VikingGF

I'm actually proud to be in this clan of recovering people. I find people in recovery to be more empathetic, self-aware and even-keeled for the most part- and the ones with years of sobriety seem very wise and grounded. Something to aspire to.

jagrnaut

I completely agree with this statement. It might be that a lot of us here have had to do a lot of soul searching and will continue to do so. Recovery is a journey that for good or bad begins to peel back the layers of us and in my opinion is one of the toughest, but most rewarding things. Hiding behind the bottle was never, ever solving anything.

Tailai

Sign me up with the "no" group. I'm not entirely shameless but I can't ever think of a situation where I shamed someone. It seems cruel even if it's warranted - to humiliate a person. Better to be curious.

mns1

I also strongly agree with Viking. I love listening to sober veterans talk. I've actually really gotten into listening/watching interviews with people who have years of sobriety. I just listened to the latest episode of Steve-O's Wild Ride (I'd post the link but I'm not certain if that's allowed). Steve-O has been sober like 15 years and he talks to Bam Margera who just hit one year after struggling for a long time. It's amazing to hear how Steve-O masterfully analyzes Bam's thinking and wording and responds with exactly what Bam needs to hear in a firm but empathetic way. Back in high school I used to watch Steve-O partake in some of the most self-destructive behavior imaginable. It's in incredible to see how mature and how wise he is now. Highly recommend giving it a listen.

kes

Hear Hear Claycutts - Like the post! Way to call it! 100% agreed.

I'm as stubborn as a mule and the more people that know the more I will feel like I've failed if I take another drink. My personality WON'T take too kindly to that! That will hurt me down to my core TBH that's been a major factor keeping me going. I can't stand losing and that's what I'd be doing, losing to the devil!!! That ain't good!!!!!

Kaily

I would like to add to this that I do have a lot of regrets of stuff I did and that was done to me while in active alcoholism. All part of the disease but still hard to live with.

At the end of my drinking when things had escalated to all day drinking at home, I wouldn't answer the door or phone. I told people things were out of control I but was embarrassed for them to actually witness me in a state where I could barely function.

There are so many layers to addiction that it is hard to actually give a clear answer to the title of the thread.

It is good to reflect .

kes

Thanks for sharing kailey So sorry to hear about your past. You're doing great moving forwards!

Everyone has a reason even if they can't find it or explain it. That's where consellors and meetings are good.

When I originally put the thread on SR, I was unsure wheteher people would respond. I'm amazed at the number that have. The replies have been vastly different and that's been a real eye opener for me. I deliberately started with a strong stance (which to this day I still believe) not knowing where it would lead the conversation. One commonality we all share whether ashamed or not, is getting better and moving forward in our lives, helping each other and looking forward to a better sober life.

Than'ks for all your contibutions, they've been great and I wish all of you that better, brighter future. I'll finish my contribution with a quote from Paul Heaton, lead singer with the band The Beautiful South "I didn't choose the drink, the drink chose me."

L&BW,

Kes

nez

The how and why of my alcoholism is a complex Gordian knot without a simple black and white answer, but in recovery I found an approach to the problem that renders the perceived constraints of the problem moot, so basic short answer...no, I am not ashamed of my alcoholism.

In the past I have been ashamed of my actions and behaviors while an active alcoholic, but I have taken corrective and healing measures that have lain the shame to rest.

Today I am not proud of my alcoholism, but I am grateful to my alcoholism because it led me to the path I am today.

Evoo

THIS. It’s a wild thing to shift from shame to pride, but that’s what recovery can offer. Not sure who said it first, but sobriety really does deliver on everything alcohol promises — it’s not even close. I’m proud to be a member of the SR community.

silentrun

I'm not ashamed in the least. On the contrary, I admire myself and anyone else who can survive all we have.