The point of it all
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Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
The point of it all
Having a hard day. Wondering the point of it all. Like what is my reason for working so hard? To be sober? At work? Being physically active? Eating healthy? I’m just sad today and feeling lonely.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,759
For me, the whole 'point' was becoming the best 'me' I could possibly be. 
. Drinking was standing in the way of my being all I could be, so to stop drinking was the only thing to do. I often wonder why am I here, and all that stuff, but I just try to do my part to make my little corner of the world a better place. 
Remember, if you are still early in recovery your feelings are all over the place and living sober feels like riding a scary roller coaster. Keep in mind that you will not feel like this always. Things will get better with time. Just don't drink at all, and keep putting one foot in front of the other, and you'll come to know peace.
If you're not already doing so, I suggest you start practicing gratitude every day. Each day find five things to be thankful for, and if you can express your gratitude to whomever, that's even better cause thanking people for being kind makes them feel good.. If everyone practiced gratitude, this world would be a nicer kinder place.
. Drinking was standing in the way of my being all I could be, so to stop drinking was the only thing to do. I often wonder why am I here, and all that stuff, but I just try to do my part to make my little corner of the world a better place. Remember, if you are still early in recovery your feelings are all over the place and living sober feels like riding a scary roller coaster. Keep in mind that you will not feel like this always. Things will get better with time. Just don't drink at all, and keep putting one foot in front of the other, and you'll come to know peace.
If you're not already doing so, I suggest you start practicing gratitude every day. Each day find five things to be thankful for, and if you can express your gratitude to whomever, that's even better cause thanking people for being kind makes them feel good.
. If everyone practiced gratitude, this world would be a nicer kinder place. 
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Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by least 
For me, the whole 'point' was becoming the best 'me' I could possibly be. . Drinking was standing in the way of my being all I could be, so to stop drinking was the only thing to do. I often wonder why am I here, and all that stuff, but I just try to do my part to make my little corner of the world a better place.
Remember, if you are still early in recovery your feelings are all over the place and living sober feels like riding a scary roller coaster. Keep in mind that you will not feel like this always. Things will get better with time. Just don't drink at all, and keep putting one foot in front of the other, and you'll come to know peace.
If you're not already doing so, I suggest you start practicing gratitude every day. Each day find five things to be thankful for, and if you can express your gratitude to whomever, that's even better cause thanking people for being kind makes them feel good.. If everyone practiced gratitude, this world would be a nicer kinder place.
. Drinking was standing in the way of my being all I could be, so to stop drinking was the only thing to do. I often wonder why am I here, and all that stuff, but I just try to do my part to make my little corner of the world a better place. Remember, if you are still early in recovery your feelings are all over the place and living sober feels like riding a scary roller coaster. Keep in mind that you will not feel like this always. Things will get better with time. Just don't drink at all, and keep putting one foot in front of the other, and you'll come to know peace.
If you're not already doing so, I suggest you start practicing gratitude every day. Each day find five things to be thankful for, and if you can express your gratitude to whomever, that's even better cause thanking people for being kind makes them feel good.
. If everyone practiced gratitude, this world would be a nicer kinder place. Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,369
Originally Posted by AJ143143
Having a hard day. Wondering the point of it all. Like what is my reason for working so hard? To be sober? At work? Being physically active? Eating healthy? I’m just sad today and feeling lonely.
Some days I do better than others but its not a bad 'point' to have
Hope you feel better tomorrow AJ
D
Yield beautiful changes
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: A home filled with love
Posts: 1,696
Originally Posted by AJ143143
Having a hard day. Wondering the point of it all. Like what is my reason for working so hard? To be sober? At work? Being physically active? Eating healthy? I’m just sad today and feeling lonely.
What if her diet wasn’t perfect? What if she sometimes felt overwhelmed and drank too much? Would she still hold value? Worth? Is there still “a point” to her existence?
When I ask myself these questions, my heart says, “Well , of course! She’s a good friend! She’s kind! She certainly has a purpose and a reason, even if she has struggles!”
I could always give the gift of worth to others based on their being, but I insisted that my worth be based on my effort.
In the past I’ve thought:
“When I’m desirable, I’ll have purpose.”
“When I marry, I’ll have purpose.”
”When I have children, I’ll have purpose.”
“When my career takes off and I succeed financially, I’ll have purpose.”
Silly. Fear-based. I didn’t realize that my purpose was born/built into my soul. I don’t need to chase it - I just need to rest in it.
I believe my purpose is to love God, love others, and love myself. Which is amazing fun! Love is a beautiful motivator -especially when compared to fear!
I don’t know “the point” of you, AJ, but I’m inclined to believe that you have a great one, even if you quit your job, sat very still, and ate nothing but chocolate cake for 6 weeks (this is not medical advice
.)I hope your illness passes quickly! Take care!
voices ca**y
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: St. Paul Minnesota
Posts: 4,352
The point of it all is to be the hero of your story. You are about to rescue yourself. You are about to understand just how amazing and capable you are. You will never be alone because you will always have you and you will feel lucky about that. Its not easy but you are already doing it.
