I’m done drinking
 

Ugh, hello SR.

Well I’ve officially done it to
myself. I went on a four day binger that followed me from the weekend. I didn’t eat for those four days and I drank pure liquor. I’ve of course had call into work this week.

I feel absolutely horrid today. I’ve had enough! I was sober there for awhile and I was really doing good! Then one moment of boredom led to this. I’m writhing in pain from the damage I did to myself.

I’m immensely ashamed of myself. I know better but I did it anyway. I feel at times when I’m drinking I have no self control. I even bought liquor yesterday at 7am! The cashiers of course look at me with disgust but they still sell to
me.

I’m hanging in there today and praying I never do this to myself again. IT’S NOT WORTH IT!

Oh my. This is really serious. I hope we can help, because no one deserves to live like that. Recovery is a process that takes some thought and action. Many of us have done it, some as bad off as you. Almost all of us here were from that sector of alcoholics that needed help from others to get over the beginner's hump and learn how to live without alcohol in our lives. It's a big deal to learn how. For normal people it's not a big deal. For alcoholics it's a very big deal. Maybe the most important life change you will ever make.

Welcome back, TakeAction.

I can only imagine how horribly you must feel, both physically and psychologically. We have been where you are. The very good news is that you never have to feel this way again.

Take very good care of yourself; drink water; have light meals; get fresh air if you are able (a short walk might help); listen to your body and get plenty of rest; shower and wash your hair. It may take a few days but you will start to feel better.

We are here to help you find that life-change and permanent sobriety and recovery we alcoholics need.

I hope, first of all, that you can eat something today and drink lots of water. That will help you to feel a bit better, I hope.

I think alcoholics have no self-control once they take the first sip of the first drink. However, you can stop drinking and begin to recover. It always helps to have a plan in mind for how you will stop drinking and how you will remain sober. Coming here to SR and reading and posting every day can be very helpful. And, I'm sure you know that you need to step away from the shame because it will push you back into drinking again. You can do this. :)

I’m drinking water and I’m about to try and eat. I really messed up.

This is it! I’m never drinking again. I owe myself a healthy life. There’s no such thing as moderation to an alcoholic. I can’t imagine the damage I’ve caused to my body.

Takeaction - That's exactly how I felt the last time I binged. I was so disgusted with my reckless behavior. I never did pick up again.
This can be where the misery ends for you.
I'm so glad you've reached this conclusion - and that you're here with us.

Thank you, Hevyn 🤍

I’ve done the “I’m never drinking again thing a million and one times.” This time is different…I actually scared myself. I have no control over myself when I’m under the influence. It’s not
cute nor respectable. How can a grown adult just fly off the handle like that?! I guess at the moment I felt like I didn’t have anything to lose.

This time around I KNOW this is it. My father even came to pick me up last night because he was afraid for me. He doesn’t deserve that! He deserves a happy and healthy daughter. I
promised him I would never drink again.

Going forward my answer to drinking is that I don’t partake because it simply makes me sick. My body rejects alcohol immediately as if I’m allergic. Ever since high school I was never in the drinking crowd..solely because I would throw up immediately. In college I forced it and discovered how devilishly good day drinking was. Well that’s all alcohol is…the devil.

Thank you, SR, for your support today.

Hi takeaction,
I’m glad you made it back :)

A determination not to drink again is a great starting point.
Fear never lasts though - think about how you will commit to recovery once the fear wears off?

D

Hi, Dee ☺️

I’m back to stay. I know that if I continue down that path I will lose everything. I lose myself every single time.

I have to stay strong and vocalize I don’t want to drink in any way. I can guarantee I will lose my job/lifestyle if I do this again. I refuse to put myself through the pain. There’s nothing positive that comes from alcohol.

Along with your daily prayers, add a program of recovery
by doing the footwork that is necessary and whatever happens,
don't drink.

Sometimes we think easier said than done, but, look
at the many who have found success in living a sober
life. They surrounded themselves with a support system
so that they never have to go thru anything along again
or by themselves.

Ask questions for guidance and continue on with an
open mind, willingness and honesty.

Strength and serenity all the way. :c014:

You said it all here. Keep posting and read your own words, you have some wisdom and you care about yourself. I believe you can do this!

Take, I have been there too and it is not a fun place to be at all. I knew when the liquor stores were open and looks that I got..or at least I think I got made me feel horrible, ashamed, embarrassed, the list could go on. I found coming to SR often reading, writing, etc has helped a lot. I wish you the very best.

Stats say about 95000 people die each year in US alone due to alcohol. That's 95000 families devastated. A spouse left alone, mourning parents, orphaned kids. Let us stay away from this commercialized poison every single day. You can do this.

I definitely don’t want to become this statistic. Alcoholism runs in my family so I’ve seen latter
losses due to the stuff.

Today is day two of my sobriety and I’m going back to work. Wish me luck as I hope I’m not in trouble. People get sick and come back without worry because they know they were really sick. I was sick due to my stupidly. I still feel
kind of foggy which is annoying as I slept about 9’hours last night.

Day two and holding on

Welcome back TA.

Good to see you joined the December class and are in fact "taking action".

Wishing you luck, and Great job!

I can't remember how many times I promised myself "Never again" and as soon as I felt better, the "Never again" happened again, and again, and again...... I watched my marriage, my children and my business fall from my clutches; never to return.

OP - don't be afraid to speak with your employer about your situation. You might be pleasantly surprised that they just might have coverage for what you are going through. I have met many men and women this last year that got honest with their bosses about their drinking problem and were blessed with treatment that they did not know even existed.

Being honest and completely transparent with your own self will bring you one of the greatest and un-imaginable gifts that you might ever receive.

Our logical common sense area of brain has shrunk, and our addicted, immediate gratification center has grown loomingly LARGE.

PLEASE SAVE YOURSELF.

We care, we’ve been there, and if we don’t lose the ONE thing, we lose everything, sometimes our life, mostly not guaranteed another chance at saving ourselves.

Much love and hugs as you learn to surf over the urges, and not drown in them.

I finally hit bottom so hard I want to be sober now. I don’t want the life I created for myself. I want happiness!

I really put my body through hell!! Today is day two of
my sobriety and I still feel really foggy. To make
matters worse my boss wasn’t too sympathetic. I’m ignoring it and just doing the best I can. I don’t want to bring it to their attention as I’m a new employee.

I have my willingness to stay clean and sober. The support of my Dad, SR, and I attended an AA meeting via zoom. I plan to continue this

Woot woot! Keep it up and make this your last day 2. You CAN do this!!:c005:

Have you talked with your doctor about how much and how often you drink TA? Suddenly cutting off alcohol can be very harmful or even deadly in some situations. We want the very best for you friend.