I did my first meeting and it seemed to work out okay. She may walk you through the preamble of the meeting and make you feel comfortable.

Again Welcome and may God Bless you

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Old 01-10-2005, 11:10 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Northern , CA.
Posts: 42
I am sick of my house being a mess and not knowing where I stand financially because I don't take the time to figure out my bills. I feel out of control!
Boy , oh Boy. Thats ME ! I stopped opening my mail so long ago. My daughter (23) helped me sort them out thank goodness before x-mas.
My middle daughter cleaned my house for x-mas. I wasn't drinking at the time, but struggling. And depressed.
I know you can do it.
The friends you make here will be there for you....
Isn't it amazing how we all came together at this time to support one another.
Coinsidence? I think not. : )
Keep coming back, no matter what..
Love, Cindy
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Old 01-11-2005, 12:42 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: West Hollywood, CA
Posts: 15
Hi Lucy. I am kind of where you are right now. I haven't been to an AA meeting yet but I really want and need to go. I am scared but at the same time almost excited because everyone is there for the same reason. I want to listen to people's stories. I imagine you will really relate to others there and find comfort and a lot of help. I am somewhat shy and seem to blush everytime I have to talk in public so I am kinda nervous on that level, but my goal is to attend a meeting for the first time in the next few weeks. I've also thought I could drink occasionally but that rarely happens, honestly. My one drink turns into two, which spurs my craving to get completely drunk out of my mind.

I think reading the posts here helps a lot. Just keep coming back and don't take long extended breaks like I have tended to do. Welcome, and we will make it :-)
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Old 01-11-2005, 12:42 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Out of Town
Posts: 20
God, Miss Lucy, I thought I was the only one!

I am in the same boat as you! I posted that I drank 12 + beers/ day and someone here told me they thought that was an awful lot for a woman. Yeah, it is! It is a lot for a man as well! It made me think I must be dying, maybe I should just give this all up. That may be true, but I really want my life back!

Maybe we can do this together, Miss Lucy?
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Old 01-11-2005, 01:31 AM
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one of many
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Ellisville, FL
Posts: 200
Hi Lucy,

I'm glad you found our community. I would like to extend a warm welcome to you and all the other newcomers. I'm a relative newcomer myself(92 days sober). My first NA meeting was pretty neat. I was nervous and almost talked myself out of going there, I'm glad I didn't. You will find a warm welcome of people who face the same struggles as yourself. People who are willing to listen to whatever you have to say. Every meeting it seems like I make some new friends. I wish you the best of luck You are on the right track.

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Old 01-11-2005, 01:52 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: gone
Posts: 35
Hi, Miss Lucy,

I'm new, too, and can relate to a lot of what you say--the guilt, the apprehension about going to a meeting. I've yet to go, but the more I read here, the more I think that's the thing to do. Until then, I am SO GLAD to have found that other people actually understand! I am glad you're here!
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Old 01-11-2005, 02:04 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Smyrna, Ga.
Posts: 21
Hi Miss Lucy!

I am six days sober now, and I went to my first meeting a few days ago. I was nervous pulling up, thought it would be akward, but everyone was very friendly and ready with smiles, handshakes, and hugs. Don't let your fears keep you away!
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