Weekenders, Marching Soberly through the weekend, 19-22 April 2024
 

Weekenders, Marching Soberly through the weekend, 19-22 April 2024





:welcome to the Weekenders



I promise myself I will not drink alcohol this weekend.



So easy to write...but what does it really mean?



Promise myself???



a declaration or assurance to me and us!



But it’s not just us in the mix!



It’s that Addictive Voice that yabber yabbers, trying to convince us to take the drink or drugs.



The addictive voice pretends to be our friend...it is our Nemesis.



Putting it in its rightful place, taking away its power, gives us an opportunity to march on soberly through the weekend....Whatever the weather.



If this is your first weekend sober, or many, come join us for support and chat...as we know the weekends can be a struggle sometimes.



We’re not just here to talk about the good stuff, if you’re struggling.....please shout out.

(We’re here all week too!) :)

The webinar sounds great, Least. I’m so happy that you’re doing better.

That’s funny, Sao. I actually read a lot own. I reading about a book a week. I haven’t missed book club in a while. But it’s okay to not go sometimes!

We met a the bar after bike club. I don’t mean to be negative. But I felt absolutely invisible. Everyone drinking and talking. Mostly guys. But I sort of just smiled and did my normal overthinking thing. Counted how many times ppl made eye contact with me. One guy was telling a long story. Looked at everyone at one point or another. But not me.

Anyway. It was a heck of an intense ride. I hope to sleep well tonight.

thank you Mags :)

D

I'm sorry you felt invisible Peke.

I think most of us have felt that way - in the great majority of times for me its not because I've done any thing wrong.
Maybe it was a bit too testosterone-y a meeting?

D

Hi Peke, :wave: could it be the guy is shy of females? , hope you sleep well.

Hi Dee :wave:

It’s fine, Dee. It’s just my usual routine.
I’m grateful to be home and sober. Thanks tho.

Mags, I’m sorry. When I posted my message, I sure didn’t see your (new/updated) weekenders post. Not sure how I even got shotgun?? I must have hit “send” when you had posted your thread….

Thank you for what you wrote, Mags.
Yes: putting the AV in its place is paramount in staying and maintaining sobriety.
“Promising myself” means not only that I’m not drinking, but that I’m tuning out the AV. That I won’t fall under its spell. That it won’t let it convince or coerce me to do something involving alcohol. I promise to tune the AV out!

Congratulations on shotgun Peke :c011: . The av gets weaker as your sober muscles get stronger, I found.

I'm in for another sober weekend!! :)

Good to see you least :wave:

Thanks Mags. I'm IN for another sober weekend.

In for weekend and pledging for today. Day 563.

I have been on the opposite side of this spectrum so I'm going to say maybe this. A LOT of people both men and women when they exercise are there to not only exercise but also to flirt. I learned to be very cautious how I talked to other women when I went running or cycling in a group. I have been married for 30 years this next October and did not want to give any impression I was shopping. That may be why some men may seem like they aren't paying you any mind. They are married or know you are and don't want to give the wrong impression.

Day 288 ODAAT

Too funny Sao, about the book on procrastination that you haven’t read yet. :lmao

You sound well Peke.
I agree with DD, it is a strange social/societal thing, but I can picture a man avoiding eye contact for reasons similar to what he discussed. Strangely, I’ve been there….avoiding eye contact with the very attractive woman in the room.
(shyness, trying to be considerate of partner(s) (on either side), maybe some ties to old school morality, oh…and also the “don’t look creepy” voice in my head :lmao:emb.

Loved the bus thing. Not a very Zen situation happening there.

Anyway… have a good day folks.

I'm in! Thanks, Mags.

When I quit, I made a promise to myself to work very very hard to stay sober. I only promised that I'd take it a day at a time, at the beginning. I promised that I would get through the urges and cravings, and that I'd go to bed sober TODAY. Later on, I was able to promise myself to never drink again, to never listen to the voice in my head telling me "one won't hurt."

That voice is trying to break through today. I'm about to have an extremely stressful day, and I got very little sleep last night. I will not bore you with details. There are things happening at my job that I have little control over, but that could affect me and everyone else here. There are other things that I CAN control, so I'll be concentrating on those things today, and trying to not lash out at a particular person who I'm quite angry with. This person constantly creates more work for me with his lack of planning, and we have a major event today that might fall apart, through no fault of mine. The parts of this event I control will be fine, but the rest of it might not. And I fully expect a panicked email or call from him later today when he realizes he dropped the ball on several things (I'm assuming he did, it's his MO). Times like these I want to just run away and let the chips fall where they may, but my conscience won't let me. One more year, at the most, and I'll be done with all of this. I keep telling myself that.

Thanks TC and DD. Didn’t really think of it that way. There was one other woman there though. She was with her husband (mine is always working and doesn’t cycle). So maybe that whys she was getting eye contact??
I need to stop dwelling on the negative and focus on the good things.
I want to be happy.
Slept for five plus hours last night!
Hi Robbie, Mags and sweet Least.
MLD- stay strong. Put that AV in its rightful place as Mags said. You are in control here.

Hopefully sober this weekend.

Not sober now. Struggling to get together enough to go to AA tonight. Drinking 3.5% beer, so not wasted or anything, but it's not ideal.

Thank you Mags! You always have the best things to say. I really do think you should be a writer! There are a lot of great English writers!
Grateful to be sober and going into another weekend sober.
Peke, sorry you felt invisible. I think Dee is right, maybe too much testosterone in the room.
Good luck fredomfries, we're all pulling for you.
Have a great day all and grateful for sobriety.
:grouphug:

✨ 𝓔𝓿𝓮𝓻𝔂 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓭𝔂 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝓪 𝔀𝓮𝓮𝓴𝓮𝓷𝓭 ✨

"𝓢𝓮𝓵𝓯-𝓼𝓾𝓰𝓰𝓮𝓼𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷 𝓶𝓪𝓴𝓮𝓼 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓶𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓸𝓯 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻𝓼𝓮𝓵𝓯." ~ 𝓦. 𝓒𝓵𝓮𝓶𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓢𝓽𝓸𝓷𝓮

Get to the meeting FF. I always hope the best for you :)

The only power the AV has over me is the power I give it. I have to stop fighting everything included the fight going on within me. I have to let go of alcohol and all the desires to drink again. I win the fight by not fighting. Surrender to win logic rings true with me.

Time to engage life for today :) sober :)