anxiousrock

I drank a lot again. Started Thursday night knowing I wouldn't have to go to work the next day.
I drank 15 beers, 4 wine coolers. Then I got 3 bottles of wine and 3 wine coolers.
its all gone.
​​gone.i drank it all.
I'm horrified. Plus the reason I couldn't go to work is because i am sick and I took a covid test today and it was positive.
I have had a really, really bad year so far.
My poor liver.

anxiousrock

I kept drinking until early this morning. I havent been able to tall at all either, covid sucks....I am in so much pain.

ToughChoices

I’m so sorry you’re ill! I had COVID in January and went through withdrawal from opioids at that time (not because I was entering a recovery mindset, just because I was firmly in denial and didn’t have access to my DOC) It was terrible.

I had horrible insomnia and body aches, total lethargy, stomach ailments, and cough. I’m sure that drinking makes all of that feel worse, so that sounds like hell. It can be so hard to do what’s good for your body and mind. 😔

Drink some mint tea and a big glass of ice water. Read a good novel, and try to sleep off the worst of this!

Tomorrow is a new chance to continue walking towards your new, imperfect but lovely, sober life.

Love to you!
-TC

calmself

About 38 drinks in 2 days. This is a big amount of alcohol for anyone. Maybe you should consider an inpatient rehab, I guess.

Dee74

I’m sorry you’re so ill, AR.
Clearly something needs to change?
D

anxiousrock

I know I should . And I am.

Hodd

As calm says, that’s a dangerous amount, AR. You said poor liver, and it really won’t be able to cope.

I don’t like repeating the stories about my wife’s friend with alcohol-related cirrhosis but here goes. He’s only a bit older than me, and I didn’t even think he drank that much. Liver disease has no symptoms whatsoever until it’s irreversible. He collapsed and was diagnosed with very severe cirrhosis. He needs to get his belly drained every week or so, and I think he has to go to hospital every day for one reason or another. It’s game over. The only chance is a liver transplant and imagine having that operation to have an organ the size of a football replaced. I wouldn’t cope mentally with it. Someone (a younger person because older donor’s livers won’t be used) has to die to give that gift. I’d turn it down. Let someone who had liver disease from illness or genetics live. But by the grace of whoever, I’ll never have to go on such a gruesome journey as my wife’s friend. I see him as a parallel version of me, and it’s bloody scary. It’s not lost on my wife either. She knows I’d have ended up like that.

It’s now serious, AR. Whatever you’ve done in the past hasn’t worked. A lot of changes need to be made.

RAL

I'm so sorry you are in so much pain Sam. I had covid recently too and was shocked at how ill it made me. That's a serious amount of booze. Can you get medical assistance for detox/rehab. I'm glad you posted on here and it will get better.

anxiousrock

I know it is a dangerous amount to drink. I'm a binge drinker. Drinking every few weeks, although this is by far the most I've ever had.
I dont have any detox or withdrawal symptoms. But i will now be looking into outpatient places if they are available here.
as for my liver, I'll have to get some tests done again i guess. I'm sure I've done some damage lately. I've been drinking more in the past few months than I care to admit. And it's always binge drinking.

Donnylutz

I'm so sorry you are going through this and feel so awful. Lots of us here know that feeling all too well.

As a fellow former binge drinker here, that amount of alcohol is really dangerous. Regardless on if you are thinking about treatment or not, it may be a good idea to be checked out by a Dr regardless. I never had any withdrawal symptoms in my drinking career (outside of horrid hangovers), but you never know when that may change, and coming off that much alcohol can be life threatening.

My last binge lasted about 3 days. It was determined I didn't need detox, but I had to keep someone with me incase anything happened. I felt so sick and tired, just horrible. It was such a terrible experience - I used it to get my ass some help.

You are miserable right now. It doesn't have to be for nothing. You don't have to stay on this merry-go-round. It sounds like you are thinking about treatment - I hope you give that some serious thought.

I feel for you - so many here have been right where you are, and it sucks. Sending you light and love. Please keep us updated. 💙

Anna

Anxiousrock, I'm sorry this happened. Alcoholism is progressive and it sounds like you have found things worsening.

Do you have an idea what you can do differently or what you can add to your program? What led you to begin drinking on Thursday?

samwitch

I'm so sorry Sam. That sounds awful.

anxiousrock

i was starting to feel sick and it triggered me.

Jillian2563

Mental health is what is most concerning to me with those amounts of alcohol.

Can you go to a hospital to detox and check into a rehab?

Jillian2563

I just read that you plan on calling outpatient rehabs - that’s sounds like a good plan to start since you aren’t having withdrawals.

anxiousrock

it's been over 24hrs since my last drink so i don't think i need to detox. However I am looking at some possible recovery programs offered here.

RAL

I think medical help still a good idea. Dt s can happen on days 2 and 3

Hevyn

AR - I remember how painful it was the times I did that. I'm just a small woman, but I could put away a 30 pack of beer in one day in the end. Eventually my binge drinking led to drinking every day. As Anna said, it's progressive. I assumed I'd always stop in between binges, but as time went on it became impossible.

I'm glad you posted about what happened. We are all on your team. Hoping you'll get the help you need.

anxiousrock

thank you. I have reached out to a place here that does in and out patient. Something needs to change and maybe that's the help I need.

Pekelover2

I’m so sorry Anxiousrock.
I wish I had something to offer you. But I just want you to know that I’m thinking of you.
I’m a binge drinker too. (I’m a small person, so a bottle of wine is about all that I can handle). I had an episode of binge drinking during my recent bout with covid, I truly feel that it made my symptoms worse.

Please try to post here if you feel anxious or scared. We’re here for you!!