DriGuy

I know the context in which you use the word "stronger," and indeed, I certainly think of my sobriety as being more solid with every year, but I don't feel stronger in that I no longer have to fight to stay sober as I did that first month. There is no battle where I exert energy and strength.

One day, we don't need to be stronger, but we will still need to be vigilant, thoughtful, and smart. When our AV invites us to a grueling battle of wills, we just ignore the invitation, and leave the AV out on the battlefield talking to himself with nothing to do as we go about our day.

KTB5000

Thank you for sharing Scott. I also have felt tempted lately. Good to know I'm not alone. Best to you. ❤️

Dee74

'Stronger' is a little imprecise, I agree - but it cuts through better than than something like 'a fundamental and intrinsic surety'.
but yeah, it a paradox for sure
I win the battle by not fighting.

Bottomed

'a fundamental and intrinsic surety'.

I win the battle by not fighting.

That sounds like something on an official form! Why use plain English when the perplexing will do.

I am learning this. Don't fight, I can't win.
I don't argue with the AV, it's the part of me that is gunning for a drink, it already has an advantage in any argument. But no advantage in a straight up dismissal.

DriGuy

I just get caught up in the interesting paradoxes of recovery. Unfortunately, I'm not sure that a newbie can understand the wonderful insights that abound outside the fog of active alcoholism, and the strength, or willpower issue is one of the paradoxes I never saw until I got there. It hit me one day as, "Holy smoke! I've been barking up the wrong tree." I was in the right forest, but focused on the wrong tree. Well, at least I was in the right forest. All of us have to start there.

If this thread gets any headier, I may not be able to keep up.


Thank you. That's brings the discussion back down into the lower atmosophere.