Lila12

I just can't face another trip to the ER

advbike

Put yourself first, Lila. Don't listen to that voice. You need support and there’s no shame in that.

Obladi

Yes, Lila - you actually can face another trip to the ER. You could also face a trip to rehab.
Do you want to? Hell, no. Who wants to do either of those things? Pretty much almost nobody.
But you and me, girl - we're strong. The things we've survived are absolutely horrible. But we are still here.

Here's the choice you face: Keep going like this until God knows when OR do the thing you know must be done to get sober.

A guy in a meeting once stated this question in a way that really hit home with me. "What is the worst thing that could happen if you keep drinking?" I think for most people, the answer would be that they lose their family, their home, their job, or even their life. When I really considered the question seriously, I realized that the absolute worst thing that could happen is that I would continue to live the life I was living. Indefinitely.

I learned from personal recent experience that it could be worse. I could actually do enough damage to incapacitate my mental faculties. Now that is a sobering thought.

Do the hard thing. You might hate it, but in the end you'll be glad you did.

O