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Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: NC
Posts: 5,148
Originally Posted by AJ143143
hi thank you for your reply. I’m not drinking. I do practice gratitude … today just brings up the pain of being divorced… single… no kids… I’m just going through it today. I’m also really sick so I couldn’t go to my friends xmas lunch. (I didn’t want to get anyone else sick)… I had to move a few days ago so I couldn’t decorate (didn’t have time ect)… my throat is on fire. I feel like I want to sleep for days.
The AV loves these thoughts. What's the point? Classic AV.
Hope you feel better soon.
Remember, this shall pass
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Western New York
Posts: 2,440
Life isn't always easy or fun, but drugs and alcohol give false joy and slowly destroy you.
Having just gone through 3 straight days of digging out of a snow storm, and still having been able to have a wonderful Christmas with my children and family, I can tell you it wouldn't have been possible if I had been drinking still.
The point of it for me is life is wonderful and making the most of every moment. It goes fast. I don't want to lose it to blackouts, stupid arguments and drunken injuries/misery
Having just gone through 3 straight days of digging out of a snow storm, and still having been able to have a wonderful Christmas with my children and family, I can tell you it wouldn't have been possible if I had been drinking still.
The point of it for me is life is wonderful and making the most of every moment. It goes fast. I don't want to lose it to blackouts, stupid arguments and drunken injuries/misery
Member
Join Date: Oct 2021
Posts: 12,403
AJ, big hug to you and I hope this day finds you in a better place. I totally understand the feeling of loneliness and for me sometimes practicing gratitude does not work, although I do do it every day. For me I just have to push through the day and know that the current feeling I am experiencing is temporary. Easier said than done I know. For me when I feel this way, then drink it makes it times worse. It was not the escape I was looking for or needed. Hang in there.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: west falls, ny
Posts: 601
Hi AJ,
. A lot of good points on this thread.
I feel that way too a lot of times.
I live by myself,
It is a lonely existence.
I'm 62, even at best,
Three quarters of my life is over.
Numbing myself has been the easy way out.
But drinking is just a whole negative, depressing experience.
It's been slowly robbing me of my health, money, self-respect, etc etc.
Trust me, I only have a couple weeks under my belt,
I'm here on shaky knees.
But I know and believe what the long time sober here folks say is true.
It gets sooo much better!
We need to hang in, no matter what.
. A lot of good points on this thread.
I feel that way too a lot of times.
I live by myself,
It is a lonely existence.
I'm 62, even at best,
Three quarters of my life is over.
Numbing myself has been the easy way out.
But drinking is just a whole negative, depressing experience.
It's been slowly robbing me of my health, money, self-respect, etc etc.
Trust me, I only have a couple weeks under my belt,
I'm here on shaky knees.
But I know and believe what the long time sober here folks say is true.
It gets sooo much better!
We need to hang in, no matter what.
Yield beautiful changes
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: A home filled with love
Posts: 1,696
Originally Posted by silentrun
The point of it all is to be the hero of your story. You are about to rescue yourself. You are about to understand just how amazing and capable you are. You will never be alone because you will always have you and you will feel lucky about that. Its not easy but you are already doing it.
Thanks, silentrun!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 2,426
I hope you are feeling better AJ. One of the biggest rewards of sobriety for me has been the ability to recognize feelings like sadness and loneliness coming on, and know for certain that those feelings will move on through and that they are temporary. That's not much comfort I'm sure when you are in the midst of feeling sad and lonely. In early sobriety my nag-headed head tried time and again to convince me that feelings were permanent, and so what's the point?, and I might as well drink right? I'll wager your head is trying that on for size too. Hang in there and don't fall for the lie my friend. Peace AJ.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: NSW - Australia
Posts: 14,536
That is one of the good bits, Surrendered.
Feelings of sadness and lonliness are temporary. Sobriety is one thing that helps make this so, even when we're sad and lonely.
Alcohol wrecks even sad and lonely.
Feelings of sadness and lonliness are temporary. Sobriety is one thing that helps make this so, even when we're sad and lonely.
Alcohol wrecks even sad and lonely.
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Oh me! Oh life! of the questions of these recurring,
Of the endless trains of the faithless, of cities fill’d with the foolish,
Of myself forever reproaching myself, (for who more foolish than I, and who more faithless?)
Of eyes that vainly crave the light, of the objects mean, of the struggle ever renew’d,
Of the poor results of all, of the plodding and sordid crowds I see around me
Of the empty and useless years of the rest, with the rest me intertwined,
The question, O me! so sad, recurring—What good amid these, O me, O life?
Answer.
That you are here—that life exists and identity,
That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse.
Of the endless trains of the faithless, of cities fill’d with the foolish,
Of myself forever reproaching myself, (for who more foolish than I, and who more faithless?)
Of eyes that vainly crave the light, of the objects mean, of the struggle ever renew’d,
Of the poor results of all, of the plodding and sordid crowds I see around me
Of the empty and useless years of the rest, with the rest me intertwined,
The question, O me! so sad, recurring—What good amid these, O me, O life?
Answer.
That you are here—that life exists and identity,
That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse.
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