Hodd

I’ve seen a couple of threads recently where people had a good few months of sober time but seemed to be expecting better things. They’ll come, but the changes may be small.

I’ve long since plateaued, at least I think so, and recently took on a bit too much. As well as the day job, I do a few hours a week of online teaching. I enjoy it and the kids/parents are happy. One parent asked me to teach year 11 (age 15/16) maths to a student sitting exams in just a couple of months. I said yes even though maths isn’t my specialism, as I teach maths to a younger student already. Whoops. Once I looked at the topics, I knew I’d messed up. It’d take me hours and hours to prepare for each lesson, and that’s an awful feeling knowing you’ll try and wing your way with a student who presumably trusts you. I had to e-mail the parent just now and say I couldn’t spare the time. The kid, who seemed to like me, will get a lesson that adults are not always right - and hopefully a proper maths teacher.

Bit of a first world problem and not a drink-related issue, but whilst we’ll all improve with sobriety, we should be realistic about this.

Dee74

Knowing my limits and not over committing is one of my recovery tools for sure Hodd.

D

D122y

I didn't trust myself that much in the first couple of years of sobriety.

I pretty much just went for it and then dealt with the fall out.

At least I was dealing with it sober.

I haven't changed much since those first couple of years except I feel generally more energetic, quick witted, and patient than before.

I laugh easier and poke fun at myself and situations. I try not to target people specifically although I catch myself doing it sometimes.

Otherwise, the clean version of myself is basically a better version. Like a D122y 2.0 with an upgraded operating system. Most of the bugs are fixed.

Still very grateful. I am an addict for life.

Thanks.

Steely

Thanks for your post Hodd. I'm learning same. A good thing.

advbike

Fantastic, Hodd. That's the sort of thing I tend to try and plow through and everyone loses. Good job admitting your limits and saying no.

Hodd

Thanks Dee, plenty of other stuff I could be doing other than maths

Another lesson learned I think is if you don’t like doing something, try and do something else.

My day yesterday was a bit much looking back. I had an online lesson first thing, then a morning working remotely but had to drive in, a round trip of 90 miles. Then I had a training session with my running club and then tried to prepare for this maths student (and realising I’d messed up). Not much chilling out in there, none in fact, but I’m happy to say no cravings at all. Having a random jam-packed bizarre day isn’t on my trigger list

fishkiller

As Clint East wood said " a man's got to know his limitations".

I am guilty of over committing myself. It's a work in progress as I hate to say no or admit I cannot do something.
Sober this is fixable. While I was drinking it was inevitable.

MrPL

Hey Hood - I see this as a positive, you are pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. Just because you went a little too far out now it doesn’t mean it isn’t a healthy process, which is only possible because of your sobriety!

Nice one!

Hodd

^ That’s true, thanks, MrP. I m certainly not done with maths yet, but this kid has their final exam in a matter of weeks, and they need a good maths grade for their next plan. I might’ve been able to help them in the time available, but I’d have had to work my socks off with little to offer.

I can’t believe I fitted all that in yesterday, though. That was sober people can try and do on occasion. A drinker would struggle.

Forwards

I'm struggling with commitments and over-commitments here myself at over 3 years sober.

At first, once the fog had cleared, I felt a need to catch up and compensate for the lost years. I worked furiously and gained good results. Now however I'm trying to find a more sustainable balance. It's all new to me but I'll do my best as always...

Forwards.

Hodd

Thanks Forwards. We can always scale back on our commitments. We’ll still achieve loads more than our former selves. We’re in a much better place.