1 year and 8 months sober
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 500
1 year and 8 months sober
It's been a year and eight months that I have been sober. This was the exact time last time that I had relapsed. However this time I have been aware that it is possible to have a relapse where before I just assumed I would remain sober. Things are better being sober but I am beginning to feel like I have to do more to maintain my sobriety. The first year my only priority was to not pick up a drink. Now that I am well into my second year I realize that I want to join AA and do the 12 step program. I work for myself at home and most days I listen to talks from AA and the steps and I am blown away by the progress people have made for their wellbeing and I want that too. The pandemic made my isolation much worse than it had been before and I believe that isolation is the worst thing for addicts or anyone for that matter. Also, because I have been sober most of the people I hung out with before have stopped inviting me out because that is what they do is drink so I would like to start meeting some sober friends. Does anyone have any advice on AA and the steps?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2020
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 243
Congrats on almost 2 years. There is a 12 step forum on this site that is pretty good. Lots of information on there.
Do you have a sponsor? I think in person meetings are happening again in many places.
Happy Labor Day.
Do you have a sponsor? I think in person meetings are happening again in many places.
Happy Labor Day.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 500
Thank you Khorhey! I didn't know that there was a 12 step forum here. I will go and check it out. Yes, I was going to join AA before the summer but because we were busy I didn't want to commit if I couldn't show up regularly and now that school is beginning and the kids are going back I want to get started. Especially now because I feel like I am not exactly thriving in my sobriety and at this exact point I had relapsed before and more than anything I want to stay sober. I don't have a sponsor but I want one. I think once I begin the process of AA I can find one. Thank you for writing in.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2020
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 243
You don’t really have to join. Just show up when you can, meetings are open.
You are probably aware but there are zoom meetings all day online.
https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/
You are probably aware but there are zoom meetings all day online.
https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,510
Congratulations on your recovery, Cusper. It's so good that you're aware that you need to add something to your life to help support your recovery. I don't use AA, but I know that members always say you should try several meetings until you find a good fit. 
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 2,909
No advice to share, just my experience. The 12 steps of AA enabled me to live the life I always wanted for myself, comfortable in my own skin and with a quiet confidence that I now have the tools to deal with whatever comes down the pike, in a healthy proactive manner.
AA meetings won't keep me sober, but they are a wonderful and safe place to practice using the tools that I gained in working the 12 steps. Also they are full of like-minded people (sober focused) so that is a similarity that quickly opens the door to getting to know them better. Some become friends. Some become acquaintances. Some not so much. Basically a microcosm of the real world.
The 12 steps are outlined in the "big book" and give detailed instructions about working the steps. It is possible to work the steps without a sponsor, without meetings; but those are both helpful additions to a recovery plan. In early recovery, I lived on a island in the Caribbean where there was no AA whatsoever and where drinking was deeply ingrained in the culture, but I had my big book. I did discover an internet AA forum after awhile. That and I would occasionally go by boat to another island/country that did have AA meetings.
The main thing is that I was determined and open minded enough to find a way that AA would work for me in my given situation. Turns out it was only as hard as I made it. Actually it was way more simple than I imagined. I ain't going to lie though, the work of the 12 steps was hard, but the program (12 steps) itself is simple and straightforward.
I can't begin to describe the difference that working the 12 steps has made in my life. I am overwhelmed by the rewards. It has been worth every ounce of effort.
AA meetings won't keep me sober, but they are a wonderful and safe place to practice using the tools that I gained in working the 12 steps. Also they are full of like-minded people (sober focused) so that is a similarity that quickly opens the door to getting to know them better. Some become friends. Some become acquaintances. Some not so much. Basically a microcosm of the real world.
The 12 steps are outlined in the "big book" and give detailed instructions about working the steps. It is possible to work the steps without a sponsor, without meetings; but those are both helpful additions to a recovery plan. In early recovery, I lived on a island in the Caribbean where there was no AA whatsoever and where drinking was deeply ingrained in the culture, but I had my big book. I did discover an internet AA forum after awhile. That and I would occasionally go by boat to another island/country that did have AA meetings.
The main thing is that I was determined and open minded enough to find a way that AA would work for me in my given situation. Turns out it was only as hard as I made it. Actually it was way more simple than I imagined. I ain't going to lie though, the work of the 12 steps was hard, but the program (12 steps) itself is simple and straightforward.
I can't begin to describe the difference that working the 12 steps has made in my life. I am overwhelmed by the rewards. It has been worth every ounce of effort.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 500
Thank you everyone for the congrats... hi soberleigh! good to see you! and Khorhey for the link. Yes, Anna, I think the meeting I went to years ago was not a great fit so I am hoping I can find one. And D122y I am happy my post helped and please feel free to message me if you ever want to. And Nez yes, I am going to get a Big Book today. (or order one) I know that it will be scary to do the steps but really after listening to these AA recovery talks on youtube are blowing my mind. I am going to find some meetings and try to figure out which is a good fit. I also will try some online ones as well. At this point I am determined to find a way through the issues that hold me back in life. Thank you so much for writing in with your experience. I want that quiet confidence that I can handle life when it comes along. My last relapse showed that although I was ok when I was sober I didn't handle it so well when many things went wrong I picked up that drink. I need to figure out how to deal with things when things go wrong. I really appreciate people writing to me today. I really needed it. I never want to go back to drinking and although it's been 20 months I still feel like a newcomer and have to do much work to remain sober and strong.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 2,909
I know that it will be scary to do the steps
Working the steps was scary, but in a good way because it held the key to a better future.
Returning to drinking is scary in a bad way because it holds the key to hell.
I escaped and I ain't going back. Continuing to live in the principals learned while working the steps, insures that I will continue to walk as a free man instead of being a dead man walking. What a concept!!!
FEAR
Face
Everything
And
Recover
...scary good, oh yeah!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 500
Again thank you for all of the well wishes.
Nez, Yes! my fear of ever drinking again trumps my doing the steps which I know is necessary. I do live in lots of fears of many things. There are lots of thing I want to change and I feel like doing the steps will help me.
Nez, Yes! my fear of ever drinking again trumps my doing the steps which I know is necessary. I do live in lots of fears of many things. There are lots of thing I want to change and I feel like doing the steps will help me.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
