Quitorelse

So I have 14 days today and haven't felt like drinking at all!
Today I got angry at someone who I feel under valued my time and worth! Big trigger for me!
My mind immediately went to saying go ahead and have a drink! I guess I need to get to the bottom of why this is such a trigger for me!
I am still angry about it but I am not going to drink over it!

Dee74

strong emotion is often a trigger for a lot of us cos a lot of us self medicated with alcohol etc to deal with those kinds of emotions.

The best thing you can do is get through this sober and show yourself it can be done

Congrats on 2 weeks

D

Hodd

Hi Quito, first of all, you didn’t take that drink. I think you know you would’ve done in the past, so that’s a big big positive. Those sort of triggers will take a few months to subside. The best thing to do - easier said than done - is to avoid them for now. I still get quite angry about people, often more than I should, but touch wood I’ve enough sober time under my belt that it’s not likely to cause a relapse. I wouldn’t worry too much about the trigger. Take heart than you rose above it.

VikingGF

Good job on 2 weeks~ that’s great!

Free2bme888

You came here, that’s great!

We've trained our brains a long time to deal with stress in a self harming way, it takes some time to retrain it.

Today was great retraining by NOT picking up!

Huge congrats on two weeks! 🎊🪅🎉🎏🪄🎁🎈

Anna

Good job on 14 days of sobriety and on getting through a tough day today.

Bekindalways

Hey Quitorelse, you knew this day would come and it looks like you had a plan to come post here. Well done.

Carry on you fine person!

advbike

Yup, it's all about emotional triggers for me too - happy, angry, lonely, frustrated (a big one), etc. For some reason sad events never caused me to drink much, I suppose because I knew it would depress me further. But all those other ones for sure.

Great job on just feeling them and not taking a drink - that's the key, and gets easier with time.

AL48

Well done on 14 days Quit.
Im the same and have a pretty stressful job dealing with the public but i now meditate twice a day (never thought I'd say that) and it helps me calm down when i need it.
I was the type of person who thought it was embarrassing to say you were practicing mindfulness but im the opposite now🙂. For me its all about looking after myself and making sure im ok and if i do come up against these problems i have tools now to help me deal with it.
Congrats again keep going.

Hodd

I can’t understate the number of triggers I encountered in my early months. I wasn’t ready at all. One example was an airport departure lounge. Now I’m not scared of flying, but I find the security checks a hassle and always had 2 or 3 overpriced beers afterwards. So after three months sober, I had a trip and really longed for a beer. Fortunately that feeling passed, but I was surprised how strong the trigger was. I don’t have many/any triggers now or maybe I haven’t stumbled upon them yet. Be careful, Quito. There’ll be more, but you’re doing well.

Quitorelse

Thanks everyone! Yes I need to watch out for these types of triggers! I also need to keep HALT in mind and step back from what ever it is that is getting me angry !
Another day to be able to not pick up the drink!
The next 3 or 4 days I am going to be driving from North Carolina up to Maine for the summer. I am going to be out of my comfort zone and probably getting stressed out!
I will check in often along the way!

novips

I have come to conclude that there is a type of alcoholic for whom Alcoholics Anonymous is the only solution. For this type, no amount of work on triggers -- standing alone -- is going to keep the drink at bay for long. Of course, the Steps of A.A. include taking personal inventory, which can be understood as a means for identifying and addressing triggers. But this is only part of the process. As the Big Book says:

The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so-called will power becomes practically nonexistent. We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago. We are without defense against the first drink....

There is a solution. Almost none of us liked the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process requires for its successful consummation. But we saw that it really worked in others, and we had come to believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as we had been living it. When, therefore, we were approached by those in whom the problem had been solved, there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet.

DriGuy

In those situations, almost anyone would feel angry an hurt. I don't think feelings are the big issue here though. The more mature person reacts differently to the same feelings that send the alcoholic into a binge.

Recovery is about behavior change. Yes we also meditate on our inner selves. This is advocated in almost all programs, and we talk about that often, but recovery is about changing your behavior, and not drinking over what a more healthy mature person would let pass.

And that is exactly what you recognized, and what you did when you avoided by not reacting with the unhealthy drinking response. So don't change this part. You already know what to do, and you see that you have the ability to do it. That is the ball to keep your eye on, and it will be your focus well into years of recovery. Continue doing the soul searching, but always be ready to react by NOT drinking. This is rule number one.

This is the simple response, and it doesn't need to be over complicated with a lot of deep psychoanalysis, and you need to keep doing the no drink response until it eventually becomes second nature. Coincidentally, this behavior change will facilitate the emotional growth part of recovery, which will still be there for you to contemplate, and it will be much easier in the absence of a brain filled with alcoholic fog.

MrPL

This is awesome Quitor!

It’s a really good insight, basically a trigger only “suggests a drink”, but it doesn’t make you have one.

What executes it is the decision to drink, which regardless of the trigger all of us can 100% ALWAYS control.

Quitorelse

I posted this in the May thread but wanted to post it here as well!

Good Morning Y'all!
2 weeks in the bank and on to another day!
I am feeling so much better physically and mentally it is hard to believe that only 2 weeks without the booze one could feel so much better! My blood pressure has come down to an outstanding level and my Dr said I might be able to go off the BP medication by the end of the month!
To all of you just starting out please give it a chance so you too can feel better!
I was buying 2 half gallons of vodka a week so my drinking was pretty severe!
I have not seen one down side to quitting drinking only positive for me! It ain't easy but it is so rewarding! I am grateful that I don't have to drink today!

Quitorelse

Driving on the road today heading from North Carolina to Maine! I will check in when I am not driving! Looking forward to another sober day

Hawkeye13

That sounds like fun— I really like Maine but haven’t been in more than 30 years.

RunningScared

14 days! Sweet!

Britbird80

Congratulations on 2 weeks quit 👏

Dee74

Enjoy your sober trip
D