Losing direction. (AA)
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
There is no mention of sponsorship in the book entitled Alcoholics Anonymous - many refer to it as the Big Book etc. The program is the first 164 pages with fluff/stories afterwards
Friends can help you navigate the steps as needed and will gladly answer your questions. I strongly suggest finding an old timer or someone who has several years of program sobriety to work with you on a 4th step.
It works if you work it - not if you find the best fit of a “sponsor”
Best of luck, friend
Friends can help you navigate the steps as needed and will gladly answer your questions. I strongly suggest finding an old timer or someone who has several years of program sobriety to work with you on a 4th step.
It works if you work it - not if you find the best fit of a “sponsor”
Best of luck, friend
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
There is no mention of sponsorship in the book entitled Alcoholics Anonymous - many refer to it as the Big Book etc. The program is the first 164 pages with fluff/stories afterwards
Friends can help you navigate the steps as needed and will gladly answer your questions. I strongly suggest finding an old timer or someone who has several years of program sobriety to work with you on a 4th step.
It works if you work it - not if you find the best fit of a “sponsor”
Best of luck, friend
Friends can help you navigate the steps as needed and will gladly answer your questions. I strongly suggest finding an old timer or someone who has several years of program sobriety to work with you on a 4th step.
It works if you work it - not if you find the best fit of a “sponsor”
Best of luck, friend
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2022
Posts: 118
Thanks everyone.
It has been very helpful reading through all of your replies and I agree that I have to take responsibility for my recovery and do what is best to achieve the goal of permanent abstinence.
I had a chat with my sponsor and told him that, for personal reasons, I was stepping back from being sponsored for now. He was absolutely understanding and supportive. My plan is to keep going to meerings and, in time, find a different sponsor to work the steps. I didn't want to throw away my involvement with AA over this issue and I feel like I've reached an outcome where I can progress within the program but on my own terms
Thanks again!
It has been very helpful reading through all of your replies and I agree that I have to take responsibility for my recovery and do what is best to achieve the goal of permanent abstinence.
I had a chat with my sponsor and told him that, for personal reasons, I was stepping back from being sponsored for now. He was absolutely understanding and supportive. My plan is to keep going to meerings and, in time, find a different sponsor to work the steps. I didn't want to throw away my involvement with AA over this issue and I feel like I've reached an outcome where I can progress within the program but on my own terms
Thanks again!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2018
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 269
Originally Posted by Toddy 
Hi everyone.
It's been ages since I've posted on here but I've been attending AA fairly consistently for about 6 months. I relapsed a month or so ago and i currently have 25 days of sobriety.
I have been pretty enthusiastic and convinced by AA and the 12 steps despite my initial scepticism. I used to think it was a load of rubbish but after going to a few meetings I started to understand the real life power in the steps.
My problem is I think i might have chosen the wrong sponsor. He is a great bloke but he is extremely full on, he is so unbelievably fluent in AA and kind of talks at me rather than to me. I dont feel like we have conversations, more like I spend an hour on the phone listening to him talk very deeply and passionately about the big book. He's just way to full on with it all.
This is leading me to feel like i dont want to continue with AA but I've tried pretty much every other approach and I just keep relapsing.
I would change sponsor because there is a different bloke in my home group who seems like he'd be a much better fit with my personality but I'd feel awful about dropping my current sponsor and I'm not sure I could face seeing him in meetings afterwards.
To be honest I wish I could just stop drinking and be done with it but I've tried that about a thousand times!!
It's been ages since I've posted on here but I've been attending AA fairly consistently for about 6 months. I relapsed a month or so ago and i currently have 25 days of sobriety.
I have been pretty enthusiastic and convinced by AA and the 12 steps despite my initial scepticism. I used to think it was a load of rubbish but after going to a few meetings I started to understand the real life power in the steps.
My problem is I think i might have chosen the wrong sponsor. He is a great bloke but he is extremely full on, he is so unbelievably fluent in AA and kind of talks at me rather than to me. I dont feel like we have conversations, more like I spend an hour on the phone listening to him talk very deeply and passionately about the big book. He's just way to full on with it all.
This is leading me to feel like i dont want to continue with AA but I've tried pretty much every other approach and I just keep relapsing.
I would change sponsor because there is a different bloke in my home group who seems like he'd be a much better fit with my personality but I'd feel awful about dropping my current sponsor and I'm not sure I could face seeing him in meetings afterwards.
To be honest I wish I could just stop drinking and be done with it but I've tried that about a thousand times!!
However, my rehab facility was 12-step based and we were encouraged to seek a new sponsor if we earnestly believed that it was necessary. Also, they emphasized the crucial importance of a sponsor with whom we felt comfortable.
In the abstract, being listened to and counseled seems like it would work better than simply being preached to. I think that would tent to apply to pretty much everything.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
Originally Posted by zoobadger
I attended AA meetings in early sobriety and never got a sponsor, so I might not be qualified to comment.
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